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A Never-Ending Poem

Wolfpine

Traveler
Local time
Today 7:14 AM
Joined
Dec 5, 2010
Messages
25
---
Respond with a stanza or two that you feel complements the poem in the post above. You may, but do not have to, look at previous posts to get an idea. Just write whatever comes to mind; feel free to be random, as long as your post and the one above can be related. I'll start.

In the beginning
Some kind of fortune
Some wild and blue-eyed reason
Gave no explanation
 

Nocturne

Vesper.
Local time
Today 4:14 AM
Joined
Nov 25, 2010
Messages
297
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Location
Veh. Not telling.
Words of hope brought no comfort
Praises of life and love meant nothing
And so, the way of kindness faded
Until there were nothing left but darkness,
Pitch black darkness.
 

Auburn

Luftschloss Schöpfer
Local time
Today 4:14 AM
Joined
Sep 26, 2008
Messages
2,298
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Death with no reason
Insatiable remorse..
Blood stained memories

Carving fissures in her skull

Panic and wailing
Irreversible past
All is oblivion, all is lost

Whispers for mercy, prayer for death..
 

CoryJames

Banned
Local time
Today 7:14 AM
Joined
Apr 23, 2010
Messages
914
---
Location
Massachusetts
A single note is struck,
feeble, timorous, a lone spark
but welcoming a chord.
So the point of light expands,
chasing shadows from the corners.
 

Wolfpine

Traveler
Local time
Today 7:14 AM
Joined
Dec 5, 2010
Messages
25
---
It rises in frequency and wonder
Like tinnitus, but beautiful, a mistiest haze
The hint of something grand
For this note of hope to save
 

EvilScientist Trainee

Science Advisor
Local time
Today 9:14 AM
Joined
Oct 7, 2010
Messages
393
---
Location
Evil Island #43
But as a symphony on a note
The shadow is alone
Wondering why they're gone
He had to learn how to cope
 

Wolfpine

Traveler
Local time
Today 7:14 AM
Joined
Dec 5, 2010
Messages
25
---
And as music lies in a feeble qualia
Of near-incomprehensible nature
He can't help but fall
Into loneliness, into a hell of reason
 

Auburn

Luftschloss Schöpfer
Local time
Today 4:14 AM
Joined
Sep 26, 2008
Messages
2,298
---
charcoal rings around his eyes
hollow iris, gates to the heart
expanding, dialating..

dry wells of hope
in their thirst, slowly devour the dark
in all it's pain, the raw helplessness
and liquid panic filling the caverns of his mind

dripping..
pouring..
 

bleepbloop

Member
Local time
Today 12:14 PM
Joined
Nov 25, 2010
Messages
34
---
Location
Pretzel Town
Ceramic accords brokered by the fire;
enable plug-and-play action-items.
Recontextualize one-to-one e-tailers.
Take back the White House.



 

indigofireflies

Observer of things
Local time
Today 7:14 AM
Joined
Dec 1, 2010
Messages
146
---
Location
Galifrey
Veins of ice couple her wrists
as they flex and her frequency jump-starts
as the keys are played and the mice are dancing
and she closes her eyes as the discourse of the world consumes her.
 

Wolfpine

Traveler
Local time
Today 7:14 AM
Joined
Dec 5, 2010
Messages
25
---
Thus far #1

So, here's what we have thus far:

~~~

In the beginning
Some kind of fortune
Some wild and blue-eyed reason
Gave no explanation

Words of hope brought no comfort
Praises of life and love meant nothing
And so, the way of kindness faded
Until there were nothing left but darkness,
Pitch black darkness.

Death with no reason
Insatiable remorse..
Blood stained memories
Carving fissures in her skull

Panic and wailing
Irreversible past
All is oblivion, all is lost

Whispers for mercy, prayer for death..

A single note is struck,
feeble, timorous, a lone spark
but welcoming a chord.
So the point of light expands,
chasing shadows from the corners.

It rises in frequency and wonder
Like tinnitus, but beautiful, a mistiest haze
The hint of something grand
For this note of hope to save

But as a symphony on a note
The shadow is alone
Wondering why they're gone
He had to learn how to cope

And as music lies in a feeble qualia
Of near-incomprehensible nature
He can't help but fall
Into loneliness, into a hell of reason

charcoal rings around his eyes
hollow iris, gates to the heart
expanding, dilating..

dry wells of hope
in their thirst, slowly devour the dark
in all it's pain, the raw helplessness
and liquid panic filling the caverns of his mind

dripping..
pouring..

Ceramic accords brokered by the fire;
enable plug-and-play action-items.
Recontextualize one-to-one e-tailers.
Take back the White House.

Veins of ice couple her wrists
as they flex and her frequency jump-starts
as the keys are played and the mice are dancing
and she closes her eyes as the discourse of the world consumes her.


~~~

My interpretation is as follows:

1) Music is a recurring symbol of the way death is experienced.
2) Our protagonist is dying, maybe killing him/herself.
3) Our protagonist is severely gender confused.
4) The first two stanzas may be its reasoning for killing itself.
5) The rest of the poem is the actual experience of death - from euphoria to nothingness.
6) The last two stanzas make no fucking sense whatsoever. (Though maybe the last is its revival? Defibrillators?)

This is fun. I like what we have so far!

Though it goes against the title, we could start over if you guys are satisfied. Or just continue. Next post may either begin a new poem or continue the above.
 

indigofireflies

Observer of things
Local time
Today 7:14 AM
Joined
Dec 1, 2010
Messages
146
---
Location
Galifrey
Skeletons of trees echo a lover's last breath
while femme fatale snow piles in heaps on their graves
and I stand, ever-watching, as laughter bubbles past my lips
fools they were -- and fools they died.
 

CoryJames

Banned
Local time
Today 7:14 AM
Joined
Apr 23, 2010
Messages
914
---
Location
Massachusetts
Sorry to interrupt the awesome thread, but why the hell are we all so dark and troubled? I myself tried to turn the tide towards the positive, but it was immediately overridden by another wave of melancholy.
 

Wolfpine

Traveler
Local time
Today 7:14 AM
Joined
Dec 5, 2010
Messages
25
---
Sorry to interrupt the awesome thread, but why the hell are we all so dark and troubled? I myself tried to turn the tide towards the positive, but it was immediately overridden by another wave of melancholy.

I KNOW! Hey, to be fair, I kept it light right after you, but then it got dragged down again. I showed this to a friend, who immediately questioned the sanity of you people.

Oh, for future reference, normal posts are fine - just put poem additions in italics.

EDIT: Moving on:

Skeletons of trees echo a lover's last breath
while femme fatale snow piles in heaps on their graves
and I stand, ever-watching, as laughter bubbles past my lips
fools they were -- and fools they died.

Sweet in body and sick in mind.

Then, with only my lantern
and a Lovecraftian knowledge of the darkness
I went forward, inward, plunging ever deeper
Into the black, black night

I wouldn't admit to trembling
But truly I was single-minded
Nothing would deter me, nothing keep me
I, the followed, and the following
 

FearDunn

as Gaeilge
Local time
Today 7:14 AM
Joined
Dec 5, 2010
Messages
41
---
Now standing in canyons of convolution
You call out for solution
Only echoes, resounding confusion
In silence, I listen
Knowledge built on whispers of wisdom
Transcends the wall of this static pollution
 

Admirable Complexities

is a paradox for the non-INTP.
Local time
Today 6:14 AM
Joined
Nov 18, 2010
Messages
61
---
Location
Texas
How epic a story this trail of tales tells,
Ignoring the darkness each addition entails.
Through waters of depression, we smile at our sails,
On the river of Styx while drifting to hell.

Wait! What's this? A change in emotion?
Heresy to INTP devotion!
MBTI, clearly it states
That our worlds should be filled with loneliness; hate.
Yet one steps up to ignite a commotion:

"Why so gloomy?" CoryJames inquires,
"Cause that's how we do!" says I, the Admired.
"But maybe, just maybe, there's hope for a change,
As I lighten the mood with these Seuss-like proclaims!"

I leave you deliberately, with lack of formation
Symbolically saying, "Please, less complication."
 

Wolfpine

Traveler
Local time
Today 7:14 AM
Joined
Dec 5, 2010
Messages
25
---
How epic a story this trail of tales tells,
Ignoring the darkness each addition entails.
Through waters of depression, we smile at our sails,
On the river of Styx while drifting to hell.

Wait! What's this? A change in emotion?
Heresy to INTP devotion!
MBTI, clearly it states
That our worlds should be filled with loneliness; hate.
Yet one steps up to ignite a commotion:

"Why so gloomy?" CoryJames inquires,
"Cause that's how we do!" says I, the Admired.
"But maybe, just maybe, there's hope for a change,
As I lighten the mood with these Seuss-like proclaims!"

I leave you deliberately, with lack of formation
Symbolically saying, "Please, less complication."

The irony in this is heavy, dripping, and poisonous. A meta-poem on poems? I commend your skill in writing this, but let's scratch it from the poem that's being worked on...

Most recent excerpt is:

Now standing in canyons of convolution
You call out for solution
Only echoes, resounding confusion
In silence, I listen
Knowledge built on whispers of wisdom
Transcends the wall of this static pollution
 

EvilScientist Trainee

Science Advisor
Local time
Today 9:14 AM
Joined
Oct 7, 2010
Messages
393
---
Location
Evil Island #43
*Pausing the poem*

I'm sure we can go all free style if we like, but I feel a lack of structure in the poem. What's the structure? ABBA. AABB,ABAB?

*Returning to the poem*

Are we doomed to hide?
Who are those we fight?
In despair, all words seem vain
Die, monsters made of clay!
 

Admirable Complexities

is a paradox for the non-INTP.
Local time
Today 6:14 AM
Joined
Nov 18, 2010
Messages
61
---
Location
Texas
*Pausing the poem*
I'm sure we can go all free style if we like, but I feel a lack of structure in the poem. What's the structure? ABBA. AABB,ABAB?

If you're referring to mine, the last two lines answer your question.

"Lack of formation" (structure)
 

Wolfpine

Traveler
Local time
Today 7:14 AM
Joined
Dec 5, 2010
Messages
25
---
I was refering to the poem as a whole. But I see we will be going with no formation. It's more comfortable, really.

Yeah, no formation. Each poster can rhyme how he/she likes or not at all.
 

Admirable Complexities

is a paradox for the non-INTP.
Local time
Today 6:14 AM
Joined
Nov 18, 2010
Messages
61
---
Location
Texas

Omelas

is Walking
Local time
Today 6:14 AM
Joined
Dec 10, 2010
Messages
31
---
Location
United States of America
Virtuous, though you knew it;
Vicious, only if unseen. Now,
Who will walk with me?
 

Wolfpine

Traveler
Local time
Today 7:14 AM
Joined
Dec 5, 2010
Messages
25
---
God dammit, fine. Look what you've done, Admiral...

Yet it is a cycle
One so, by nature,
That it can be spoken of in poem

FearDunn or has fear just begun?
Is this the correct manner of action?
Should we retain a semblance of pretentiousity?
Or use real words, in a real setting?

We, as INTP
Directly cut to the core, but see
Meta-poetry fares less aesthetically
And we find ourselves in monotonous simplicity
 

Omelas

is Walking
Local time
Today 6:14 AM
Joined
Dec 10, 2010
Messages
31
---
Location
United States of America
Never heard of the sun
Until ringing peels shot through dreams
The INTP awakens; Rises,
Realizes, all has been wrong.
 

Omelas

is Walking
Local time
Today 6:14 AM
Joined
Dec 10, 2010
Messages
31
---
Location
United States of America
But who are they?
Obvious, oblivious, obfusicate...
I'd lie in order to know:
who will have to pay?
 

FearDunn

as Gaeilge
Local time
Today 7:14 AM
Joined
Dec 5, 2010
Messages
41
---
Omission retraction
Awaiting progression
A simple submission
Warrants inaction
:rip:
 

ijustprotectedmyidentity

Active Member
Local time
Today 12:14 PM
Joined
Dec 17, 2009
Messages
103
---
Location
in theory
ahhaha fear dunn i think you ended the poem.

ommision retraction yes ppl are typign words and deleting them
cuz ur goethe skills pwned all of us
 

FearDunn

as Gaeilge
Local time
Today 7:14 AM
Joined
Dec 5, 2010
Messages
41
---
ijustprotectedmyidentity,
’twas simply soliloquy.
Reflecting on conflicting
evolutionary paths
Wolfpine's challenge to uplift
lead to subsidence and wrath.
 
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