Are INTPs Stubborn?

[trevo4311]

Sometimes people call me stubborn and It always kind of blindsides me because I dont consider myself to be a stubborn person. I mean there are some things I wont budge on but thats only because they are very important to me. For most other things I am willing to compromise, but I will not just give up something that is important to me in hopes that someone will give me something in return, without ever reaching an agreement. Things that are unimportant, or not permanent I will almost always be willing to just go with whatever the other person wants. Especially if someone asks me something like what do you want to do? My usual response is "I don't care, what do you want to do?" But that might be because I never know anything fun to do.

I should also add that I will usually not just go with what someone else says, just because they said it. If they don't back up what they're requesting/demanding with a GOOD reason as to why it is better than what I have already established then I will always go with what I established until I receive a good reason as to why I should do it differently.

Have you ever been called stubborn? Are you stubborn?

 

[ummidk]

I don't think I'm very stubborn at all as far as willing to compromise, but on certain topics I can be stubborn that's only because I've thought enough to be pretty convinced on some things.

 

[Kurious Kat]

Stubborn is my mother's favorite adjective to describe me. But, like you, I don't think I am stubborn. I am described by others as easy-going, laid back, etc. Funny thing is, I know I'm not either one of those. Come to think of it...I have no idea what I am. I'm still trying to figure that out. That's a big part of the reason I am here.

 

[Minamimoto]

Sometimes people call me stubborn and It always kind of blindsides me because I dont consider myself to be a stubborn person. I mean there are some things I wont budge on but thats only because they are very important to me. For most other things I am willing to compromise, but I will not just give up something that is important to me in hopes that someone will give me something in return, without ever reaching an agreement. Things that are unimportant, or not permanent I will almost always be willing to just go with whatever the other person wants. Especially if someone asks me something like what do you want to do? My usual response is "I don't care, what do you want to do?" But that might be because I never know anything fun to do.

I should also add that I will usually not just go with what someone else says, just because they said it. If they don't back up what they're requesting/demanding with a GOOD reason as to why it is better than what I have already established then I will always go with what I established until I receive a good reason as to why I should do it differently.

Have you ever been called stubborn? Are you stubborn?

Ahh, this sounds very much like myself. I'd not consider that stubbornness. C: One must stay true to their morals. I suppose the people who don't ponder morality as much find this quite irking, and label it as stubbornness, but I disagree.

Stubborn? Feh. My mom perceives me as stubborn, but that's because she gets the 'shut up, go away' end of my personality after I've spent all my tolerance at school, and is always breaking my focus. >.< Of course, I'm almost always focused on something at home, so...I must admit, my problems in getting along with her are mostly my own fault. Among people I care for, I try my best to deal with them in a manner appropriate to their own perception, so long as it doesn't violate my base morals.

I jokingly refer to myself as the third most stubborn person on Earth, one of the top two being my mother, but I do not honestly consider myself stubborn as a whole. There are two cases where I'm adamant; I don't give up on people until they've given up on me, and I don't compromise my morals to conform or appease. My morals are in constant development, but if I'm being told to do something without a sufficient argument to change the way I look at the morality of the situation, I immediately withdraw.

Though, again, in dealing with the people I live with, I'm quite different. Explosive reactions are easily provoked with the smallest of situations, which explains why my mom would call me stubborn.

 

[Minamimoto]

Stubborn is my mother's favorite adjective to describe me. But, like you, I don't think I am stubborn. I am described by others as easy-going, laid back, etc. Funny thing is, I know I'm not either one of those. Come to think of it...I have no idea what I am. I'm still trying to figure that out. That's a big part of the reason I am here.

The difference between the way you behave and the way you're seen by others is, of course, the difference between how you behave and think, no? Perhaps you're both; it just depends on whether you choose to define yourself by your thoughts, your actions, or a combination. C: I'm here for a similar purpose. There's much to be learned about yourself from anybody who cares to speak.

 

[A22]

People say I'm stubborn. I keep telling them I'm not but they don't get it.

 

[a detached retina]

I'm stubborn if somebody asks me to do something that is stupid, I don't want to put the effort into, and they don't have a good sound reasoning as to why I should do it.

You have to remember that INTPs are used to questioning the reasoning behind something. Therefore we usually have a pretty good idea of what makes sense and what doesn't. Other types put less emphasis on reasoning and are more used to accepting things that don't make sense to them. They simply care less. When something logically insufficient is proposed that contradiction is quite clear to us because our pattern of thinking leads us to always be almost unconsciously aware of the logic of things.

For a simplified example if you ask me to take out the trash on tuesday I will do it happily but on thursday I will "stubbornly" refuse. This is because trash collection comes on Wednesday and I don't see the point in taking it all the way out to the curb almost a week early, I'd rather take it all out at once on tuesday and save myself some time. To a type that is not used to thinking about why we do things this seems stubborn and almost random. "Why did you take out the trash tuesday and now you're giving me hell about it."

For me at least, logic is almost like a sacred religion to me and people don't understand why it upsets me if something doesn't make sense. This can seem like erratic or stubborn behavior to others. Of course I realize this is ridiculous but I can't just change that aspect of me at will. I don't understand why people get offended if their religions are challenged but I guess that's just my stubborn selfish worldview that logic is a superior religion to whatever religion they're following.

 

[Zionoxis]

I too, do not believe myself to be stubborn. I somehow have earned that label. Could it possibly a mislabeling or misunderstanding of the meaning of the word? Some people just enjoy throwing words around though the meaning has little to nothing in common with the trait.

 

[zycia]

I have been declared stubborn by people around me many a time. Mostly after their commands being refused by me..

If I don't necessarily comply to people's whims and wishes in general (especially when i don't find them reasonable or just!!!) I don't think it defines me as a stubborn person.

 

[EditorOne]

OK, but you all consider yourselves principled, right? Our "principled" is other people's "stubborn." Next time you're in one of these situations, look for the principle your intuition is telling you is being violated, threatened or bypassed, and articulate that. It might make things easier all around, the other folks might understand what you're doing, or you might realize the principle thought out and then articulated is not as important as the principle in the background seemed to be.