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Where is your truest self?

Beat Mango

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In other words, when do you feel like you're most yourself? Where do you feel most at home, so to speak?

I think my most honest self is when I am playing guitar, in particular, when I am jamming and improvising. Not all jams are equal, but when I'm jamming, especially when soloing, I am pouring myself into the notes and what comes out is "me" in its purest form.

Second to this is blogging or writing. When I am blogging, I am usually doing little more than letting my innermost thoughts spill out as they come. I'm often hesitant showing real life friends my blog because what I write there is so raw, unfiltered, naked. It's probably fair to say some people wouldn't know what to make of what I write there.

What these have in common, I think, is a lack of inhibition. I feel like I am giving to the world, and it is giving back in equal measure without me (my ego) having to act as a mediator. When I am socialising, for example, I often feel like what I'm giving out is not coming from my core. Even if I do happen to be having a good time and am feeling the moment, it's still coming from a more shallow place, the whole of me is not being revealed. When I am alone there is no mask, there is no inauthenticity, but I wouldn't say it's my truest self because I'm a bit empty, I'm not putting myself into something. It's like the energy is there, but not being expressed or utilised.

So yeah, when are you your truest self?
 
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when doing something artistic i think, any form of release (including art, and emo-complaining)
 

Fleur

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Sometimes I have a sensation that I have lost the ability to express
my truest self. Not because of pretending and having a permanent
mask; the reason is the constant self-restrainment I have been
forcing on myself all this time, and it is hard to put it aside,
regardless of how relaxed I feel.

Well...perhaps this self-restrainment is a mask after all.

I think I can truly be myself only when I have went into my own
world and lost the trace about what is happening around me, mostly
when I have an opportunity to go for my long walks: just pacing
along the road, listening to the tree sough and letting my mind wander.
Slumber is another option (not sure if it counts).
And drawing. Drawing doesn't require words.
 

Artifice Orisit

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Sleeping through the afternoon in a tree, dreaming about magic.

Being underwater a midnight, keeping myself down with a brick so I can enjoy the peace.
 

Ermine

is watching and taking notes
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I'm myself the most when I'm writing, making art, playing the piano, and when I'm posting here. In all these mediums, I lose all, or nearly all my fears and inhibitions.
 
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same here apart from on the forum (all my inhibitions remain intact)
 

truthseeker72

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I think this is one of those defining questions that help distinguish the personality types. Myself, I feel conncted to my true self when I'm reading, writing, and exercising. The last activity may not seem to fit, but a good workout is very cathartic.
 

Inappropriate Behavior

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When I'm daydreaming. Which I do when I'm driving alone, exercising ^^ or being creative in some way. Although I have gotten better at being myself in just about any situation as I no longer worry about it as much.
 

Waterstiller

... runs deep
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Aimlessly playing an instrument, journaling, driving alone.. Same as others here.
 

Beat Mango

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It's more than just being without fears and inhibitions though - I don't have fears and inhibitions playing sport, but it doesn't quite get to my core like music or writing does. And I'm not just talking about being yourself, but expressing yourself - or is that less of a concern for other people here?
 

PaX_Vita

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i believe for us (intp) to truly attain self fulfilling time is when idiots are not present: when you guys are doing art, writing, playing music and other activities, not including others, this is when most of us are truly fulfilled. lets face it, most of your friends, relatives, spouses even has a very high chance not able themselves to understand your prospective or concept on how you do things the way you do them. they always have to insist of knowing; why is that or how is that and if you do explain to them it takes them a huge amount of time to get what your getting at or abandon their pursuit of understanding your concept all together, which in both cases the fun and fulfillment are gone...though if someone does understand you and can relate to your concepts, even if yours and theirs are contradictory, then that is one instance that other individuals are allowed in your self fulfilling time.

self fulfilling time = truest self


* note to all* this is my perceptive regarding the question if you do not agree i highly recommend that you argue with me and if you do agree post specific example "] (sorry for the grammar)
 

Xel

When in the course of inhuman events....
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I think when I'm alone pacing around my house. Or when I'm playing video games well (if I'm doing badly its more like the super negative spiteful me)
 

echoplex

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Whenever I'm most able to drift off into a creative daydream. I can't really do that around people. I find I do it alot when I listen to music, especially with headphones.

I suppose the closet I come to expressing this around others is when they are lucky enough to hear the carefully chosen remnants of my daydreams. I don't think I've met anyone I feel comfortable sharing much with though. :(
 

drumir93

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I feel my truest self when I get swept up in a drawing Iv'e made so much that the lines I make are barely a conscious decision.
When I listen to my favorite music and get caught in a day dream(like said above).
When I play the piano that I barely even know how to play but still sounds good when I make things up on it.
When I'm hanging out with one of my only two friends.
When I'm reading fascinating old books, like the art of war.
when watching my childhood cartoons, and thinking about who i was then, and what iv'e become (i actually like who iv'e become)
and also, when playing old videogames from the 80s,which had a much bigger effect on me than the tv shows.
 

Enne

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In other words, when do you feel like you're most yourself? Where do you feel most at home, so to speak?

I honestly have no idea. My sense of self is undergoing a lot of change. =/
 

brain enclosed in flesh

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When I am writing fiction freely with no concern as to whether it makes sense and yet, it still manages to do so.

When I am in the form of another character, I feel free to be my truest self.
 

wadlez

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When making halarious creative jokes with my friends. With a few people in the right situation, I can get into a state where I can express completly sponataneous ideas or jokes.
When im in a state of flow thinking of some abstract theory.

I think that people only feel like they are being themselves when they are doing well. Your self concept has to be acceptable to you, people only like to think that they were being there 'true' selves when they were not doing something embarrasing. When you think of someone you know, do you also filter the negative aspects when summarising who they are? of course not.
 

Enne

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Hmm..on second thought I guess I could say in my head..
 

Chimera

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Huh. Trying to think of a response actually sort of bothered me.
I can't actually figure out who my true self is. Am I ever not being myself? Isn't everything I do just another facet of who I am? How you react to a situation is still self expression. . .
When I draw, I am an analyzer. I am critical and creative at the same time; all outside thought shuts off. Is that the truest expression of who I am? Just because I'm pulling a picture out of my head and forcing it onto paper? When I play on the piano, is the music a representation of who I am, just because I'm putting into words things I could never say?
Or am I truest to myself when I'm secretive, and won't allow anyone into my thoughts? Truest to one's self...I don't understand. If I am a secretive person, how can I say that I'm truest to myself when I allow emotional expression to flow freely? Wouldn't it be more accurate to say that I express myself more when I'm in a social setting and keeping to myself? That is part of who I am, after all. Keeping to myself would be expression. Everything I do is expression of who I am; doesn't the amount depend on whether I'm conscious of the expression or not?

Oh in the name of all that's holy. . .see, this is why I shouldn't be thinking this late at night. Sorry for the question barf.
 

fullerene

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this "late at night"? I know we're in the same time zone, missy. Don't act like we didn't both opt out of sleeping last night ;).

*collapses in bed*

[/derailment]
 

Fedayeen

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There are many sides to me, I don't know if any one of them is any more true then any other. They all exist, and they exist independantly of one another.
 

Beat Mango

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Huh. Trying to think of a response actually sort of bothered me.
I can't actually figure out who my true self is. Am I ever not being myself? Isn't everything I do just another facet of who I am? How you react to a situation is still self expression. . .
When I draw, I am an analyzer. I am critical and creative at the same time; all outside thought shuts off. Is that the truest expression of who I am? Just because I'm pulling a picture out of my head and forcing it onto paper? When I play on the piano, is the music a representation of who I am, just because I'm putting into words things I could never say?
Or am I truest to myself when I'm secretive, and won't allow anyone into my thoughts? Truest to one's self...I don't understand. If I am a secretive person, how can I say that I'm truest to myself when I allow emotional expression to flow freely? Wouldn't it be more accurate to say that I express myself more when I'm in a social setting and keeping to myself? That is part of who I am, after all. Keeping to myself would be expression. Everything I do is expression of who I am; doesn't the amount depend on whether I'm conscious of the expression or not?

Oh in the name of all that's holy. . .see, this is why I shouldn't be thinking this late at night. Sorry for the question barf.

I meant when do you feel you're being most honest - damn INTPs!
 

Elektra

Deeply superficial
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When I write something, might be an e-mail or a post or something
 

Felan

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I'm my truest self when I'm designing a software program, a bit less when I'm actually coding it. Sometimes I have moments of creative paralysis that in that process that elicit genuine panic because of how much esteem I gain from doing it.
 
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I feel most like my honest self when I'm sleeping, traveling, tripping, walking, smoking, vaporizing, playing games, cooking, martial arts, researching, seeking out rare things, listening to music, or reaching a specific level of drunkenness.
 

Eljua

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I don't think I've ever been my true self. I've been aware I've been lying to myself when questioning my own motives over stuff, but I don't think I've ever been in a situation where I'm not wearing a mask. Even when I'm daydreaming I'm creating a fictionalised persona of my ideal self who reacts to situations in perfectly defined ways, none of which are truly me.

Then again, maybe I am the mask, and in an attempt to see me I've been avoiding the stark truth glaring down at me from an unreachable distance.
 

Tyria

Ryuusa bakuryuu
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I don't know where my truest self is because I'm not sure which self it is. Is it the one that others see, the one that others talk about, the one that I see in a mirror, the one that I think I am?

Fragmants. Shards. Pieces of identity. Do I want to understand myself, to be understood, or to only be?

I suppose my truest self would be in honesty. I know no other self that is more true than that.
 

Salwan

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When I'm writing code, with ambient trance music playing, and I sync the movement of my fingers on the keyboard with the beats, I loss all connection with my surroundings, where am I or who am I does not matter anymore, just my logical thoughts and the code... But for some reason, I can't get into that state on purpose, it just happens, if you know what I mean.
 

Beat Mango

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Gee I'm feeling bitter and cynical right now, and at the same time, extremely honest. I think this is my most honest self, it takes no effort whatsoever for me to be a bitter, twisted, over-thinking cynic. I think the me vs. the world thing works for me, I feel so energised.
 
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