Any INTPs with neurological or psychiatric health issues?

[moody]

Hello!

I have a neurological autoimmune disorder that sucks. Symptoms are highly variable person to person, so I was wondering if there was any other INTPs here who can relate!

 

[a_ghost_from_your_past]

Neuroborreliosis (from multiple tick bites, i had dogs and cats as vectors) and Schizoid Personality Disorder (genetic and environmental).
Testing dependent on the mood of day as INTP or INTJ.

 

[kora]

I don't personally, but you'll find a fair portion of people here who do yes. Whether or not they are INTP will be harder to figure out as most people here seem to switch types.

 

[moody]

Neuroborreliosis (from multiple tick bites, i had dogs and cats as vectors) and Schizoid Personality Disorder (genetic and environmental).
Testing dependent on the mood of day as INTP or INTJ.

I don’t know how else to put this, but that outright sucks. Must take a toll on just about...every aspect of living. I asked in the first place out of honest curiousity of how many other people have diagnoses within the same realm. Hard to do the same in person, since neurological and mental health conerns are typically things people shy away from. It’s “uncomfortable.” Thanks for sharing.

 

[computerhxr]

I've never been diagnosed with anything, however, I spent a majority of my life with cronic pain and inflammation. My nervous system is highly sensitive to my environment, and that does affect me psychologically. Likely I was bitten by a tick, but also fell about 20 feet onto my head, and other traumas.

There is a high probability that my higher order cognitive function will fail, so I have been transferring information to my lower order cognitive faculties. I pushed myself one time until I believe an aneurism burst in my brain, which was extremely painful. It felt like liquid seeping into my brain and then being tunneled by borrowing worms. I lost my ability to think in words, and everything required a lot of focus.

I struggle to sleep, the longest period was 16 years straight. I managed to reduce the pain and inflammation, so now it's not so 24/7.

One thing is, that there are a lot of benefits, for me anyways. I see things that nobody else sees, and know how to use it practically. Sometimes I release my mind and allow it to go free, then bring it back into order. It's like going from being an animal, to human, to alien.

I switch between INTP, INTJ, and even Extraverted types when I need to. Mostly, I either try to adapt to my environment, react to it, or shut it out entirely. I absorb people's energies which is like empathy but then those energies conflict with each other, which is where disorder originates. It's also useful with computers, because they are made up of energy, and I can empathize and find out where there is stress in the system. People are affected by computers, so if I can reduce friction in a system, the end user experiences less stress. One day with advancements in AI, there might be a job for me, but right now I'm just a run-of-the-mill human being like the rest of us.

 

[baccheion]

I have something. Some would say it's paranoid schizophrenia or OCD, but I say I'm a targeted individual (ie, was sabotaged).

Hello!

I have a neurological autoimmune disorder that sucks. Symptoms are highly variable person to person, so I was wondering if there was any other INTPs here who can relate!

Megadose vitamin D. Iodine protocol. Dry fasting.

 

[moody]

I have something. Some would say it's paranoid schizophrenia or OCD, but I say I'm a targeted individual (ie, was sabotaged).

We act irrationally in response to irrational situations. I'm sorry for your syptoms, and I hope you find a way to manage them.

Hello!

I have a neurological autoimmune disorder that sucks. Symptoms are highly variable person to person, so I was wondering if there was any other INTPs here who can relate!

Megadose vitamin D. Iodine protocol. Dry fasting.[/QUOTE]


Me? Ha... Well I DO (probably) need more iodine, and definitely vitamin D, but blood tests have not been dangerously low or anything on either. But my problems are caused by a the permanent destruction of a bunch of cells in my brain that produce a very important neurotransmitter that I no longer have. Either from one of my concussions as a child that made my immune system do that, or just my immune system deciding to turn on me. ...those cells are not coming back....

 

[moody]

@computerhrx : How curious! That sounds incredibly frustrating; I hope you manage to consolidate a sustainable system of operating, and your adverse symptoms don't manage to progress...

I'm AM curious though...do you ever get snow vision, and are your headaches burning? Can they travel to your spine?

 

[travelnjones]

I am beginning to think my insomnia is a neurological issue. Stupid brain goes crazy at night with just too many thoughts.

 

[moody]

I am beginning to think my insomnia is a neurological issue. Stupid brain goes crazy at night with just too many thoughts.

Everything is neurological. As to the cause, it's different for everyone. Insomnia has MANY sources. A lot of insomia stems from some form of anxiety; right now I believe anxiety in itself is considered psychological. I've met many anxious types who suffer from insomnia.
This is just MY theory...based on my experiences and observations, I think being unable to tame your thoughts and thus have insomnia COULD BE due to slightly early activation of REM cells when you tire but are still awake.
*Carbs or anything too dense too close to "bedtime" can make insomnia worse, as well as having life style that's to sedentary. (Hate to be "that" guy, and I'm sure you've heard that before, but just a couple simple things that could help a debilitating problem).

 

[computerhxr]

@computerhrx : How curious! That sounds incredibly frustrating; I hope you manage to consolidate a sustainable system of operating, and your adverse symptoms don't manage to progress...

Thanks!

I'm concerned that my nervous system is deteriorating, and that my brain is going with it, along with the organs that depend on its function.

I have been using it as an opportunity to study disease, and come up with solutions. Like you said, exercise, a healthy diet, and a healrhy environment are key.

I'm AM curious though...do you ever get snow vision, and are your headaches burning? Can they travel to your spine?

Yes, I get snow vision but it's really mild. I only notice it when I stare up at the sky, or solid surfaces. It looks like tiny little particles refracting light. Sometimes I see sparks and flashes of light.

This is going to sound odd, but when I close my eyes at night, I can see granite countertops like floating static or visual snow. Maybe the signals are crossed with electromagnetic sense perception?

Everything was burning before, skin, joints, muscles, lungs, and especially my spine and head. Breathing, eating, moving, everything would aggravate the burning. When I closed my eyes at night, it was like looking into a lightbulb. I couldn't sleep. If something that I ate it drank aggravated the inflammation, my intestines would shut down. Everything made me sick and made the cronic migraine worse.

Now, I just have migraines, sharp nerve pain down my spine, arms, and legs. My immune system is pretty good. My vision is good. My memory and brain function have improved. I sleep but it's very lucid and I'm super aware of my surroundings. I'm happy and I have a lot to be greatful for.

 

[computerhxr]

[...] But my problems are caused by a the permanent destruction of a bunch of cells in my brain that produce a very important neurotransmitter that I no longer have. Either from one of my concussions as a child that made my immune system do that, or just my immune system deciding to turn on me. ...those cells are not coming back....

What neurotrandmitter and part of your brain is not functioning properly?

Seriously though, you're an advanced machine, don't give up on reviving or compensating for the damaged tissue.

---
I felt exactly the part of my brain as it was shutting down. See the part labeled 'speech center' in the image below? That was the epicenter, and the first thing to go was my speech. They say you can't feel your brain, but that's bullshit. Basically the whole top left region of my brain shut down, along with the same area on the right. I also felt something split in two right down the center. The back and the core of my brain held up until I recovered.

 

[moody]

@computerhxr : I've gotten very mild snow vision my entire life; though they don't know the cause of snow vision thus far, it's been associated with the activity in REM cells. My "missing neurotransmitter" gives away my diagnosis. Not that I'm self-conscious about it or anything, just that I tend to shy away from giving bold or defining details online. Though...paranoia, I think, is exasperated exasperated by my "condition."

I have been using it as an opportunity to study disease, and come up with solutions. Like you said, exercise, a healthy diet, and a healrhy environment are key.

I totally understand. I've treated myself a little like a research project. It would be...extraordinarily laborious to explain the way I go about it....and from what you've said, I know it would be the same for you as well. Best way I can describe it is a 3D conspiracy map in my head, with filled away dead ends and color-coded strings leading from one "thing" to another as I sort out what's what and what effects what and how that effects what.

This is going to sound odd, but when I close my eyes at night, I can see granite countertops like floating static or visual snow. Maybe the signals are crossed with electromagnetic sense perception?

Not odd at all. Happens to me every time I close my eyes. Btw, you will probably be able to shift and move it at will if you imagine it doing so. If you can do that, you probably also can imagine yourself traveling in certain directions if you kinesthetically imagine you're doing so. If you get more advanced at this, you can imagine your limbs extending out of your body, and if you have a mental image of what the room looks like, you can walk around. But this is what causes me the intesnse buringing headaches and i usually start seeing red flash before my eyes, so do at your own risk! This is REM, my friend, this is REM. It's like we're always high! Or so I'm told. I don't really know because I'm always like this.

Sometimes I see flashes of bright color paired with sounds. Sometimes I get "banging head syndrom" and I can't stop hearing impossibly load things. If I'm tired, the white noise around me will bend to create a version of whatever was the last song stuck in my head. It infuriates me when it's not in the right key, or out of tune, because the pitches of the things around me aren't the same as the song!

Everything was burning before, skin, joints, muscles, lungs, and especially my spine and head. Breathing, eating, moving, everything would aggravate the burning. When I closed my eyes at night, it was like looking into a lightbulb. I couldn't sleep. If something that I ate it drank aggravated the inflammation, my intestines would shut down. Everything made me sick and made the cronic migraine worse.

I'm unsure if this is what I've experienced. BUT. I can tell you I've experienced things that can be described very similarly. My personal theories on this sort of phenomenon....

REM cells opporate in the occipital plate, around and in the visial cortex. There's a connection with REM cells and parkinson's disease. I think you would benefit by referring to this article: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4371408/
In short, this is a finding on an extremely strong correlation between the development of parkinsons disease following the onset of idiopathic REM sleep behavior disorder. This may provide you with some extrememly insightful information you might be looking for.

When our bodies are in sleep mode, our bodies and frontal cortex is paralyzed. When there's a disturbance in this (I forget this exact biological function...), sometimes our bodies aren't properly paralyzed when we're asleep or we aren't quite asleep when our bodies are paralyzed. Two common manifestations of this are sleep walking and sleep paralysis, but there is a large gray area that remains too ellusive to define with current knowledge. Though I spend quite a lot of time in this area!

It's imporant to note: in sleep paralysis (which I have about 2+ times a day), you're frontal cortex is shut down. So NO language or logical reasoning fo you! All responses come from the amygdala and lymbic system.

In sleep paralysis, I've had similar experiences of the buringing pain you've mentioned. When I'm get a little tired and I suspect some activation in my REM cells, I get a burning headache on the top of my head, and inbetween my eyebrows. At my worst, it has felt like my head is going to split open if I don't go to sleep.

(You can feel the parts of your brain giving up? Is it a fuzzy sensation like a limb falling asleep?)

If there's something tricking out your waking-awake regulation, then that may just explain why you loose the ability to think and problem solve in words. You may be literally feeling the REM cells trying to compensate throughout your brain, but just causing you pain because it's sending conflcting signals throughout your nerves. Who know! These are just spectulations of mine based off of my specuations of myself. But I definately think it's worth thinking about and considereing. Not being able to sleep for that long does it's own damage, mainly to your systems of regulation.

Stay stong, fellow INTP! Also: may be worth it to look up the found connections of scizophrenia and the immune system.

 

[QuickTwist]

Not an INTP though I am on this site.

I've been clinically diagnosed with ADHD and Schizoaffective Disorder. Some Neuropsychological testing I did revealed I have acute severe anxiety and mild depression along with demoralization, percetutory identity and schizoid type personality characteristics.

 

[computerhxr]

@moody

*** The following is something that I would normally be too paranoid to express. I know people can figure out who I am, where I live, and use this against me. I choose not to live my life in fear, but to live an authentic life that is in alignment with my self, and with God. *** Please do not try this at home kids. ***

I self-induced a schizophrenia intentionally. It started when I started having visions of the future. With everything that was happening in the world, I saw it as an opportunity. I wouldn't recommend it, because it almost killed me.

First, let me tell you why I felt that it was important for me to do. I felt that the world was experiencing a schizophrenia, and that if I could create a cure for myself, then I could cure others and help bring the world into order.

Maybe I have always had schizophrenia, but I rationalized everything and lived a stoic lifestyle. Growing up, I used to talk to plants, animals, insects, and they would speak to me. They made sense to me and I understood what they were telling me. People on the other hand seemed crazy and chaotic, which I couldn't understand. The older that I got, the more I tried to understand people, and the more I ignored what nature was telling me.

If you look up the etymology of schizophrenia, here's what it says: "early 20th century: modern Latin, from Greek skhizein ‘to split’ + phrēn ‘mind.’"

I took the opinion of the left and the right, from extreme to extreme, and allowed information to flow freely into my mind. I believe that I am the richest and wealthiest person on the planet, and at the same time, I believe that my liabilities are so extreme that I am also the poorest. I'm an atheist, and I believe in God.

My mind split into pieces, each part in conflict with the others. It was like poking a beehive, and releasing a swarm, my mind was buzzing. My paranoia and delusions were extreme at this point. I thought that I was being hunted for sport, I was being spied on, that I was the chosen leader of the world, and that I invented thousands of things that were created on my behalf. Weird shit like that.

The speech center of my brain came under attack. This is where that internal voice comes from, the one that never shuts up. Well, they shut him up, and I got to experience what it was like to live without words.

I did everything from building an Ark, visiting Heaven, communicating with the dead, speaking to God, and downloading images that He gifted to me. I chose judgement, a trial by fire, and was accepted into Heaven. I raised and trained armies in other dimensions, built traps, conduits, trip-wires, and war machines, all of which are proxies beyond what we call reality. I even made an agreement with God to save the world and hold the gates of Heaven open, but in return I have to spend an eternity in Hell.

In spite of all of this, I am able to bring my mind back into order. I struggled a lot with memory, and now my memory is stronger than ever. I couldn't feel fear or excitement, and now I feel both. That voice that told me what I think, now is under my control and authority. I went from being a turbulent INTJ, to being an assertive INTJ.

My immune system is has improved dramatically. I ate a bar and broke out in hives, blurred vision, lack of oxygen, and in less than an hour my body took care of it and it cleared instantly. People catch colds and flu's that they are calling 'super' because people get extremely sick for extended periods of time, and I catch them for a few hours. I'm working on the cure for diabetes, lyme disease, Parkinson, anxiety, depression, heart disease, cancer, autism, and a whole slew of other illnesses that plague society. Now, I don't know if I have any of these things as I've never been diagnosed, but that is the mission that I set my body to figure out.

So, anyways, I know the difference between rational reality and delusions, so I can separate the two. I set the date of January 14th, 2019 (orthodox new year) to have my mind back under control. My intention is to keep the schizophrenia in contrast to my stable mind, whereby creating a 3rd mind as a product of the differences between the two. Basically, I just call it my creative mind, my rational mind, and my 3rd eye.

After all of this, I do believe in Christ, God, Heaven, and Hell. Jesus is the path to Heaven, or God's judgement will make that determination for you. God is an Architect, Engineer, Author, and Scientist. He just wants peace on Earth, Love, Understanding, and the Freedom to live your life. That is my opinion and what I want for us as well.

Now you know. I'm crazy, and want the best for everyone and everything. Or maybe I'm the only sane person on the planet? lol

 

[moody]

@computerhrx : Crazy is a cruel word. It sounds like you’ve been through a lot; I wish you peace one day. (I understand your paninoia...if it’s any condolence, I highly doubt anyone would be motivated to track down who you are irl. It is and INTP forum, after all! Who are is less inportant than what you say).
They say that if you loose one of your senses, your other senses become stronger to compensate. I think is also true for the senses we use in discerning our reality. It is hard when you have something altering with your perception or your internal responses to your environment. Your realization of the world is the one thing no one else will ever be privy to, so anything that further encodes you’re communication or perception will conflict with the way you interact and respond to socialization.
Hallucinations can be the worst effing things...I’ve never had them awake, but i have hallogenic hallucinations while half asleep. They take any little anxiety, suspicion, subconscious thought or feeling and twist it in some creepy way, and THEN it keep saying getting shoved in your face over and over and over again. I swear, that crap can really give a person some form of PTSD if it’s bad enough. Even though they never happened when I was awake, it was like I was inside a glass bottle for hours after getting out of one.
I think the two most important things are having a strong sense of who you are, and like yourself described, a systematic series of mental checks on yourself (the logician in you) that help you reason what’s real and not. Of course, my probables are different than yours, and I don’t have a religion to help define me and what I know to be true. But I can relate to that in the way that I create mental constants for myself, collecting things I can rely on to be “fundamental facts,” which help me keep my head on in rough times and to understand the world. (For example: humans’s beliefs are often irrational, but the reasons for having them never are).
People often are consciously aware of how irrational they are until they get tested on WHY they think of that; a lot of people just consciously reject information they cannot handle because it conflicts too much with who they think they are and reality based on that. I think what you discribe is a conscious consolidation of a process that is unconscious for other people, and thuan they have less control over. Again, I am not exactly the same, but I can understand due to the slightly similar way I’ve learned to process and consolodate information before I knew anything was “wrong” with me. It gives you insight on the way information processing works in ways that I guess other people don’t experience too often. It’s hard to know what’s “normal” and not, because we’re always our own example so of normal!

 

[computerhxr]

@moody

Thanks, I appreciate your understanding!

You're right about having a strong sense of self. I released it for a while, but now I'm back!

I agree with you about not being able to handle the dissonance. People do a lot to protect their beliefs, and I can see why. PTSD, schizophrenia, and other disorders are a beast to tame.

If this helps, this is how I think of it. Your mind is like a raw lump of clay on a wheel. Outside influence, other people, news, and social media can leave craters, throwing it out of balance. When you take hold of the clay, it thrashes you around until you center the mass. Once it's under your control, you can shape it into a vessel of your design.

We form neurosis in an attempt to balance our minds. Your hallucinations are manifestations of unchecked balances. You can absorb them into your conscious, but they throw your wheel out of balance. Maybe a false belief that you've allowed society to define for you.

I had a conversation with a local baker, who made doughnuts. I told him that his doughnuts were the best that I ever had, and I meant it, they are delicious. He told me that the secret to good doughnuts is to start with good ingredients. The other doughnut shops slather them with frosting to make up for the inferior flour they use to make the dough. Middle-out doughnut philosophy.

Middle-out is the approach that I've used to bring my mind back into order. Starting with my sense of self. Everything else will follow suit.

Ask yourself, what is my purpose? That's a good place to start. You're a Master of your own design, make it a good one!