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Old 30th-November-2016, 09:10 PM   #1
Creeping Death
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Default When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

Throughout high school and several years after, I noticed I was overly aware of myself, or maybe I just thought that. I would avoid certain social situations simply because the clothes I thought I looked good in weren't washed yet, or my hair wasn't perfect or maybe I forgot to brush. And a whole list of other things.
I would even refrain from certain actions in public if it meant being on the spot for a split second, and if a car was approaching an intersection at the same time I was coming to the crosswalk, I'd stop before the crosswalk and casually pretend I was busy on my phone so the car would go and I wouldn't have to walk in front of them. I still do this sometimes at night though.

Over the last year and a half or so, I realized how little most people actually matter. Even though I still loath the same encounters, I've slowly taken steps from freaking out, to being disgruntled, to not giving two fucks, to no fucks given. Not to say I don't care about how I look or dress anymore, just that I deal with current situations a little better even though I'm not the best me all the time. Just under 24 years to actually run out of every last fuck to give.

Do you still have a pile of fucks hidden somewhere that you are gladly ready and willing to hand out? Have you run out completely? How was your journey like?
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Old 30th-November-2016, 09:21 PM   #2
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

I still give some fucks, but I think my not giving a fuck self is too prejudice and simplistic. I've been experiment-posting on different types of forums and realize there are sometimes small nuances that determines a perspective. Small, insignificant nuances that play a huge role in how you perceive reality. It so very easily sways. I think in my case, I have to give some fucks to have a better understanding of things.

I don't tend to care about too trivial things, however. It depends
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Old 1st-December-2016, 12:48 AM   #3
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

I don't have many fucks left to give.
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Old 1st-December-2016, 02:24 AM   #4
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

I stopped giving fucks about that kind of stuff after repeatedly seeing evidence that people simply don't care about how you look. Rather, they only care about your personality.

But that is different from your view, OP. I haven't stopped giving fucks because people "don't matter" – my view has grown to be the opposite – but it's just that I realized that things that matter to people are not what I previously thought mattered to people.
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Old 1st-December-2016, 04:06 AM   #5
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

The 20s where I was getting whatever I wanted dating wealthy cougars. Goodies, vacations, beautiful women, etc.

I do believe there is such a thing as a watermark that can't be retrieved and nothing again matches it. It's hard to get up for wanting things when you've had all you ever wanted.

What keeps depression at bay are goals. That's really the key.
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Old 1st-December-2016, 09:50 AM   #6
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

Upon having children.

Fuck this; fuck that.

;_;
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Old 1st-December-2016, 02:36 PM   #7
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

I have a limited amount of fucks to give. So I only give a fuck about a few things. Or about a few people. Very few people. The list is very short - if you make the list you're incredibly special. Currently has only my kids on it.

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Old 1st-December-2016, 07:27 PM   #8
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

I do give a fuck on the future of mankind.
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Old 1st-December-2016, 10:42 PM   #9
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

1997.
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Old 3rd-December-2016, 12:28 AM   #10
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

When I noticed giving fucks resulted in the same or worse result than not giving fucks. So I said fuck this.
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Old 3rd-December-2016, 01:07 AM   #11
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

There was a moment. In my late teens, I made an effort to try to fit in. I was 20, working in a bar at the time, and trying (not very well) to blend with the humans. We worked weekends, so we'd go out on a Wednesday night. And at the start, we'd sit in this bar where the music was too loud for such a small place, so no one could hear each other. And this girl started with us at the bar. We'd been mates for a while as neither fitted in very well. One night, during this ritual of sitting there drinking whilst hardly able to hear anything, she just said to me, "this is some boring shit. Let's go have some fun." And so we left. And had a crazy night where we ended up sleeping in some random house party on a council estate no one dares enter. I learnt the freedom of not conforming that day. And I stopped giving a fuck. And thus is how I met my best mate. And stopped giving a huge amount of fucks. I now reserve such energy to things deserve giving a fuck about - social conformity not being one of them.

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Old 3rd-December-2016, 03:04 AM   #12
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

I have very few fucks left to give. They're mostly vestigial fucks, leftover from years of caring about things I now logically know aren't worth it, but still hold onto a little anyway.
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Old 3rd-December-2016, 03:29 AM   #13
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

ITT everyone gives a lot of fucks about how few fucks they give
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Old 3rd-December-2016, 06:37 PM   #14
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

how you look matters a lot to people, because it reveals your personality and more, but what matters to people only matters to you depending on whether your goals involve those people and most of my goals don't involve anyone anymore, except that my goals involve keeping them from bothering me, so i can't be too provocative.

if anything i do involves concrete interaction with people i will deliberately avoid any expectations about the outcome of this thing, so while i am neurologically conditioned to be hyper aware of how other people perceive and judge, i can still express myself more openly and thus also know myself more than most, than more ambitious people, who may have less awareness of how other people think but depend on it so much more, they disappear behind their show.

but i also have much less social freedom, meaning getting involved and becoming dependent seems unacceptable to me, feeling wise, while my mind craves freedom to play without dependency to outcome ... impossible. you have to choose.

either you respect how the world operates, or you stay out of it, or you get malmed by the consequences. only exception is the one who can malm everyone else.

how can we be so neurotic about it and hope that therapy can make a difference? the only psychological variable is whether you crave the impossible to the point of wishful thinking (constant state of freedom and hope) and fear and try to deny the reality (constant dependency and frequent disappointment) or whether you accept what is, including your desire to avoid bad consequences.
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Old 31st-December-2016, 08:28 AM   #15
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

I gave fucks up until about fifth grade. I'm glad to be rid of them.
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Old 31st-December-2016, 02:15 PM   #16
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

2016. when everyone startet hating me for representing an easy, affordable and delicious fix for all diseases of civilisation. humanity can go dive in a tidal wave.
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Old 31st-December-2016, 04:36 PM   #17
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

"Not giving a fuck" is not a virtue. It's more a question of, what is good and what is bad to care about relative to one's being.

Once one's energies are exhausted in dealing with a certain aspect of reality, then, one becomes cynical, thus, apathy, is a sign of chaos (i.e. a lack of inner control, harmony), over-stimulation, and fatigue. This is one way a cynical attitude develops: from inefficiency or exhaustion. Here, one's needs are not dealt with adequately. Keep in mind, those who, due to circumstance, "don't give a fuck" about whatever, did care - they were indeed effected by a specific stimuli . . . repression and denial is at play.

Rather than dealing with the effect appropriately, resulting in a different, more natural, honest inter-action, through a form of re-conciliation, it is minimized, blocked, and shut down via abstraction, that is an inherent falsity, leading to discordant and rigid behavior or cerebral dominance and bodily repression.

What is good and bad relative to one's self is never accounted for, leading to a (moral) regression and being self-centered. Further, "not giving a fuck", in reality, is not an overcoming of the other, as one would like to believe, but being overcome by the other, and diminished in spirit.

Tis' a false sense of power: look at all the modern rappers and their pretense of possessing power (where in reality, they've been thoroughly degraded in mindless lifestyles) - all their work exude a "don't give a fuck" and narcissistic attitude.
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Old 1st-January-2017, 04:09 AM   #18
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

I started off thinking I gave no fucks, when in reality I gave a few.

I've spent my time since then trying to find ways to increase the number of fucks I have on retainer for when I (or others) need them. My fuck-giving logistical skill has increased enormously, to the point where I sometimes exceed expectation in the fuck-giving department.

I don't think being Freddy Few-Fucks is in any way something to be admired. We're born into this world scrambling for meaning and I consider it childish to take solace in how little you've found. If someone is truly omega I would predict them spending precisely zero effort telling the world about it.
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Old 3rd-January-2017, 06:00 PM   #19
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

IRL I'm not a known giver of fucks, but little do people know, I give more fucks than I let on.

Their value should not be underestimated.
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Old 18th-February-2017, 07:28 PM   #20
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

To find out what matters and what doesn't seems like a beautiful thing to me. Narrowing our focus down to the few things that should be celebrated is a good goal in life. To give absolutely no fucks seems to be a way of starting over from scratch. Burning the forest for the new growth.
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Old 19th-February-2017, 10:08 PM   #21
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

That's a neat concept, maybe I should start to try growing a forest; it may help make getting things done easier for me.
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Old 20th-October-2017, 11:09 PM   #22
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

I think I ran out of fucks once the hormonal changes of adolescence subsided. The opinions or perceptions of strangers matter very little to me, unless it's something I judge in myself (like accidentally not realizing a queue has formed, or daydreaming at a red light and not realizing it's turned green).
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Old 20th-October-2017, 11:21 PM   #23
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Default Re: When did you actually run out of fucks to give?

I Fuck You
No
You Fuck Me
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