When will this agony end?

[Rudolph Mondal]

So I recently figured out that I'm actually an INFP after learning more about the differences between Ti and Fi and being more honest with myself. All along I thought that I was an INTP probably because all the descriptions of INFPs I read didn't gel with me entirely because I don't see myself as an arty person and also because I was actually bluffing on all the personality tests without realizing it because I was filling in the tests as what I'd like them to see me as rather than who I actually am.

So I'm apparently an INFP. Most of my actions are value-centered and I do not possess a logically consistent core. I'm fickle-minded, tend to dwell on my emotions a lot and basically do things based on what my emotions tell me. Yes, I feel that I'm in search of who I am which I heard is the quintessential quest for INFPs. However, I do not possess any artistic talent but I guess it's really because I never put effort into anything and basically run out of motivation after a few days or so or feel some compulsion to explore other things.

I don't know what my interests are. Nothing, really, other than wanting to figure out who I am. What's the only thing that keeps me moving. The chance to reflect on these days some time in the future so I can better understand who I am and gauge how much I've grown.

I lie to myself a lot. I tell myself that I'm interested in math or cognitive science but I'm not really because I don't spend all of my time learning those subjects. Or maybe I am interested sometimes but most of the time, the motivation simply isn't there and everything feels like a chore.

I want to make something out of my life, you know? I don't want to be someone who just rots away. I don't want to be some plain office worker either. I want to matter to people. But more importantly, I want to matter to myself. I want to be someone I'd be proud of.

But what, oh what can I do? Nothing interests me long enough. I had dreams of becoming a writer but I can't write for the love of oranges. I've also had dreams of becoming a philosopher or a psychologist or a mathematician or a physicist but you know, I can't pursue them because I simply don't possess enough interest, motivation or ambition to get there. So what do I do now?

I fantasize a lot. I fantasize about being intelligent and being passionate about math and physics and cognitive science and philosophy. About learning how the world works, basically. Investigating the innermost secrets if you will of reality. But those are mere fantasies. I do get motivation from my fantasies though. At most it'd last for a few weeks especially if it's the holiday period. But sooner or later reality hits home and I realize how distant the person in my fantasies is from me as I am and I get upset.

I can't fantasize for very long nowadays because there's school and stuff. But that also means that I get upset a lot because I can't get enough motivation (which I'd get from fantasizing) to be interested in anything.

But you know, there are times when I'm genuinely interested in math or physics or whatever. Really really interested. It just doesn't last.

I also have problems with people in my university. They're so different from me. I can't qualify exactly how they are different from me but it's an intuitive feeling. I feel extremely alienated from them. After every class ends I have to go outside for a walk because being in the midst of all my schoolmates is so damn suffocating. It's a chore going to university. It's a chore being stuck in the system I am stuck in.

Today was an okay sort of day. A Sunday so there wasn't any school. I finished pretty much all of my homework so I feel good now. Better, I mean. Yet, the thought that there's school tomorrow casts a shadow on my spirits. It makes me feel awful again. It's night-time here. In 8.5 hours time I'll be in school again, attending classes in the midst of all the people. It's a depressing thought.

I'm writing all of this to reach out to someone. I can't reach out to my parents because they get upset when I'm like this and I don't really have friends I'm so close with that I can tell them all of this stuff. Also, I don't want to pester anyone in particular so I thought the forum would be good.

Gaah. Life is a pain. Just this afternoon I was watching talks on AGI and had ambitions to get a Phd in AGI. Things have changed drastically in the intervening hours. I no longer have that sort of motivation or interest. I'm leaning more towards human affairs now. I want to read all the great works of fiction that reveal so much about the human condition.

I've been upset for 7 weeks so far. Basically since school started there hasn't been a single day when I felt happy or contended or satisfied for the entire duration of the day. Moments of happiness are fleeting. Moments of sadness and frustration are long and draining.

That's all I'm going to write for now.

NOTE: I'm not looking for advice. I'm merely looking for a means to be heard. I'd appreciate comments/advice though.

 

[Cherry Cola]

dude story of my life, except I have friends and parents who get this unlike you : /

feel for ya

Remember there are other ways to learn than to directly study subjects, literature makes you smarter for instance, movies and animes. Don't try to force yourself to enjoy stuff you hate, go for the things you enjoy and analyze those. So long as you think about what you're reading and watching you'll learn plenty.

 

[Rudolph Mondal]

I genuinely fear that I'm going to end up a wastrel and nothing good's going to come out of me. Gaah.

 

[Rudolph Mondal]

dude story of my life, except I have friends and parents who get this unlike you : /

feel for ya

Remember there are other ways to learn than to directly study subjects, literature makes you smarter for instance, movies and animes. Don't try to force yourself to enjoy stuff you hate, go for the things you enjoy and analyze those. So long as you think about what you're reading and watching you'll learn plenty.

Thanks. I don't hate stuff like math and physics. I genuinely find it interesting but most of the time I'm too depressed to follow through.

What am I like when I'm upset? Well, all I do is read fiction or philosophy, watch emotional films and listen to emotional songs.

You're right that one learns plenty from literature by thinking about it but the problem with me is that I've always viewed mathematics and mathematicians really highly and had ambitions of becoming one myself. It's a fantasy of sorts that I'd never get to fulfill.

 

[wilsonwatson]

Jeez you hit a nerve, man. I feel exactly the same way, except that I also have a passion for the arts. I feel like I'm moderately talented in several things, but not sufficiently talented in any one thing.

I don't know what advice to give you, because I'm pretty much in the same boat. Good luck, I'll tell you if I figure out the secret to life.

Seriously, good luck.

 

[Vict]

Soon enough.

 

[Teax]

I hear ya. the system sucks indeed. look for shortcuts

motivation is like spilled water soaking through sand. imagine the unattaibale and let the passion soak to the details from there.

"I do get motivation from my fantasies though."
that's the key
"I can't fantasize for very long nowadays..."
that's the door

 

[StevenM]

Today was an okay sort of day. A Sunday so there wasn't any school. I finished pretty much all of my homework so I feel good now. Better, I mean.

That right there deserves a pat on the back. If you do end up finishing school with some kind of degree, that deserves quite a good amount of respect in my books.
Just having the motivation to finish up your homework for this day is something to be proud of. Honestly.

Yet, the thought that there's school tomorrow casts a shadow on my spirits. It makes me feel awful again. It's night-time here. In 8.5 hours time I'll be in school again, attending classes in the midst of all the people. It's a depressing thought.

This speaks of a bad case of social anxiety. Didn't mean to diagnose or nothing, but it is something that tons of people have, including myself. Personally, I muster up the courage to purposefully put myself in crowds, just to get a knack of dealing with the fear. Just like anything, over time, a person can get desensitized and jaded to the feeling. Fears grow when you avoid them.

I wish you luck in your endeavors.

 

[Direwolf]

If timr goes quickly while your doing something chances are you probably subconciously like doing it. So... Do more of that. If you mean when will school end, depends if you want uni or college or whatever. If your worried nothing good will come out of you, become an organ doner, than your guaranteed to have something good come out of you.

Otherwise good luck mate

 

[dark+matters]

I think this is a video worth watching about mistyping oneself. I still can't tell if I'm an NF or an NT, even if I keep testing as an INTP. When I was trying to be an artist, I'd usually test as an INFP. When I had to make plans and organize people, etc., I'd test as INTJ (which is 90% unlikely).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gWmBKmkjo4o

 

[nanook]

being intp does not imply digging math, but being enneagram five implies trying to escape from exposure to the boundless quality of life by becoming super intellectualized. interest in sciency subjects feel inauthentic, because the driving motivation of the interest is not to actually know everything (which would be an inherently extroverted fantasy), but to feel less and be in more control of what one has to feel and experience. unfortunately the misguided urge to escape creates agony. take an interest in the human condition instead of science, it can help to tame the enneagram passion problem while also making the best out of it's skill. find your unique authentic and creative approach to exploring this subject, don't follow a particular school. relate every subject you take interest in to your subject. can you use a math principle as a mind map for how you organize your life? can you figure out some order in your soul by projecting it onto principles of sacred geometry? don't try to become an extrovert (objective type).

 

[Grayman]

I think this is a video worth watching about mistyping oneself. I still can't tell if I'm an NF or an NT, even if I keep testing as an INTP. When I was trying to be an artist, I'd usually test as an INFP. When I had to make plans and organize people, etc., I'd test as INTJ (which is 90% unlikely).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gWmBKmkjo4o

watched 1/4 of it and then I started skipping to various sections to the end but found that everything was 1000 ways to say a person is mistyping because their are ashamed. I personally am no longer ashamed of my INFP ism.

 

[dark+matters]

I watched 1/4 of it and then I started skipping to various sections to the end but found that everything was 1000 ways to say a person is mistyping because their are ashamed. I personally am no longer ashamed of my INFP ism.

Yes, that's basically his premise. Of course, I'm sure that shame isn't at all the only reason for mistyping, but the video did ring true for me, personally, on many levels. In my own case of being confused about type, I think that I would often skew my test answers towards INFP, because my conceptions of NF (warm, friendly, harmless, sweet) was what I wanted to be seen as, especially as a woman, and especially, especially as someone trying to pursue a career in the arts.

Being involved in the arts, over the course of my life, I've consistently been punished for showing any signs of "calculatedness," "coldness," or "being arrogant," or "unempathetic," because of the people I spent time with who... don't really seem to get NTs... at all. This is happening to me right now in school as well. In my artistic classes, I'm still getting brutally attacked for my desire to talk about math, the sciences, sociology, ethics, psychology, law, philosophy- or any system affecting us that catches my interest. It's perceived very, very inaccurately by the kinds of people I've been bumping up against in non-math classes. I still consistently get attacked for my joy of analysis by people who don't have that joy, or get confused about why I like what I do. So I think that secretly wanting to hide my natural personality is a large part of why I still can't tell if I'm INFP or INTP.

In my case, it really does seem like I'm an INTP still struggling to find my place in the world. But I also think the results of testing will change depending on a person's life circumstances. I don't see any reason to be ashamed for having any kind of personality- but there are a lot of struggles we go through with accepting our identities and how others view us.

 

[Direwolf]

Yes, that's basically his premise. Of course, I'm sure that shame isn't at all the only reason for mistyping, but the video did ring true for me, personally, on many levels. In my own case of being confused about type, I think that I would often skew my test answers towards INFP, because my conceptions of NF (warm, friendly, harmless, sweet) was what I wanted to be seen as, especially as a woman, and especially, especially as someone trying to pursue a career in the arts.

Being involved in the arts, over the course of my life, I've consistently been punished for showing any signs of "calculatedness," "coldness," or "being arrogant," or "unempathetic," because of the people I spent time with who... don't really seem to get NTs... at all. This is happening to me right now in school as well. In my artistic classes, I'm still getting brutally attacked for my desire to talk about math, the sciences, sociology, ethics, psychology, law, philosophy- or any system affecting us that catches my interest. It's perceived very, very inaccurately by the kinds of people I've been bumping up against in non-math classes. I still consistently get attacked for my joy of analysis by people who don't have that joy, or get confused about why I like what I do. So I think that secretly wanting to hide my natural personality is a large part of why I still can't tell if I'm INFP or INTP.

In my case, it really does seem like I'm an INTP still struggling to find my place in the world. But I also think the results of testing will change depending on a person's life circumstances. I don't see any reason to be ashamed for having any kind of personality- but there are a lot of struggles we go through with accepting our identities and how others view us.

Indeed.
No one should ever be ashamed of their intp-ness it gives you character. I bet you they are just jealous of your mad skills.

Edit-changed p-ness to intp-ness because i believe some might get the wrong idea. I suppose the statement could still apply both ways but im suggesting intp- ness

 

[The Gopher]

Well according to that video when I thought I was an NT I said NT's can do NF stuff and when I was an NF I said the same in reverse. SO REALLY I MUST BE AN SX THAT DOES NT AND NF STUFF!

Brb finding a new S type (Not ESFP) that doesn't fit either.

 

[Grayman]

Being involved in the arts, over the course of my life, I've consistently been punished for showing any signs of "calculatedness," "coldness," or "being arrogant," or "unempathetic," because of the people I spent time with who... don't really seem to get NTs... at all. This is happening to me right now in school as well. In my artistic classes, I'm still getting brutally attacked for my desire to talk about math, the sciences, sociology, ethics, psychology, law, philosophy- or any system affecting us that catches my interest. It's perceived very, very inaccurately by the kinds of people I've been bumping up against in non-math classes. I still consistently get attacked for my joy of analysis by people who don't have that joy, or get confused about why I like what I do. So I think that secretly wanting to hide my natural personality is a large part of why I still can't tell if I'm INFP or INTP.

Many descriptions define as INFP as someone who follows their ideals and the INTP as someone who follows logic.

I was told Feelings is about values and not emotions...
Since logic needs a goal in order to have use, I have realized both follow their ideals. What is the real difference?

Eventually I picked INFP because everyone hates INFPs.

 

[nanook]

you have to understand how I and E modulate T and F or you will never know.

i can still get confused between my understanding of I and E.

and since T and F are merged, i can get confused about which one is the one that maintains the E attitude and which one maintains the I attitude.


saying that infp mistype out of shame is to suggest that "infp have reason to be ashamed about who they are, because they are only infp".

but i'd be ashamed to be ANY type, from what i have heard about those types. just the way they trash talk about infp or sensors makes them embarrassing company.

my shame prevents me from identifying with a prefabricated false self. it would be too embarrassing to be wrong about my type.

and perhaps that "shame" is an Fi thing.

either way, i'm proud about what it does for me, in cooperation with my logic, which might just be Te.

my values and logic make me strive to understand more or less all types, because i need to understand the whole mess before it's logically possible to be certain that ascribing a type to me is the right thing to do.

what if typology is inherently broken? what if there are more than four functions, or similar?

i can't just approach typology like it's an astrology and scream "yeah, that is so me" and be done with it.

to kinda contradict myself, i used to go "fuck yeah, i'm so NiFe", because it made so much sense to explain my limits, my parameters, until i became aware enough of how my own thinking works, to understand that NiFe is something in my own mind, that i have dreamt up in such a way, that it would work to give me a grip upon real traits of me. my interpretation of these functions was automatically inspired by my self-knowledge.

But my "NiFe" may be the SiTe shadow, that accompanies FiNe. Si made intuitive by Ne. Te made touchy by Fi. it may also be the SiNe and Fe of intp.

so you see, when i toggle my opinion about my type, i do not switch my persona, i toggle my interpretation of functions. it only affects the importance or place that i ascribe to various aspects of me. that's also the question of this thread. it's interesting. but it's far more important to be clear about what those aspects want from you or can do for you, than it is, to know their place in your psyche. to know whether your intuition is subjective (I) or objective (E) could be the difference between psychosis and genius. because you don't want to mistake it for the opposite. it's similar for your thinking and feeling.

 

[OrLevitate]

I'm not sure if this will help but:

There may be off kilter view of interests or 'passions' in modern culture. We live in pretty much constant entertainment and ease, pretty steadily at a high level. Finding an interest that can be translated into a career may not come easily due to that interest having to compete with the constant interests that were created purely for the sake of entertainment. If you go without many luxuries for a while, you might find things that are interesting to you that you would translate into a career; How was that bridge made? What materials, why that shape, could it be done better? What makes that insect do what it does, how does it have such a specialized form? I'm going to find out. What makes those stars different from the sun, how many might have planets, or ones like ours?
But in the presence of constant entertainment, following through on these interests doesn't really stand a chance. These things would take something that today we might call work but in yesteryear they might've called interesting.

also, there may be a cultural paradigm being fed to you that you may not fit into. That of your job being 'a passion' and, that that passion falls under one of the college system's categories of 'majors'. Maybe work is not fun ever, and that's why it's called work and they pay you for your time doing it, and time not working is where you get to do interesting things (work-life balance). Or maybe your 'passion' isn't something the college can teach you.

Maybe you're not currently good at anything. Generally when people are good at a certain skill, they become immersed in a state of 'flow' when the skill level is met with an adequate challenge.

also, you may not actually want any interests at all. Maybe you're like the guy from Office Space and seek apathy, the gift bestowed on apex predators who sleep all day. No requirements, just free time. Maybe you're in agony because you're trying to live a way that culture dictates which you don't actually care to.

 

[nanook]

for me it's also been a difficulty to sort out my traits against the aspects of my persona that are serving as empathic resonance to my parents. it appears that my mother is ennegram 9 and my father is cp6 or 8. both exist inside of me, i have become obedient to those principles. and if i seek the cognition behind that obedience, my attention will be forwarded to cognitive functions that are not my main functions. but there is also my own principle (closer to 4 or 5, depending on my interpretation of the numbers) which is based upon different functions. i'm still confused about it, so i won't lay it out. the human psyche appears to contain multiple psyches at once, which are separated through frequencies. the so called false selves are also very real, if their frequency is activated. try to type your dream characters, lol.

in this video, i hypothesize that TiFe produces a borderline like self-hating pattern. a gradient from being a keen independent conqueror over being paranoid, full of accusations, to appearing as a selfless duty-fulfiller, who is hiding thinking agendas and strategies even from himself.

and FiTe produces a shameful socially avoidant and submissive pattern. a gradient from being an innocently composed self-contained teacher of what needs to be taught over being opportunistically selectively providing the moral support requested by others to appearing as a useless schizoid black sheep, who is hiding his felt motivations and values even from himself.

the gradients from Te to Fi and from Fe to Ti must be different again, because the starting point must be assumed to be in better health than the point of disintegration.

Spoiler

http://youtu.be/CU4ISlWd4AU

 

[nanook]

i should add that the enneagram four tries to use intellectual endeavours to be interesting, to become a magnet to others. because they feel lacking if they can't get a confirmation of their value from of others. they may go as far as trying to prove superiority, just so that they are perceived as universally adorable.

this leads to a similar outcome: some interests just don't serve this unconscious enneagram motivation and the generic introverted motivation at the same time.

interests are only authentic for introverts, as long as they are really adding to the value of the subject.

the four wants to acquire wisdom that makes him valuable in a very general or universal human way. he would like to be able to provide a sticking plaster for thinkable every ouch. some of them will invent illusory shit that is universally promising and creates hope in others, who fall for it, so they consume it. but since it's illusory it does not truly serve the subject. so it feels unauthentic. less is more. if you discover whatever understanding is needed to achieve equanimity, you are adorable both to yourself and others.

the five wants the knowledge that is the most useful to the human ego, to our need to be in control of life, to be predictable of the outcome of our actions. some invent sleazy theories like the generic key to ripping off wallstreet, or earing money through file sharing. but such knowledge does not serve the subject, so it feels unauthentic. what could feel authentic would be something like the venus project, that is truly supporting human nature by introverted standards. likewise simply understanding nutrition and health.

these are all just my own perspectives on reality, i don't copy stuff straight from books. my enneagram might be a little bit different ...

 

[TheManBeyond]

According to the inferior function theory, if that's trully your weak spot, supossedly you have to feel inferior in shit where it is involved.
Example: i get really pissed off when i feel like i'm being manipulated or not worth enought to people around me. Shit like this makes me literally explode.
The other day i was told by a friend that i was his taxist, i almost threw him out of my car in the middle of the road, then i felt kinda guilty and told him to excuse, i had exagerated.
What makes me doubt about it is the fact that i can control myself once a while, i suppose is normal if not i would be a caveman, but the thing is that i always feel like shit when things like this happen.

I also have considered the fear of possibilities which could be seen as an inferior Ne trait, but i concluded that in fact most of the time those possibilities are based on facts, they follow some logical sequence and don't come out of nowhere while supossedly in the case of Si doms they seem to magically appear and disappear, forgetting about the obvious self comment: "it is less probable or almost impossible". For Fe doms, it is quite evident when they come to you and ask you for confirmation (inferior Ti): do you think professor will write the examen upside down to increase its difficulty ....? So i'm not talking about shit where you could know better and you may help, i'm talking about a tie, 0-0 situation.

For my ex gf who was clearly a Fi dom, she struggled so much with Te. Everything that needed some kind of self organization, coordination. She was trying to achieve it all the time, the faster way to get to something, the worth of it based on the time spent on it, etc but becuz she couldn't she normally explode and blame everyone else for her inhability. I think of her as a really selfish person in some ways. In fact this unhealthy state of her made me wonder if she was a disguised cop, ESTJ. It's obvious that she's not that anyway.

I'm unable to see the trueness of this inferior thing as it is like every situation leads you to get pissed off once a while, for some the preference flow is more evident i guess.

 

[Rudolph Mondal]

Thanks for all of your replies. I've read all of your replies. I have a question now though for anyone who's willing to answer. Where can I make friends with girls around my age (I'm 20) who are curious and deeply passionate about the world and themselves? Are there any here? (yes, pretty shameless, I know)

 

[The Gopher]

Groups. Groups have people in them, (like this forum) cause interaction you can pick groups to the type you want. Meeting people is super easy. It's the part after that which may be difficult. Just start talking to people as you know... friends. If you only interact with females it would just seem creepy.

 

[Jennywocky]

Thanks for all of your replies. I've read all of your replies. I have a question now though for anyone who's willing to answer. Where can I make friends with girls around my age (I'm 20) who are curious and deeply passionate about the world and themselves? Are there any here? (yes, pretty shameless, I know)

Nothing wrong with being direct.

... I don't think there are many here who fit that bill, though. You might do better at Pers Cafe for an online forum, with that demographic.

And... wait... real life... who woulda thought? But yeah, groups as Gopher says. Find groups that you think are interesting, and join them; you will find people of shared interests and potentially shared life outlook/approach.

[I know a guy that just used Mensa to find a wife (I never thought much of Mensa before)... but oh well, I guess they are broken up now so maybe that's not good advice....]

 

[Perfectly Normal Beast]

Nothing wrong with being direct.

yeah don't be shy, the forum is a great place to meet victims girls (and boys).

i think the gopher will put you in his dating database in exchange for your soul a small fee.

 

[The Gopher]

Yeah I was thinking of it but unfortunately that age group with location and speficiations run low even in my social circles.

 

[Jennywocky]

^^ The soulmonger didn't wait very long to pounce.

but yeah... demographics here in that range... meh.

 

[Cavallier]

Most of them are taken already and by other members of this forum.

I wouldn't make a deal with The Gopher. His human trafficking ring is not all it is cracked up to be.

 

[The Gopher]

Oh no I have heaps in that demographic lying around just not in Singapore. Location is almost always the limiting factor. That and willingness to talk to random people they didn't meet properly.

 

[Rudolph Mondal]

I did try groups like the philosophy group and there are girls there but I'm rather shy to speak to them in person. They did speak to me last week but it was probably a one off thing.

I don't mind if the other party's really far away. Don't want a relationship for now, just want to get to know girls my age who are more or less interested in the same things I am. I used to be able to speak to girls in a friendly manner last time but lots of things happened and I lost a lot of my self-confidence. Right now all the people I speak to outside my family are male and it kinda upsets me sometimes. But yeah, I'd like to get to know someone my age online...because I'm hopeless in person.

 

[The Gopher]

Basically your problem is self confidence. You probably don't need practice talking to females as if you are talking about a topic it's virtually the same as talking to males. Maybe pretend they are male?

... Online groups? I know you are asking about here but I don't feel like eating souls currently.

 

[Belak]

Basically your problem is self confidence. You probably don't need practice talking to females as if you are talking about a topic it's virtually the same as talking to males. Maybe pretend they are male?

... Online groups? I know you are asking about here but I don't feel like eating souls currently.

So your saying that I can go up to a girl like this.

Me:*approaches girl
Girl:Hi!, I'm (name here)
Me:Sup asshole, my names Belak
Girl: oh... That's nice... So... It's pretty warm this time of year.
Me: yah so is your mom!!! Hahahahah
Girl:yah ok...

Seems legit!

 

[dark+matters]

Hmmm! I wish I could click "like" on these answers.

 

[The Gopher]

So your saying that I can go up to a girl like this.

Me:*approaches girl
Girl:Hi!, I'm (name here)
Me:Sup asshole, my names Belak
Girl: oh... That's nice... So... It's pretty warm this time of year.
Me: yah so is your mom!!! Hahahahah
Girl:yah ok...

Seems legit!

You know most guys don't start with insults upon meeting. Even here...

But in theory yes, once you get more comfortable with each other things get more casual and to the level you both are comfortable with the interaction this can happen. Although I would point out they often insult back.

Even if they aren't the type of female to engage in the insult friends thing just treat them as guys who don't or guys who you have recently met.

 

[Belak]

You know most guys don't start with insults upon meeting. Even here...

What!!!!!!!!

Nooooooooooooooooo!!!

I've been lied to my entire life
I'll just go wallow in self reassurance that one it is normal or two, my personality trait makes this happen more often


Later assholes

 

[The Gopher]

Oh and by that I mean initial meeting not meeting in general.

 

[Belak]

Oh and by that I mean initial meeting not meeting in general.

Thank the unicorns!

I was starting to worry that I was insane!

...wait...

 

[dark+matters]

I also wanted to agree that NTs are not necessarily into math or the sciences. One of my friends was verrrrrry, very clearly an INTJ, but couldn't stand math. Instead, he concentrated all his knowledge building and refinement into language and business, and he worked on these things every single day for hours every day. Several other people I've met who seem to be NTs are into the arts or law, etc., and are not interested in math or science either. In contrast, I think that I had a really wonderful pair of math tutors who were both NFs. They really cared about my success and ability to do well.

I'm not knowledgeable about the whole Enneagram thing, but the thing about fives seems to make sense.

 

[Rudolph Mondal]

I guess I'll just retire to my cave then.

Some people are simply meant to be alone...for life.

 

[Direwolf]

Is it a nice cave? Ill come for a visit if you want. Ive always wanted a friend like me that isnt me. "Offers handshake".

 

[The Gopher]

No don't retire to a cave get self confidence and talk to real people like you used to. Alternatively find people to talk to by engaging people. Pm'ing people going on forums with the topics you like and talking to people in a personal or individual manner. You can't just say "hey is anyone out there, okay guess not" walk up to people online say hi mention they are interesting and that you want to talk. (at bare minimum)

Although caves are nice particularly if they have water in them.

 

[Rudolph Mondal]

Haha, I kinda meant that whole cave thing as a joke...I think.
Meanwhile, I got onto this meetup website and am hoping I'll have enough courage to go for a meetup or two. Gaah.

If one stays away from society because one doesn't want/need society, that's fine. I like people, most of them at least. I just don't have the guts to say hello and the demeanor I put on gives off the impression that I belong to the former category of people.

In any case, I don't know if I can just go up to someone online and say they're interesting. I don't have that much courage yet...

But one day, I just might.

 

[Direwolf]

If it helps you could copy the that phrase from somewhere else and just paste it wherever, so you dont have to write it. "Hi your interesting"