My INTJ and I will go through phases where we go round after round. Personally, I don't see why we need to discuss a topic twice. He, on the other hand, will double back frequently. I suspect it's because he felt a "power deficit" at the end of the previous round, and is trying to avenge himself. At least that's what a couple's therapist would say. I don't know what he hopes to accomplish, if he didn't feel good about his position at the previous attempt, but oh well.
If I argue a point, he gets cranky. He denies my data and refuses to give any of his own. Then, he becomes the fallacy king spouting out garbage and insults faster than I can bag it up. If I get sarcastic back, he interprets it (correctly) as me shutting down, and he gets even crankier. If I agree, then I'm patronizing him. If I say "I don't want to talk about it", then I'm hindering communication.
Sounds impossible, right? Here's the strategy: Let him babble, but don't volunteer any ideas or arguments of your own. Don't converse. Just let him have his grandiose moment (which I fondly think of as an installment of "the ignorance lecture series") and then let it fizzle naturally. The whole thing is wrapped up in about 20 minutes, he feels special, and you can get back to fucking or playing video games or whatever.
