Meh...

[Thoughtful]

My life feels like it's at a standstill. I have no reason to live, but no desire to die.

I go to work every day and shelve shoes for 8 hours (lord knows why I even bother), come home and play some video game, go to bed, rinse and repeat. I've thought about trying my hand at the dating scene, but at the moment it sounds like it'd be more trouble than it's worth.

Recently a bunch of my extroverted friends have been inviting me to things. An ESXJ girl at work who just went through a breakup has invited me to a Halloween party (which sounds rather boring, though I'll probably go), an ESFJ guy has been pestering me to go and play tennis or come and cook with him, and a ISTJ girl invited me to get Sushi tomorrow (as a friend, not a date, or so I hope). Part of me wants to try filling the void with these activities, But the other part of me wants to quit work and social activities and be left alone.

I miss my NT family, My dad and younger brother are ENTJ, my mother INTJ. I've been away for awhile, but visiting them is not an option at this time. I can't seem to find anyone out here I relate to.

I'm starting college in the spring, I hope it will help things to improve, but that's still a few months away.

Anyone else go through anything similar? Any suggestions on improving my lot in life?

 

[Jesse]

Firstly quit your darn job. I know you need money and all that but it's dragging you down. I say do as much of these social activities as you can. Even though you probably won't enjoy them they will get you out of your head for a bit. About the video games, play a different one if your stuck playing the same one. When something you find enjoyable stops becoming enjoyable do something else or stop for a bit. Whenever I play games I find the most enjoyment when I haven't played something for a bit. College will help quite a bit so try to focus on that. Also try calling your parents and family. They won't think your stupid or anything for wanting to talk to them for a bit.

 

[ApostateAbe]

Yes. When you start building yourself up to someone who is more proud and more of a contributing member of society, that is when it will change. College may be the start of that, or it may not be. Some people live entirely monotonous lives without ever building themselves up.

When I felt like this, working a lame job and spending too much time arguing against religion on the Internet, I decided to take more risks and make myself into somebody significant. Every Sunday morning, I would go to the entrance of a random megachurch (or a mosque, or downtown) with a large sign that says, "GOD IS FAKE," then I would go home, write about it, put it online, and build fans. It was loads of fun, I was taking plenty of risks both socially and physically, I learned a lot about what typically goes on in the Christian mind from talking to those people, and I ultimately benefited from it. During that period that lasted over a year, I almost never felt depressed. Shortly after that wore off its fun, I went back to school.

I say pick something that really interests you, and then do something drastic with it. Go on an adventure with it. Start a large long-term project with it. Do something with it that you can show off to your friends or complete strangers. That is how you make your life worth living.

 

[s0nystyle]

existential crisis? unlike jesse i think you should keep your job (the last thing you'd want is to build debt) and try hanging out with the groups of people you've mentioned. Sure they might be boring and the halloween party might suck horribly, but it's still an experience that you wouldn't have felt if you were working. Life is just an accumulation of experiences right? so why not take a chance see if the experiences turn out good? Imo you should take some chances lest your life be an accumulation of nothingness.

"Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing." - Helen Keller

 

[Jesse]

I say change the job. Worse thing you can do is be unemployed. More time by yourself is probably not a good thing.

 

[cheese]

Shelving shoes actually sounds really fun. Anything that's repetitive, procedural, somewhat monotonous and easy to master sounds like a fun job. I suppose the pay's not fun though.

ApostateAbe: Gutsy. I want to do something like that, break out of the routine of being a part of humdrum humanity.

 

[The Gopher]

NO don't be alone that is the worst thing. If your going though an existential crisis meet people change the world I dunno.

 

[Latte]

You want change. You crave something to adapt to again. You have nothing to adapt to that you are wholly willing to try.

You are skeptical regarding whether you will manage to adapt in a way that is pleasant for you, and if what you have available for yourself to adapt to (these activities, for example) will be worthy things to experience, to try. They may just be more boring dead end roads, or worse: something that will hurt you or make you depressed.

As mentioned above, something you are passionate about will be very good for you. If you do not know what you are passionate about, getting new experiences will help you have something from which to derive ideas of what you could want, what could be good for you, bringing colour back in your life.

I would recommend watching good movies regularly as well (and possibly non-epicly-long "closed story" series (naruto and one-piece are examples of open ended stories)). They provide concrete things to view, metaphors, analogies and inspiration that may help you find out what could vivify your existence.


Bon voyage from your relatively-not-uncomfortable-zone.

 

[EditorOne]

Don't quit the job. By all means look for something better, but don't quit. Love of money may be the root of all evil, but lack of money is the root of all misery.
By all means accept all social invitations, and if you feel the need to be more comfortable by telling whoever takes you that you are usually uncomfortable in social situations and may need to be bailed out from time to time, guess what? It will be OK with that person. I can almost guarantee this. Get out there, do the best you can, and don't spin in on yourself like a sink emptying of water.

I've been out of work for almost a year. Fortunately I have resources, so financially it just doesn't matter as much as I thought it might. It has certainly been a real dose of adrenaline to realize I'm now free to do whatever I WANT to do, rather than having to do one thing or another to bring in money to support a family. I'm just sharing that with you to point out that you are in the same position: You can do whatever you want to do. If you need to try out things to see which of them appeals, you can do that, and probably should do that. Just take the "stare into the uncaring eye of eternity until one of us blinks" option off the table.

 

[EyeSeeCold]

The only option is a change of lifestyle, but the question is-do you really want to live an extreme life?

This has been brought up already and the answer is the same, doing something different for a day or even some weeks will just bring your high back down even more. You need to stick to it and change it up. It's all about inertia.

 

[Thoughtful]

Well, thank you for the Ideas. I'm not planning on going anywhere, as I want to keep my job for now (Want a new laptop, as this beast is 4 years old and for all intents Immobile. Plus Landscape Architecture will require CAD), and I'm not moving far for college this spring.

I did find a new game however, and I think it's been very helpful. I'm playing poker on Facebook (no real money), and I find it amusing how much a logic biased mind gives me an advantage over other players. It also brings more of a thrill than minecraft (interesting though it may be). It's kind of ironic when you think of "gambling" as one of the "vices" that people traditionally turn to when going through mental crisis

The advice to stick with the activities was also great, I'm getting a little excited about the Halloween party, and the costume gives me an excuse to watch Doctor Who (I'm going as the tenth doctor), and I'm realizing my resemblances to Tennant (always nice to think one looks good).

Oh yeah, and my lead at work is joining the marines, tomorrow is his last day.

So yeah, renewed confidence in myself, added thrill in life, plus I get to see my boss leave and get replaced with an overwhelmed newbie. crisis over, for now at least.

*prepares to eat his own words*