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  • It is either just me, or again, whatever negative gossip there is, is about me.

    I wish I could either say fuck it I don't give a shit, or just raise hell with everybody else. Of course, it may be the case that I'm simply paranoid.

    Somehow, all this makes me wanna just get out of this supposedly nice place.
    I think this is the forceful exclusion by the third of the fourth born as mentioned in birth order articles.

    In any case, I have transferred the funds and that is that.

    Sometimes I feel like I am Cain in the Bible.
    I have had a long debate with the significant other about why we should not be precluded from praying that God find a way to convince Satan to cease and desist from what he is doing, and thereafter forgive him.

    Oftentimes I am not very sure what I am advocating for, nor why I am doing so.

    But an unwillingness to consider possibilities is something that I do not wish to accept.
    Well following my SO's advice I decided to write some of the things I am grateful for:

    1. I have a nicer place! Close to my workplace too.
    2. I have a reasonable salary.
    3. People are nicer at work.
    4. I do have some friends.
    5. I haven't forgotten how to code in JavaScript.
    Actually, I don't think I will meet them for lunch again. At most, 1 or 2 of them, alone.
    It's also very ironic that Scotland and Norway were historical enemies in the time of MacBeth, given how enamoured the SNP is with Norway's oil fund.
    I am reading stuff about Scottish independence, and as usual, I agree most of all with the Lib Dems. It's hard to imagine a Scotland apart from Britain - even bagpipes and kilts had spread to the rest of the UK. But Scotland and England have always been somewhat distinct, and federalism would also pave the way for a proper written constitution of the UK.

    As usual, however, sensible liberal proposals are always laughed off the table.

    MC again.

    The political party demoralises me, even when I'm going for a non-political event.

    But well. On the bright side I learnt something today. Supposedly durian is good for cough (gasp!)
    All I know perhaps is that I do not know anything at all, especially what I am doing and what is to be done next.

    I lack planning so much that I am doing things before I am aware of the next step or even aware of what I am actually doing at the moment.

    Every concern is simply swept under a carpet in the heady dizziness of a spur of the moment act. The next thing that happens is that I suddenly panic and realise what a predicament I am in - that I have to pretend to be confident and pretend that I have an idea of what I should do next, even when I don't.

    Most of the time I am quite happy with my randomness. I call it spontaneity. But perhaps it is rashness, recklessness and stupidity. Undertaking to do something when I have no idea what it entails.
    Patro en cxielo bonvolu helpi min forgesi cxio kio dolorigas mian menson.

    Kaj ankaux mi nur volas havi paca vivo.
    A most familiar scene in my blessed country.

    Passenger: "请问这里是不是......?"
    Bus driver: "我也不太清楚......"

    I mean, seriously, even if one has absolutely nothing against immigrants from China, one wonders why the bus companies can't at least ensure that the bus drivers are well trained and know their bus routes well. And that's to say nothing of the many occasions when Singaporeans have to act as ad-hoc translators when there are non-Chinese speaking passengers on a bus.

    Ah well. It's bad enough that he has to spend the new year away from his family, in a foreign country, anyway.
    好喜歡看你坦白的眼眸 一片蔚藍晴空
    四季還有夏和冬 誰說只能做朋友

    多希望和你同一個星座 唱著同樣的歌
    當我真心愛上你 天地也會變溫柔

    讓我鼓起所有的勇氣 向你說聲新年快樂(我也好想聽你訴說)
    不管天上的雲怎麼笑 路上行人怎麼看我 (讓我牽著你的手)

    愛情總會有點緊張 都會有點徬徨(不要緊張不必徬徨)
    許多害羞的話 還有一年慢慢的講

    讓我鼓起所有的勇氣 向你說聲新年快樂(向你說聲新年快樂)
    不管天上的雲怎麼笑 路上行人怎麼看我

    祝我們快樂 祝你們快樂 祝大家快樂

    Kio estas tio?

    Cxu estas bona esti felicxa cxiukaze?

    Kio igas homojn esti felicxa?
    Estos la novjaro baldaux.

    Sxajnas ke estas pli fortuna jaro por mi.

    Sed cxiukaze, mi ne tre felicxe atendas. Unu pli jaro, pasinta.

    Ah tempo, kien vi iris?
    Unlike Taiwan, Korea was a slight disappointment.

    Don't get me wrong. It was a great holiday, nice country, and the esperantists were fabulous people as usual. Of course, I loved the snow and the skiing.

    What bugged me was that there seemed to be some uncivilised and unsanitary behaviour on the streets. It wasn't quite as bad as mainland China, but the impression I had of Koreans as a very polite and cultured people was somewhat marred as a result.
    Taiwan makes me feel proud to be Chinese.

    I know all of that inscription on Chiang Kai Shek's statue is bullshit, but I mean, I think it isn't bad to remembered as a faithful believer in Jesus Christ and a warrior for democracy battling the evil forces of communism. Chiang didn't exactly live up to those ideals, but I can't help but agree with the ideals he was supposed to have stood for.

    The quote, "the meaning of life is to better the lives of all humanity", especially resonated with me.

    We humans are really not against propaganda, only propaganda with disagree with :p.
    So. The neighbour kept my kettle in their room, forcing me to buy a ticker tape contraption for $20 to label it.

    Bleah. Mere small annoyance, God help me forgive and forget little trespasses. Grit teeth, reach out with love -_-.
    I wanted to write about this but forgot.

    Yesterday I bumped into Kido. It was nice to have a conversation in Cantonese with someone other than my mum!

    Yet I feel our paths have diverged, and will continue to do so. But perhaps our paths will converge again. Who knows?
    I have a major fear that I'm suffering from fatal insomnia.

    Dear Lord Jesus. Please help me to sleep tonight.
    Unable to sleep again. OMG.

    I've read of people dying from inability to sleep.
    It is but a few days more to the commencement of the bar exams.

    I am as unmotivated as ever.
    So. Eventually, I found my answer. Although it was an undesirable one, and I cussed myself for having taken so long to find something which should have been right under my nose, I have nevertheless derived some satisfaction at learning something new.

    Still regret choosing the law though; it was for such a flippant reason, too, one that holds little emotional weight now.
    Sometimes I wish I had never gone to law school.

    In fact, I sometimes wish I had never even gotten a single degree.
    I made a post then realised that it had nothing to do with the previous post which was taking the thread in a nice direction actually.

    Lol, I should always read before posting.
    I just have a feeling that sometimes my failures may not be caused by me not playing my cards right but external events, such as upsetting of the card table.

    In real life, there are many factors outside of one's control.
    I think perhaps I have become somewhat more immature recently.

    I never used to like the term maturity, as I felt that "immature" was too often a label used on those which we don't like.

    It is a sobering thought that this could be the case, and that I could be regressing.

    Perhaps it is the basics. Perhaps it is lack of sleep, etc.

    God, I just pray for your guidance and help.
    Jesus, God...

    Just help me will you?

    I pretty badly need some alcohol.

    Why do I imagine the worst? Because it is the most likely outcome.
    A ruined soup is always saved by soy sauce and chilli.

    Just like steak is always saved by Worcestershire sauce and pepper (and, the fact that it was Wagyu beef. Ooh, my wallet :p).
    Maybe I am an extrovert.

    Why post on a forum if I am not seeking human attention?
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