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Moved: life challenges

RunForWord

Developing INTP
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Today 5:15 AM
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May 12, 2014
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my biggest concern is getting my license. I finished my drivers ed about a year ago and i hated it. After i finished i had my mom cancel the drivers test because i hated it that much. since then I've only driven a couple times and havnt in months. Now after all this time i set up the test to be in a month because i know im not going to want to do it any more until i force myself. The reason i hate it is because i was terrible in drivers ed and had anxiety that seemed to make me not be able to think clearly. He always told me to trust what he says because i would need to figure it out myself too and there wasnt enough time for me to process it in some situations which i think is the reason why i hate it. I also have a pretty bad sense of direction which i fear will make me a terrible driver. Any advice?
 

Vrecknidj

Prolific Member
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Location
Michigan/Indiana, USA
Re: life challenges

I don't know where you live, who you are, what your circumstances are, etc. But, I can say that, as a rule, the more you do something, the better you get at it. If you have access to a car (that is, a friend's car, for instance), and a safe place (like an empty parking lot), you can practice driving again and again and again until you have some confidence.

In general, quite a few people "hate" some of the things that they lack confidence in doing well. Practice may not make perfect, but, enough practice will build both confidence and skill, and, as those increase, both the hatred of the activity and the fear of doing it poorly will diminish.

Also, if you hate and/or fear some aspect of driving, it'll probably get exacerbated on the driving test, which could make things worse.
 

RunForWord

Developing INTP
Local time
Today 5:15 AM
Joined
May 12, 2014
Messages
261
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Re: life challenges

I don't know where you live, who you are, what your circumstances are, etc. But, I can say that, as a rule, the more you do something, the better you get at it. If you have access to a car (that is, a friend's car, for instance), and a safe place (like an empty parking lot), you can practice driving again and again and again until you have some confidence.

In general, quite a few people "hate" some of the things that they lack confidence in doing well. Practice may not make perfect, but, enough practice will build both confidence and skill, and, as those increase, both the hatred of the activity and the fear of doing it poorly will diminish.

Also, if you hate and/or fear some aspect of driving, it'll probably get exacerbated on the driving test, which could make things worse.

Thanks for the info. It seems like my lack of confidence is making it seem way worse than it really is. I'm just going to have to practice
 

Affinity

Active Member
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Apr 17, 2011
Messages
319
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Location
SLC
Re: life challenges

Practice, even if it means spending hours in a parking lot before you are comfortable to move to the road. You need to be comfortable with operating a vehicle first off, understand how much input you need to give to manipulate the vehicle the way you want it to. That will provide you a lot of confidence just from understanding how the vehicle is going to react, than slowly integrate and practice those skills on the open road.
 
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He always told me to trust what he says because i would need to figure it out myself too and there wasnt enough time for me to process it in some situations which i think is the reason why i hate it.
I think I know what you're going through here. When I was learning to drive, nothing bothered me more than having a passenger in the vehicle who wouldn't keep quiet (it still bothers/distracts me). I needed to explore on my own and define the car for myself. Lots of trial and error, but after so many repetitions I knew how the car was going to behave. Then I started driving too fast. :D

Maybe start off with a pre-emptive statement something to the effect of "If it's okay with you, I want to experiment on my own a little bit and I'll ask you if need any help, alright?"

Also, just budget extra travel time and you won't have to worry as much about your sense of direction. No big deal if you get lost. That's something that develops over time as you become familiar with the surrounding area.

Oh, and practice parallel parking. I failed that part twice.
 

DonaldERay

Redshirt
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May 13, 2015
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At first we all had this problem because of the lack of patience and all the bad things we see happening in traffic. But overall it is great to adapt to driving because it will give you a feeling of independence like nothing else.
 
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