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Who not to listen to

Hadoblado

think again losers
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There are a lot of people on this planet. Most of them think they have something to say, but you've only got one lifetime and a finite supply of patience. You don't have the luxury of knowing whether what someone will say is valuable until you hear it, so you develop heuristics for who you listen to, and who you seek out for information. What are those heuristics?

I discount:
- people with anthropomorphised animal avatars
- people who capitalise words randomly
- people who state their views are true without explaining why they are true
 

QuickTwist

Spiritual "Woo"
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Artsu Tharaz

Resident Resident
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I'm not sure how serious the OP is.

Just read what people have to say, and if they say anything that strikes you as having value, let it sink in, and if they consistently say something valuable, then seek out more of what they have to say.

There aren't many people that I seek out the opinions of, and when I do it's usually highly intelligent people who are saying something that directly relates to the picture of the world that I'm forming in my mind. Most people don't say too much worth taking note of.
 

QuickTwist

Spiritual "Woo"
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I'm not sure how serious the OP is.

Just read what people have to say, and if they say anything that strikes you as having value, let it sink in, and if they consistently say something valuable, then seek out more of what they have to say.

There aren't many people that I seek out the opinions of, and when I do it's usually highly intelligent people who are saying something that directly relates to the picture of the world that I'm forming in my mind. Most people don't say too much worth taking note of.
From what I can tell, you have really only seeked me out more or less to disagree with me. Is this what you are talking about or no?
 

Artsu Tharaz

Resident Resident
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I'm not sure how serious the OP is.

Just read what people have to say, and if they say anything that strikes you as having value, let it sink in, and if they consistently say something valuable, then seek out more of what they have to say.

There aren't many people that I seek out the opinions of, and when I do it's usually highly intelligent people who are saying something that directly relates to the picture of the world that I'm forming in my mind. Most people don't say too much worth taking note of.
From what I can tell, you have really only seeked me out more or less to disagree with me. Is this what you are talking about or no?
I wasn't referring to you, but I don't ask for your opinion for the sake of disagreeing with you. I think you're perceptive and when you mention something that strikes me as interesting, although possibly also confusing, I want to know more about it. I don't set out looking for an argument. That being said I have a tendency to question things before I accept them, particularly if it goes against what I had already held to be the case.
 

QuickTwist

Spiritual "Woo"
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...
I'm not sure how serious the OP is.

Just read what people have to say, and if they say anything that strikes you as having value, let it sink in, and if they consistently say something valuable, then seek out more of what they have to say.

There aren't many people that I seek out the opinions of, and when I do it's usually highly intelligent people who are saying something that directly relates to the picture of the world that I'm forming in my mind. Most people don't say too much worth taking note of.
From what I can tell, you have really only seeked me out more or less to disagree with me. Is this what you are talking about or no?
I wasn't referring to you, but I don't ask for your opinion for the sake of disagreeing with you. I think you're perceptive and when you mention something that strikes me as interesting, although possibly also confusing, I want to know more about it. I don't set out looking for an argument. That being said I have a tendency to question things before I accept them, particularly if it goes against what I had already held to be the case.
Makes sense to me... :good:
 

Pizzabeak

Prolific Member
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2,529
It's best to just go for it anyway no matter that risk. It isn't so much faith as it is practice. It's easy to ruin a vibe or relationship with someone for lack of communication over time, or at the first instance. You can't argue your beliefs are right through stubbornness or illicit meat-headedness. Overtime if someone demonstrates a repeated behavioral pattern for no good, that could be looked at as an illness. You can't flip the switch and turn the tables to turn a chronic abuse role into a negative trait or characteristic to accuse. There's no excuse for any kind of gang type behavior. I just wouldn't trust people with certain tools. Face any consequences for relating wrong. It's not begging for sympathy and an addictive feeling people must crave, it can be immature and just out of tune. They say it takes a while to build trust. I wouldn't necessarily go about regarding anyone an expert for no good reason. There isn't much you can do to fix it after you take bad advice and ruin your life.
 

redbaron

irony based lifeform
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69S 69E
There are a lot of people on this planet. Most of them think they have something to say, but you've only got one lifetime and a finite supply of patience. You don't have the luxury of knowing whether what someone will say is valuable until you hear it, so you develop heuristics for who you listen to, and who you seek out for information. What are those heuristics?

I discount:
- people with anthropomorphised animal avatars
- people who capitalise words randomly
- people who state their views are true without explaining why they are true
1. furries are the future
2. agreed
3. mostly agreed

also people who are demonstrably incompetent in multiple ways, i'm unlikely to have much faith that they're competent in another way. most people probably have some strengths and weaknesses and i'm forgiving of outliers, but if incompetence is a rule and not an exception i'm likely to not want to listen
 

Polaris

Radioactive vision
Local time
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Messages
2,125
I never used to ignore people, but the way things have been evolving, there are now so many people on my ignore list that there's no real reason to hang around. It's not that I don't want to read the posts of people that I disagree with, it's the fact that these very vocal people are obviously more prolific, and unwilling to consider there may be other versions of truth out there. I have given up on discussion.

For that reason, I also don't spend too much time on the internet. I don't read blogs or other forums. I don't read the public comments sections because people behave differently online than in real life. It's like how people change their behaviour when they are driving a car. They feel safe in the metal box that they can use to escape situations very quickly, so they do stuff they normally wouldn't if they were just face to face with someone, and vulnerable.

I'm not interested in knowing the innermost thoughts of haters, but I support the right for them to express it, if they must. It just means I am always in a situation where I have to be the one who is "driving defensively", because someone always wants to express how much they want people different to themselves to be more like them.
 

Cognisant

Prolific Member
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Dec 12, 2009
Messages
8,399
-Subjectivists
-Sophists
-Religious People
-Members of the Mexican Midget Mafia
-Anyone less than half my age
-Anyone more than twice my age
-Women with unnaturally coloured hair
-Men who wear lycra
-The Voices
 

Thurlor

Nutter
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Jul 8, 2012
Messages
560
Location
Victoria, Australia
- People that believe there are multiple truths.
- People that insist all language is only descriptive.
- People who believe things for no good reason.
- People who value feelings over facts.
- People who believe all cultures are equal.
 

Adaire

still Adaire
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3,591
I don't listen to people who have gurus or want to be gurus.
Or people who are rude to service workers.
 

Niclmaki

Disturber of the Peace
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Oct 21, 2012
Messages
483
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Canada
I discount people who leave hugely massive walls of text. If it is formatted well it may get a cursory reading though.
 

washti

rr
Local time
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Sep 11, 2016
Messages
581
I don't have heuristics like that. Everyone has several chances for me to listen. Though I quickly distance myself in contact with people who persists in patterns like :

1. Present their preferences on the basis of contrast, discriminating other options in aggressive manner.

2. They don't understand that their preferences are not "reality" but their favorite version of reality that would be the most beneficial for them and which they would like to see as obligatory for others no matter how much on other's expence it would be.

3. They don't listen, dismissing someone by belittling his/her experience, patronizing person and covering themsellves under " just good humor"

4. They don't understand that a man is socio-biologically conditioned and a lot of the context of someone's life is inaccessible to us.

5. They don't understand that we always interpret stuff just through the selected aspects, giving them different weights depending on the situation. (Some are able to build only one perspective and glorify it whole life regardless of the undergoing changes)

6. They don''t understand that every truth has its foundation in assumption and you really need to work hard looking for evidence to prove it as possessing any worth.

7. They express and haphazardly change strong judgments under the influence of emotions and aftermath are not able to recognize it and reflect about it., repeating same shit over and over again. aka low integrity.

8. They tend to forget about how they behaved, always starting next interactions with the conviction that they have a "clean card" and everything is fine or just misunderstandings

9. They say everything is simple.

10. They talk about humans in depersonalized way, like props, tools etc

11. They don't understand that humans have different relations with their own bodies.

12. They can't imagine that if you have to "walk on the eggshells" all the time around someone it can mean that you are rude or mean not that this person is permanently oversensitive.
 

Hadoblado

think again losers
Local time
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- anything people say about themselves that they don't demonstrate
- anything negative people say about people they have disagreements with
 

redbaron

irony based lifeform
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people with watermelons for heads
 

Happy

ENTP
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Shallow grave
people who are rude to service workers.
This one x1000. I will just write someone off forever instantly if I witness them being rude to service workers.
 

The Grey Man

Well-Known Member
Local time
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Oct 6, 2014
Messages
633
Location
Canada
There are indeed a lot of people on this planet, but they're not all trying to talk to me at once, so I don't see the need for a filter. I find that the people who have trouble listening are the ones who won't stop talking themselves. I don't talk much, so it's easy for me to listen.
 

QuickTwist

Spiritual "Woo"
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...
-I typically don't really write people off unless I see they have abusive behavior towards me or others.

-I am not going to write someone off just because they disagree with me or my world view or have a different opinion of things than I do. I think people who disassociate themselves from others who don't share the same world view as themselves are doing themselves a disservice.

-Nth on the rude to service people, but I will probably not write them off just for that, but I might try and get them to change that behavior.
 

sushi

Well-Known Member
Local time
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Messages
564
your boss or superior. (i imply you mean not take their words seriously)

there is so much BS coming from rude and stupid people's mouths.

other people are just mirrors.
 

sushi

Well-Known Member
Local time
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Messages
564
if the person is not your ally, teacher/mentor, friend, you should not listen to him/her.

If his advice is full of crap and does not make sense and give u lectures that has no value, then you should not listen.
 

T.L-N.

U.S./Georgia.
Local time
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Joined
Jan 25, 2019
Messages
4
-Subjectivists
-Sophists
-Religious People
-Members of the Mexican Midget Mafia
-Anyone less than half my age
-Anyone more than twice my age
-Women with unnaturally coloured hair
-Men who wear lycra
-The Voices
That’s right you show those voices who’s boss.
 

redbaron

irony based lifeform
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that lady who orders a 1/8 strength extra hot almond cappucino with extra froth and just a little bit of chocolate who says, "im a barista"
 

lightfire

MUSHROOM PATROL
Local time
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332
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Papa Johns
-selfish, patronizing, arrogant, condescending, boastful people (includes boasting about being charitable)
-people who take others for granted, stomp all over people
-people who only talk about themselves and their accomplishments
-tragic inability for empathy and putting themselves in the shoes of another
I really do not like most people, and have to search up and down and under rocks for the genuine, humble, and unfake
 

Cognisant

Prolific Member
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8,399
I know right, it's so hard to find good listeners :D
 

Minuend

pat pat
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3,945
It depends, when I skimread stuff on forums, I usually read everything, unless what someone says is clearly disfragmented or written in a way that does not invite reading.

Broken clocks is even right twice a day etc. Sometimes people have a valid points even if they're retarded

If we're talking about who I seek out when I genuinely wonder about something, that's a very different story. There are people I know have more insight than others and I talk to them
 

computerhxr

Village Idiot
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Oct 21, 2014
Messages
726
Location
beyond space and time
I have a rule never to listen to
- People who have valid points.
- People with brilliant ideas.
- People who are successful.
- God.
- My own intuition.
- And especially people who can spell and have good grammar. They're the worst.
 

Animekitty

I am all of my perception (Sally 666)
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Messages
6,280
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subjective
- And especially people who can spell and have good grammar. They're the worst.
Best grammar best there ever was in the signature that belongs to is mine.

(subscribe to pewdiepie)

----------------

I tend to avoid:
- Selfish people
- Weasels
- Egotists
- Self Righteous people
- Intellectual Nihilists (sophists)
- Lost Causes
 

Lurker

Member
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Joined
Jan 12, 2017
Messages
56
I discount people who leave hugely massive walls of text. If it is formatted well it may get a cursory reading though.
Yes! It's almost rude to expect a reader to devote more than a glance at most posts Exceptions for blah....

Walls of text are irritating when the main point is buried in filler clauses and in irrelevant detail.

The affect on the reader is more than an eyeroll: I think the poster is trying to impress, or rambling without a central point. Random thoughts are great, but they should be introduced as such.

Some posters are overflowing with thoughts and ideas, but most of us have a few points to make. Rambling on too much alienates people
 

lightfire

MUSHROOM PATROL
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I really cant stand pretentious people, and people who steal others ideas and claim it as their own. There is no single thought of originality yet so much arrogance. From where? Idk! I have a couple of relatives who do this and I cant help but notice the lengths I go through to avoid them.
 

moody

Active Member
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Messages
125
  • anything people say about themselves that they don't demonstrate
  • anything negative people say about people they have disagreements with
If I don't know someone that well, I usually try to give the benefit of the doubt. Time shows if it is true or not.
people with watermelons for heads
XD
Broken clocks is even right twice a day etc. Sometimes people have a valid points even if they're retarded
This is true! Though, I usually focus on the "why" people think and say what they do rather than the "what."
I have a rule never to listen to
  • People who have valid points.
  • People with brilliant ideas.
  • People who are successful.
  • God.
  • My own intuition.
  • And especially people who can spell and have good grammar. They're the worst.
Brilliant! You don't learn anything from those.
Rambling on too much alienates people
...I believe I am guilty.
But it is never on purpose! Just kind of happens.....somehow....
 

QuickTwist

Spiritual "Woo"
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Messages
7,117
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...
I have a rule never to listen to
  • People who have valid points.
  • People with brilliant ideas.
  • People who are successful.
  • God.
  • My own intuition.
  • And especially people who can spell and have good grammar. They're the worst.
Don't you mean well-mannered grammar? Or is there something else I am missing?
 

Creeping Death

Consigliere
Local time
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Joined
Oct 10, 2016
Messages
816
Location
Omnipresent
-People who think being a parent makes them qualified to know their children's medical needs better than a doctor.
-Street salesmen
-The guy who comes up to my window every night grunting and whispering for an hour
-Anyone who's previously displayed dismissive body language towards me in past interactions
 

moody

Active Member
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Messages
125
-People who think being a parent makes them qualified to know their children's medical needs better than a doctor.
I know your probably referring to treatments and parents not wanting a certain treatment for their kids, (especially the people who refuse to vaccinate their kids), but I just HAVE to say that I’ve met a lot really dismissive doctors who have ignored major symptoms.....

When it comes to the diagnosis, parents know their kids better than a doctor, and they’ll be able to press an issue that a doctor would otherwise wave off. You can’t diagnose someone by ignoring half the symptoms. Doctors often due this when they’re just looking for certain words and not listening to the patient.
 

JohnnyLawrence

Active Member
Local time
Today, 22:10
Joined
Aug 15, 2018
Messages
108
-People who think being a parent makes them qualified to know their children's medical needs better than a doctor.
judging by the GP's i've seen being a doctor is easy

all you have to do is ask the patient what symptoms they are expressing

then you type those into a computer. Then the computer tells you what synthetic drugs you should get the patient to take to ease the symptoms
 
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