Are you a jerk?

[Architect]

Or a nice person? Segregated into Extraverted and Introverted camps.

 

[Minuend]

Extroverted and both/ neither

Good deeds does not come from "nice" they come from other motivations more complex and circumstantial.

 

[Deleted member 1424]

I'm a nice introverted jerk.

 

[Hadoblado]

I can't really vote honestly.

There are reasons to consider me both a nice person and a jerk, it depends who you ask and at what time. I'm pretty introverted though.

 

[Jennywocky]

I'm a generally kind person with sharp teeth.

 

[TBerg]

I am nicer than a lot of other people, but I am aware that I have many blindspots. I am generally self-interested and callous as a result of many defense mechanisms that I have used both to justify my place in the world as well as to keep me from being vulnerable to the sadness of myself and others. I have some bipolarity when it comes to actually caring about things.

 

[Hawkeye]

Yes.

 

[PmjPmj]

It depends on the context.

I am as nice as the day is long... until something or someone pisses me off, at which point I'm very likely to tell it how it is.

Certainly, I aim to be a decent human being.

 

[Ex-User (8886)]

I'm not nice person (and don't even want) so I chose an I, and a jerk

 

[Jennywocky]

I'm not nice person (and don't even want) so I chose an I, and a jerk

Awww. It was nice of you to be so honest.

 

[doncarlzone]

I'm an introverted jerk with good intentions

EDIT:

This is most likely not true but that's what initially came to my mind.

 

[EyeSeeCold]

Or a nice person? Segregated into Extraverted and Introverted camps.

Similar to what Minuend said, I don't think nice describes a person's moral content it just refers to its presentation and passive aggression(which I wouldn't say falls under "nice") can be packaged with a "nice" personality.

In the same way, sometimes a "jerk" just has poor communication skills which don't necessarily reflect a person's social attitudes, actions or intentions(on the flipside positive intentions/attitudes without any actual good deeds could be "jerkish").

For the purposes of this thread it would be interesting to see a nice/jerk assessment (like the Big 5) with scales for various sub traits.

To personally answer the poll would be problematic for the reasons stated above, I could agree/disagree with either one.

 

[Pizzabeak]

Circumstantial? There's at least one person who can be qualified to describe me as mean/jerk, but I know there are moments where I'm pretty chill.

 

[Red myst]

If by "jerk" you mean brutally honest at all times, I say no. Its not in my best interest, and I find it unsettling when I have to get brutally honest, but I don't shy away from the my opinion when put on the spot. I am just very diplomatic about it. The ability to tell a person to go to hell and have them looking forward to the trip is a favorite tactic of mine.
I cant vote on this because I need more context. This is just like those stupid BMTI online test questions. Why don't you also ask me if "your ever late for appointments" also.
I know you know better than to ask a question like this.

See, this is me trying not to be a jerk, after all I took the bait on this one so I am partially at fault.

By the way I am an "I".

 

[Architect]

Awww. It was nice of you to be so honest.

heh heh ... yeah one of my reasons for the thread. An INTP friend and I have a theory that "Everybody is a fuck" and I was curious if people view themselves as such. Also it seemed there might be a E-I connection. In my observations E's think of themselves as awesome people, and I's less so, but I'm not sure about that.

Personally I see myself as a stealth jerk. On the surface I seem like an OK guy, but get to know me and you see the jerk.

 

[kris]

I trend more toward 'nice' than 'jerk' on average. I am at least a little of both depending on context, though characteristically, I wouldn't say I am either.

I voted nIce. It feels like self-flattery which makes me uneasy.

 

[Grayman]

I don't know and don't really care if I am labeled as a jerk and often that is the case. It is also often that I am told I am nice.

I only care that I do everything within reason to be generous and keep the others feelings as a priority in my decisions.

The part “within reason” is really important in this.

It means that I will promote a healthy lifestyle in the bigger picture if it means hurting their feelings in the short term. Granted, you could say I am arrogant to presume that I know what is best for them but from another perspective I am simply giving them the opportunity to deal with the truth in whichever way they wish instead of deciding them incapable of handling it and taking it upon myself to keep them in the dark.

An easy answer?

I am an introvert. I tell the truth regardless of how cruel it may make me seem but I do everything in my power to bring it to light gently.

Therefore I would define myself as nice. You could certainly write down jerk in your log if that seems to fit me better in your eyes. It is entirely possible I am self-diluted for if I am blind how would I know I did not see if no one ever told me there was something to see. But then if they told me as they have that I am a jerk how do I know this to be true if I cannot see it for myself?

…That answer did not seem any easier…

 

[Grayman]

I voted nIce. It feels like self-flattery which makes me uneasy.

Sounds like something a nice person would say.

...

or a person trying to cover up their arragonce.

I highly suspect the first.

 

[TimeAsylums]

heh heh ... yeah one of my reasons for the thread. An INTP friend and I have a theory that "Everybody is a fuck" and I was curious if people view themselves as such. Also it seemed there might be a E-I connection. In my observations E's think of themselves as awesome people, and I's less so, but I'm not sure about that.

Personally I see myself as a stealth jerk. On the surface I seem like an OK guy, but get to know me and you see the jerk.

I'm an E and an awesome person, but I know I'm a jerk


imo everyone who voted nice person should hang themselves

[bimgx=250]http://ialwayshaveaplan.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/house_md_poster4.jpg[/bimgx]

everybody lies is a jerk (whether by stealth or not)

 

[scorpiomover]

Probably.

 

[scorpiomover]

heh heh ... yeah one of my reasons for the thread. An INTP friend and I have a theory that "Everybody is a fuck" and I was curious if people view themselves as such. Also it seemed there might be a E-I connection. In my observations E's think of themselves as awesome people, and I's less so, but I'm not sure about that.

E = objectivity. I = subjectivity. As Jung explained, Is show more egotism, and thus are far more likely to be a jerk.

Es are likely to do the objective thing, and ignore the subjective needs of the lone I in the group. More likely to run roughshod over your feelings without realising it.

The I, being properly egotistical, considers it "normal" that everyone takes his needs serioiusly, even though he's never spoken of them to the E, or anyone else in the group.

I think you're confusing Extroversion with Perceptual dominance. ExxPs (Pe-doms) and IxxJs (Pi-doms) seem to consistently talk as if either they are awesome and everyone else is just "average", or they are normal and everyone else is sub-sub-sub-sub-human. Either way, amounts to the same thing.

 

[Spirit]

I am a Jerk but I have been told all my life to be kind.

I am working on it, but deep down I am a jerk.

 

[Grayman]

I am a Jerk but I have been told all my life to be kind.

I am working on it, but deep down I am a jerk.

why do you say you are a jerk if you try?

 

[Spirit]

why do you say you are a jerk if you try?

Because I default at "Jerk" and I am learning to be kind.

 

[JimJambones]

I'm pleasant on the outside and treat others with kindness, but some of my thoughts make me feel like an asshole sometimes. I'll need a few days to decide before I vote.

 

[Pyropyro]

Introverted and nice.

 

[NormannTheDoorman]

All of the above when not speaking.

 

[Duxwing]

I'm a happy, introverted puff-ball wanting to love, hug, amuse all the things! Hurt me, and I will cope until I lose my head and devour yours.

-Duxwing

 

[Ex-User (9086)]

Jerk for some, sometimes regrettably, sometimes pleasurably.

Nice person for some, sometimes regrettably, sometimes pleasurably.

 

[_Mia_]

Introverted jerk, but with a sweet, soft core. A jerk nonetheless.

 

[Analyzer]

We are all fucks in our own ways. NTPs are the chameleons so possibly are the "biggest" fucks.

 

[digitalbum]

Absolutely not. And anyone that says different is asking for a knuckle sandwich.

I'm sarcastic to most, friendliest to the downtrodden, and the biggest jerk on the planet to major assholes.

 

[digitalbum]

We are all fucks in our own ways. NTPs are the chameleons so possibly are the "biggest" fucks.

Chameleon in what way? Not social? I thought that was ENTPs or ENFPs.

 

[TimeAsylums]

Chameleon in what way? Not social? I thought that was ENTPs or ENFPs.

Ne (auxiliary in the INTP), but yes dom in the ENPs

This is an ENTP thing. It's the INTP-esque chameleon effect, taken to over 9000 by the power of dominant Ne. Nearly every interaction doesn't involve the individual, but the empty shells that they create as a means to explore what they actually believe. The finest quality decoys imaginable.

^^

 

[nexion]

Another stealth jerk here. I am amiable enough when you first get to know me (because I am trying to get a feel for how our personalities will interact without actually letting our personalities interact), but spend enough time with me and you might just realize all of the asshole things I do under a thick disguise of bitter cynicism and misanthropy. I guess that, for the most part, the jerk-ish things I do and / or say are mostly inscrutable to anyone except myself, which is kind of nice. But the more I get to know you, the more likely I am to break out of the boundaries I have set for myself because I was not aware of the boundaries of your own personality, but now that I am, my actions become much more overt, so long as they do not offend your sensibilities. Unless, of course, I am exuding negative energies for some reason, in that case I will do whatever I damn well please and disregard any consequences that may result.

People tend to be kind of complex. I have always been wary of people who look at these complexities and try to compress them down into a neatly digestible system. Bonus points if that system involves easily delineable dichotomous traits and perfect symmetry.

 

[tvrgvryen]

I'm introverted and generally kind. But my reticence and placid demeanor are perceived as hostile and I'm quickly judged as unfriendly. The only times I feel a bit mean are when I don't put others' needs before mine, even if the cost of doing so is minor/petty. I consider it as survival in some lesser form. I don't like to be passive or to let others take advantage of me, so this is my way of feeling assertive.

 

[digitalbum]

Another stealth jerk here. I am amiable enough when you first get to know me (because I am trying to get a feel for how our personalities will interact without actually letting our personalities interact), but spend enough time with me and you might just realize all of the asshole things I do under a thick disguise of bitter cynicism and misanthropy.

Wow. You just described me to a T when it comes to initial interactions. I VERY often come off as an asshole, but it's far from the truth. It's more of a test, to see who can hang with me. I'm a little older (30) so I generally don't like wasting time finding new friends. And with this technique (i don't even think it's a technique just how i am now) I rarely make new friends, but when I do, they are SOLID.

Of course, I gauge a person's sensitivity. And if I feel they can't handle my thick sarcasm and ball busting, I BACK OFF.

And FYI, @nil, there's no way you're not an ENTP.

 

[digitalbum]

Ne (auxiliary in the INTP), but yes dom in the ENPs

(sidenote) ELI5, I'm an MBTI amateur at best, but as I understand it, primary function is the taking in of information and auxiliary is the processing of it. How does an INTP take in information from within? I realize I may be confused here.

 

[Jennywocky]

(sidenote) ELI5, I'm an MBTI amateur at best, but as I understand it, primary function is the taking in of information and auxiliary is the processing of it. How does an INTP take in information from within? I realize I may be confused here.

No, let me tweak this for you.

Judgment functions evaluate data.
Perceiving functions take them in.


For an INTP, our primary is a judging function (Ti). So our primary focus is the evaluating of any incoming data, to draw workable hypotheses and essentially create models and internally consistent / logical arguments. The perceiving function (Ne, for us) generally fuels the Ti process.

What the system suggests about ENTPs it that they use Ti in service of Ne. The focus is more on doing or making things work (implementing possibilities) using rational steps. Production is aimed at the external, not internal world. Whereas INTPs tend to explore thoughts and ideas, ENTPs are more aimed at external reality and experimenting with how to create things "out there."

 

[digitalbum]

No, let me tweak this for you.

Judgment functions evaluate data.
Perceiving functions take them in.


For an INTP, our primary is a judging function (Ti). So our primary focus is the evaluating of any incoming data, to draw workable hypotheses and essentially create models and internally consistent / logical arguments. The perceiving function (Ne, for us) generally fuels the Ti process.

What the system suggests about ENTPs it that they use Ti in service of Ne. The focus is more on doing or making things work (implementing possibilities) using rational steps. Production is aimed at the external, not internal world. Whereas INTPs tend to explore thoughts and ideas, ENTPs are more aimed at external reality and experimenting with how to create things "out there."

Ok, I'm getting warmer. But I kind of thought the J(udging) and P(erceiving) was mostly how organized a person is or isn't with the rest of their personality.

So you're saying you logically evaluate your external surroundings piecemeal, and then construct some kind of internal operating system to make sense of it?

sorry, I'm getting off topic here, but hey, I'm an ENTP.

 

[TimeAsylums]

Ok, I'm getting warmer. But I kind of thought the J(udging) and P(erceiving) was mostly how organized a person is or isn't with the rest of their personality.

JennyWocky is correct,

And regarding the above, no that's just a stereotype.

 

[digitalbum]

JennyWocky is correct,

And regarding the above, no that's just a stereotype.

Ok so, Ps generally take in more info, while Js, though they do take in info, they are more action and decision oriented in the external world?

 

[Grayman]

Ok so, Ps generally take in more info, while Js, though they do take in info, they are more action and decision oriented in the external world?

P is more likely to think things through organize thoughts but rarely do they act outwardly upon them.

J is more likely to organize their surroundings and make decisions outwardly.

The level of organization is a personal trait in my opinion. The direction of organization Inward/outward can often be associated by type. J's seem more organized more often simply because they are more likely to exert their logic/organization in plain view instead of internally where non but the organizer can see.

EDIT:

An intp can be even more OCD outwardly than an INTJ but it is likely specific and due to a passion about the topic or whatever it is.

 

[digitalbum]

P is more likely to think things through organize thoughts but rarely do they act outwardly upon them.

J is more likely to organize their surroundings and make decisions outwardly.

The level of organization is a personal trait in my opinion. The direction of organization Inward/outward can often be associated by type. J's seem more organized more often simply because they are more likely to exert their logic/organization in plain view instead of internally where non but the organizer can see.

Yeah, I've definitely always understood J and P being how your behavior appears to others, but I suppose that's just secondary.

Anyway, back to being jerks or not jerks. I'm friendly as fuck.

 

[TimeAsylums]

I'm friendly as fuck.

I love ENTPs... (that includes myself)

Anyway, back to being jerks or not jerks

x2 I'm zealously friendly as well, but i'm still a jerk

 

[Jennywocky]

Yeah, I've definitely always understood J and P being how your behavior appears to others, but I suppose that's just secondary.

Anyway, back to being jerks or not jerks. I'm friendly as fuck.

You're so fucking P, you make me sick + trembly all over, all at the same time.

 

[TimeAsylums]

You're so fucking P, you make me sick + trembly all over, all at the same time.

I bet you voted for "nice" instead of "jerk" didn't you

lol

 

[Jennywocky]

I bet you voted for "nice" instead of "jerk" didn't you

lol

Naw, I didn't vote.
I thought the poll was shit.


EDIT: Uhh... I guess I'm moving closer to "jerk," aren't I? Sigh.

 

[digitalbum]

You're so fucking P, you make me sick + trembly all over, all at the same time.

Awww, shucks.

 

[StevenM]

I usually always take consideration of other people. I guess this makes me a 'nice' person. But when my needs aren't met, I will usually break this down, and start prioritizing myself more. A lot of times, I'll accidentally say something that stimulates a negative reaction to the sensitive feeler types. I don't have bad intentions, it's just that some people are way too sensitive, and can't handle suggestions or opinions.

I'm practicing at setting boundaries with people, and being assertive.