Burdens of Si- regrets, caged nostalgia,

[GYX_Kid]

Having "internalizing" sensing, I suppose that we only "know" what has been stored in our internal personal databases.

In a sense, the only reality an Si can sense is their own personal past. They are trapped in compartmentalized memories, and symbolized concepts they've built. Regarding the "present time", there are also activities which utilize these stored concepts to create fun and/or meaning.

It seems of utmost importance to branch out into the world as much as possible, to dilute the perceived importance of Si-objects which may become obsessed over without fresh new memories to experience and create. The longer spent dwelling in a limited internal library, the more time spent building up the actual meaning in sensed reality of something which can never have closure brought to it (if one of these objects is at the center of a Ti/Si loop).

To put it in English, I've spent most of my life so far dwelling on mistakes, which became mistakes, etc. It's easy said in simple terms like that, but this thread is about the more detailed science of the phenomenon and how to understand and take it apart from its roots.

 

[Meer]

Mindfulness and awareness can free you somewhat from only considering your life in terms of little boxes that are connected together. The patterns, symbolized concepts, you see in the universe are not the actual universe itself.

 

[intpz]

I'm dwelling on mistakes very often too. Sometimes even just after the act I think "shit, why didn't I do that?" or "why didn't I say that?" or "why did I do that?"

That is really annoying and unhealthy. I'd like that to be gone. It's pointless to do that.

 

[nedenom]

Same here. I like to punish myself thoroughly for my mistakes, thinking I will learn from it, but I never do.

This is what I call negative Si. It is a product of an immature and underdeveloped Si function. Our logic is often flawed when it comes to this, as we usually have gained new information afterwards that we didn't have at the time we made that mistake, thus we are unfair in our judgement of ourselves. There is a saying that "hindsight is always 20/20".

 

[intpz]

Actually I never punish myself for what I do wrong. I just think about it and feel something like this: "fuck, that was bad," well you probably know the feeling, and that it's hard to describe feelings for INTPs... Kinda sad and painful feeling. I hate it. I wish I could do something about losing it.

 

[briangriffin32]

I was flipping channels once, and caught the video for Smashing Pumpkins "1979". It reminded me of my senior year in high school, when that song was all the rage. It was depressing nostalgia because I thought, "If only I knew then what I know now".

Strangely enough, that song was about nostalgia in and of itself.

 

[pjoa09]

I'd like to think I would've dealt with the past differently if I knew better.

But as I think about it I realize that I wouldn't have.

I am a slave to my urges and despite any warnings I would've done what I have done in the past.

Nicely put, I am bad at taking advice.

But mistakes make you, you.

Otherwise you would've been like every other fool who let other fools decide for their lives.

 

[xeno_girl]

It seems of utmost importance to branch out into the world as much as possible, to dilute the perceived importance of Si-objects which may become obsessed over without fresh new memories to experience and create.

I think engaging with the world is also a fulfilling way to feed your Ne. Take a look at this description (PS this site has many insightful articles for INTPs):

http://personalityjunkie.com/the-intp/2/ (specifically read "INTPs’ Auxiliary Function: Extraverted Intuition (Ne)"... although the entire INTP profile is very good)

and here:

http://personalityjunkie.com/09/how...uition-ne-to-cultivate-more-meaningful-lives/

 

[MichiganJFrog]

I find that, as agonizing as they can be, Si nostalgia and TiSi loops occasionally generate some useful insights, or at least Ne-informed suppositions on why things went the way that they did (Ti and Fe probably also play a role in the formation of these insights). I also find that it helps to be as mindful of the process as I'm going through it -- metacognitive thinking, as it were. Other times, it just plain stinks. Given the way we're wired, I don't think we have much choice in the matter, so we may as well make the best of it.

I also agree with the posters who say it's important to get out of the house once in a while, even if the outside world makes no apparent sense at first blush. That and something along the lines of tai-chi help me get rid of that bad energy when it gets to be more than I can take.

 

[redbaron]

Everything you did or decided on at a point in time was the thing that you either wanted to do the most, or the thing you thought was best to do.

For this reason, I feel no shame or regret even when thinking of my most cringe-worthy moments in my past. I was who I was then, and I am who I am now. 5 years ago I was a different person, but I don't regret the things I said or did then.

 

[intpz]

Everything you did or decided on at a point in time was the thing that you either wanted to do the most, or the thing you thought was best to do.

For this reason, I feel no shame or regret even when thinking of my most cringe-worthy moments in my past. I was who I was then, and I am who I am now. 5 years ago I was a different person, but I don't regret the things I said or did then.

What if you were doing something, or was about to do something and had no way of not doing it and realized that there was 3 much better ways to do it?

 

[EyeSeeCold]

I think if Si is going to be related to nostalgia then so is Ni, both of them as Pi or introverted perception. Si probably has tendencies of actually living in the past, not giving up old habits and attachments, Ni on the other hand habitually reminiscing events in thought..

 

[intpz]

I think if Si is going to be related to nostalgia then so is Ni, both of them as Pi or introverted perception. Si probably has tendencies of actually living in the past, not giving up old habits and attachments, Ni on the other hand habitually reminiscing events in thought..

Well I don't mind changing habits. I even want to do it, as currently there's nothing good in my situation. I think Si wouldn't let for the changes to take place even if your situation would suck greatly.

 

[EyeSeeCold]

Well I don't mind changing habits. I even want to do it, as currently there's nothing good in my situation. I think Si wouldn't let for the changes to take place even if your situation would suck greatly.

Well by habits I mean for example wearing your college / highschool varsity jacket even though you are several years out of school, that kind of living in the past.

 

[intpz]

Well by habits I mean for example wearing your college / highschool varsity jacket even though you are several years out of school, that kind of living in the past.

Well that would be closer to the vicinity of mental illness, not to a personality trait.

 

[EyeSeeCold]

Well that would be closer to the vicinity of mental illness, not to a personality trait.

Nevermind, I'm pretty sure what I said was misinterpreted.

 

[redbaron]

What if you were doing something, or was about to do something and had no way of not doing it and realized that there was 3 much better ways to do it?

Please define, 'no way of not doing it' and give an example, or I can't really answer that question. I can't really see any situation in which I literally had no way of avoiding something. There would be consequences that I might face, but I still could have avoided doing it.

But if there was somehow absolutely no way of avoiding something, I logically don't see the point of being a sour puss about it. Accept your situation and move your intelligence onto something worthwhile.