Music Immaturity

[Döden]

Does anyone else find it impossible to listen to some music because a friend got to it first?

A friend of mine is currently telling me to listen to a certain artist. When I listen to this artist I can't disentangle the association of my friend with the artist. I imagine his experience listening to it, and something about that prevents me from genuinely enjoying what I'm listening to, even if I otherwise would have loved it had I found it on my own.
I love giving recommendations but once I am on the receiving end from a close friend, I just feel kind of lame and weird listening to that music. Like I'm trespassing or something.

I realize this is an infantile attitude, but I've always been like this and I'm not sure why. What could this be a function of? Fe? Fi? Anyone else experience something similar?

 

[Words]

I've never had this experience. At least not up to this extent. Si and Ne?

 

[RubberDucky451]

I remember not listening to Sufjan Stevens because my sister discovered him first, I eventually got around to him but I took pride in not following her example.

Maybe it's because feel that their opinion isn't valid, or that their opinion doesn't apply to us. Everyone tries to find familiarity in music and the thought of another person taints that intimacy.

 

[Adymus]

There is something about music that no one you know has ever heard of that just feels right. It's like music that is just meant for you, and that is what makes it so special. I've noticed I stop liking artists if they become too well known, it is as if popularity is a sign for me to move on and find new ground. I always have to be one step ahead of everyone else.

I'd say it is an Ne thing, because I think ENTPs have this even worse than we do.

 

[Puffy]

That's pretty much why I don't like Muse. There was a guy in my year who I really didn't like and he praised them as the 'best band ever' can never get him out of my head when I hear them now

To Adymus, that's pretty much why I don't like Biffy Clyro that much anymore. I thought [and still think] that Infinity Land is an amazing album, but I don't listen to them much anymore because of their mainstream attention.

 

[pjoa09]

whoa, yeah i get it a little bit in the beginning i feel like its his music. he gave it to me. then it just sort of turns into 'our' music. until its very well popular and i feel like i am sucking music from a big corporation.

 

[ohrtonz]

Yes. When a girl tells me about something she found on the radio. But sometimes later on I listen to it by stumbling on it and find a few songs I like a bit. I think this might have something to do with someone telling you advice or asks you to do something, but you have to think about it first and process what is going on. So your right away answer is No.

 

[LTDE]

I know what you mean.

There was a song I liked by Broken Social Scene. Then I saw it on an ad for laundry detergent or something, and I didn't like it anymore. It somehow seemed tacky.

Music is a deeply personal thing, perhaps showing others feels like baring a certain part of yourself that feels awkward to show? Maybe we see it as part of our individuality?

I usually like to listen to music with headphones on.

 

[WorkInProgress]

Don't get me started on Airborne Toxic Event. They were my favorite about a year and a half before they got super famous. Now when I hear them on the radio I change the station right away

 

[Sparrow]

Don't get me started on Airborne Toxic Event. They were my favorite about a year and a half before they got super famous. Now when I hear them on the radio I change the station right away

Lol, I loved these guys as well...

 

[kantor1003]

Depends on your relationship with this person and the way he/she tipped you off about it, but it sounds to me like you want to find out things for yourself. Every time someone else gives you a suggestion you can't really dig it in because it isn't "pure" from your perspective. It causes a diminished sense of originality. I have this syndrome in many cases... and it's idiotic. If you really like it, you will eventually let yourself like it, but it must be over time. I believe it's the same thing as when a person has a strong belief in something - if that belief get's "disproved" in light of new evidence, the person usually can't let himself change his mind the same day even if he agree.. After some time passes though, he eventually will.

Maybe I'm off, but this is my perspective.

 

[Hawkeye]

It's pretty shallow if you ask me. I don't see how someone elses likes can affect your own. Perhaps I'm merely an arrogant barstool who doesn't succumb to such social dilemmas...

I like a song or a band because I like it. The fact that other people like it is irrelavent. They will more than likely like something about the song I've never even considered and if not surely that's a bonus!

 

[echoplex]

Yeah, I agree with Hawkeye, I really don't get why the popularity of any music should have any bearing on my perception of it.

It's purely illusory, in most cases at least, to think that you're the only one who likes something. Just because you haven't met other fans doesn't mean they're not out there. And what, if you meet them is your appreciation of the music suddenly diminished? If anything, knowing other people who like the same stuff just makes it more enjoyable, because you can share your appreciation, which I enjoy. That's just me though.

That said, I do kinda hate it when music I like is featured on a commercial. Not because it's a sign of popularity, but just because it takes the focus off the art of the music and cheapens it a bit. It doesn't make me hate the song though, I just prefer things not to be in the advertisement format. It seems like bastardization or something, I dunno.

Also, I know some people will hate this, but, you know, sometimes music is popular because it's... well... good. Let that sink in for a moment. (Not in any way implying all popular music is good btw)

 

[Daray]

I recognise alot of what i read in how i experience this. I dislike music that is praised by the masses so to say. I could have liked nirvana if the local rockbar wasnt crowded with youngsters with all the same nirvana t-shirt. Like i read earlier here, it seems as if the music gets this association with these kind of people, and i don't want to associate listening music to belonging to a certain group/mold (as i percieve nirvana shirt wearing youngsters).

I also feel that when i discover new music, that other people shouldnt be popular with the music that i found (and they know because they know me) as if they stole something "made" by my creativity, and takes the credits for them (and when they don't fit with how i percieve te music).

well, it happened once only, but that was how i felt.

 

[Auburn]

omg.. I hate this too.. >.>
It was getting rather ridiculous at one point, so I decided to try and mentally overcome it. (because well, y'know, my mind is all powerful and can fix any problem!)

I did find, however, that if I consciously disassociate the music/object from the person who recommended it to me, I am able to create my own personal connections to it and feel validated in that I created it all on my own. I mentally recite:

"Ok, you're about to start this new anime/song/etc. Clear your mind from associations. It's just you and the author/artist. Nobody else. It doesn't matter how you stumbled upon this work. Focus on the present. Try to understand what the author/artist is trying to say to you and decide how you feel about it."

 

[Chimera]

Heh, I'm pretty much the exact opposite (in most cases).
If a friend suggests music to me that I really like, then I feel like it's brought us closer for a short time. But then I go off on my own and discover more about the music and make it "mine", so much that I can forget who suggested it in the first place.

I'm the same as Adymus in that once an artist/song gets popular, I have to move on. I don't turn it into one of those "I LIKED THIS BAND BEFORE THEY WERE POPULAR, YA'LL ARE POSERS" things, I just lose all desire to listen to the song when I hear obnoxious people at school singing it. (With a few exceptions.)

Also, I have a terrible time recommending music to other people. It gets harder the closer I am to someone. I definitely think it's a privacy thing.
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[420MuNkEy]

I don't think I've ever liked music that was suggested to me by a human (as opposed to a computer algorithm). I don't tend to like popular music, but I think this has more to do with most of it devoid of anything even resembling art than with it's popularity. There are artists that are extremely popular that I enjoy (Gorillaz, Daft Punk, and many historical artists (ie, ones that no longer produce anything)).

I've recommended music to people in the past, but I felt weird about it and made sure not to over-hype anything (cause that might get them to expect too much and ruin their experience). A few of them really liked the music I suggested and kept coming back for more suggestions

It's funny to see commercials mentioned, as I found a couple great (albeit a little obscure) artists through the use of their music in commercials (Röyksopp - Geico commercial, Citizen Cope - Acura commercial, and a few others). I've also heard rather obscure music (that I was already aware of and listened to) on TV in various places, which takes me by surprise every time (Ulrich Schnauss - Used in 5 or 6 BBC Horizon episodes and RJD2 - Used in the intro to the show Madmen).

What I have a problem with is when people ask me what kind of music I listen too. There is no way to answer this question in any useful way that, so I usually just answer "The audible kind". I would explain this further, but I think it's fairly obvious to those capable of thought. If it's not, let me know and I'll try to elaborate


Edit: I also forgot to add, I completely stopped listening to the radio a long time ago. All the music I listen to is from my own musical exploration.

 

[LAM]

??? Good music is good music. WTF is the point of "staying ahead" of everyone else by leaving good music? Although I do listen to metal, so perhaps the approach and experience of being a metal head is different than an electronic music fan. Still it seems so illogical and a complete waste of time.