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~The Melkor BIRTHDAY club~

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Cognisant

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

*hits Melkor over the back of the head with a lead pipe*

It's tradition.

*holds up a photo depicting how Melkor was struck this way approximately a decade ago, although interestingly a time machine can be seen in the background and the pipe wielder looks familiar*
 

Philosophyking87

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

What an utterly ridiculous, stupid idea. That is all.
 

Cognisant

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

You came to wallow in the mud only to complain that it's dirty?
 

Alice?

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

Wow, playing in the mud AND squishy heads? Count me in.
 

BigApplePi

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

Ahhhhh. I am not a loose cannon, meerly a law unto himself.:pistols: And what is the job?:D
I'm going to have to apologize then. It's that weak INTP poor judgment that comes out once in a while. You are NOT a loose cannon.

Glad you are available for a job. I'm been observing your meaner demeanor. I want to hire you to give Melkor a body massage. Head to toe missing nothing. I want you to do something to relax him and stiffen his resolve. I hope your fee is low as I can't afford much.
 

BigApplePi

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Words

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

This dimension, I feel hard to enter.
 

Crazythinker1

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

Glad you are available for a job. I'm been observing your meaner demeanor. I want to hire you to give Melkor a body massage. Head to toe missing nothing. I want you to do something to relax him and stiffen his resolve. I hope your fee is low as I can't afford much.

OH HELLLLLL NO!!!!!
 

Minuend

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

Too bad, I was hoping to see some Crazythinker1 on Melkor action... Preferable in the mud.
 

BigApplePi

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

Too bad, I was hoping to see some Crazythinker1 on Melkor action... Preferable in the mud.
Sorry Minuend. I was hoping to clear up the situation but turns out it is muddier than ever.
 

Crazythinker1

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

My god man!!!! I do have some standards. And what, may I ask, situation were you trying to clear up?
 
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Cavallier

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

*rises up out of the delicious gore covering the club room's floor*

Bored now.

*Rips the unconscious Melkorling's arms off with a satisfying crunch and beats CrazyT to a pulp with them*

Hmmm....still bored.

*punches a hole in PK's chest and pulls out his festering entrails then wraps them around BAPs neck slowly tightening them till his head lolls to the side like a child's toy*

I'm hungry.

*cuddles one of BAP's eyeballs to her chest*

They always seem bigger when outside their holster.

*pops it into her mouth spitting out the hard pit...licks lips and grins like hell*

Oops. Forgot one.

*performs an ornate back flip tuck and tumble before rising up and jabbing Cog in the nose with her left foot...slowly slides back in to the muck*
 

Melkor

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

ENOUGH!


There will be no more of this...this...

madness? Chaos? Murder? Subversion?

Oh..hold on...

What I mean is, great job everyone, do carry on!


Now, it seems we have a 'stick in the mud', namely the self proclaimed king whom would throw his philosophy on us!

Have at him!

Also, Melkor on Ct action?:x

WHAT!!!!?

You know what I think?

Mineud wants my babies...

You know what else?

Bi has implanted some sort of monitoring software in Crazy's retina, and not long after this action he recruited the miserable sod to perform somewhat erotic actions on me!

By this logic, Bi simply wants to spy on a vunerable Melkor, and thus, he wants my babies.

Also, without any sort of explanation as to why,
Cavallier, wants my babies, seriously.

I'm watching you all.
 

Cognisant

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

By this logic, Bi simply wants to spy on a vunerable Melkor, and thus, he wants my babies.
I'm watching you all.
Sooo... evidently Melkor wants all our babies.
 

Melkor

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

I don't know the answer to that insinuation.



I mean, who could resist my babies?:D



jelly_babies_bag.jpg




None of you certainley!
 

Cognisant

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

And inside the bag....

Baby_by_Santani.jpg
 

Melkor

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

HOLY SHIT!

JESUS MARY AND JOSEPH!


That scared me.


Fuck you OreSama.


(Seriously, where did you get pictures of Lor/Noddy's other lovechild?)
 

Alice?

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

And inside the bag....

Baby_by_Santani.jpg

As if it wasn't scary enough already, the thing has a goddamn ARISTOTLE'S LANTERN for a mouth... *shivers*

Dear gods, it's like a sea urchin mated with a fetus in fetu.
 

Crazythinker1

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

Awwwww, Melkor! You and Bigapplepi's love child is............is..........is.......... well acutually the thing is butt ugly, but I can see the family resemblence to you!!!
 

Minuend

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

Oh, sweet, innocent Melkor, to think that my plan is such a unsophisticated one. If I wanted your babies, I'd just make you go to sleep with magical fairy dust and take whatever I needed...... to clone you of course.

Also, I believe this Floor of Gore created by Cavallier could use some flowers *sprinkles daffodils around*. I must say it's a nice addition to this rather empty castle. Maybe we should have a Room of Doom as well?
 

BigApplePi

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

.... Club Haiku ....

Drunk with Power I
Must seek to destroy whatever
Gentler forgettings

Oh, sweet, innocent Melkor, to think that my plan is such a unsophisticated one. If I wanted your babies, I'd just make you go to sleep with magical fairy dust and take whatever I needed...... to clone you of course.

Also, I believe this Floor of Gore created by Cavallier could use some flowers *sprinkles daffodils around*. I must say it's a nice addition to this rather empty castle. Maybe we should have a Room of Doom as well?
 

Minuend

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

Very well, my red friend. I suggest we try to climb the hierarchy. But to do that, we have to eliminate some higher ups. I believe we should take out that self-righteous-time-machine-owning-hat-loving curator of ancient club-related history!
*runs over Oresama with overlord tank*

I also see some romantic interest between CrazyT and Alice, we should take advantage of that! *swiftly summons upon the wrath of the fjords to engulf them both*

Ahhhhh, the power is mine..err ours!!!
 

BigApplePi

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Cavallier

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

:pueh: Tanks and fjords are the best you've got? Pfft.
 

BigApplePi

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

:pueh: Tanks and fjords are the best you've got? Pfft.

Certainly not. I prefer to keep my heaviest armor in reserve as a surprise. (You know. Talk softly, carry a big stick.):rolleyes: Are you willing to back me up Cavallier? :D Melkor can use as as much protection as he get get considering his present vulnerability.:storks:
 

Crazythinker1

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

I also see some romantic interest between CrazyT and Alice, we should take advantage of that! *swiftly summons upon the wrath of the fjords to engulf them both*

HUH?
 

Cavallier

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

CT and Alice sitting in a tree...:dontbelieve:

I can only imagine how painful it will be for the Melkorling to give birth to everybody's spawn. :D
 

Tyria

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

As if it wasn't scary enough already, the thing has a goddamn ARISTOTLE'S LANTERN for a mouth... *shivers*

Dear gods, it's like a sea urchin mated with a fetus in fetu.

Yeah, that's a rather disturbing seaurchin love child. Only the darkest depths of the internet could spawn such a thing.
 

walfin

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

Why does every post in here seem sexual in some way?
 

Cavallier

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

Why does every post in here seem sexual in some way?

It's the Melkorling. He spreads it like a disease. :D
 

Alice?

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

CT and Alice sitting in a tree...:dontbelieve:

I can only imagine how painful it will be for the Melkorling to give birth to everybody's spawn. :D

Awwwkwaard, haha.
Sorry CT, but I'm taken ;).
 

y4r5xeym5

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Crazythinker1

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

Awwwkwaard, haha.
Sorry CT, but I'm taken ;).

*shrugs*

Story of my life. :(

However I'm sorta taken as well so..........

I'm still trying to figure out where they got the idea in the first place.:confused:
 
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Melkor

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

Yes!

Alice is mine!

MINE-MINE-MINE!

*Puts a property of Melkor stamp on Alice’s palm, and then places monopoly houses on her head*


SEE!

MINE!

Also, Fukyo, have you got Anthile syndrome?

You seem to be communicating through links rather than sentences...

Oh...yeah...

*Sticks Alice in a sack and begins to climb a tall building, while tense actions music plays.
Contrary to popular protocol, he decides to use a combination of the stairs, the elevator, and parallel windowing.*
 

y4r5xeym5

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

Oh hush, Bradley. People will start to get strange ideas ;).

Strange ideas? But what could they....ooh....Why would anyone ever think that? ;)
 

Minuend

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

:pueh: Tanks and fjords are the best you've got? Pfft.

*gasp* Such insolence cannot be tolerated!

*Summons Thor, Tyr and Freyr*

*Tyr uses Gleipnir to entangle Cavallier, making her unable to move*
*Freyr calls cumulonimbus clouds which creates heavy rain and dominant thunder*
*Thor gathers lightning in Mjolnir which he throws at Cavallier*

*Watches Cavallier being smashed and electrocuted*

Well, that was a lot of work for nothing.
 

Cavallier

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

Well, that was a lot of work for nothing.

Indeed. It was.

*Cav concentrates for a moment...Minuend's assorted lackeys burst into flame*

*Cav pokes Minuend in the eye*

:p

Now for a tsunami to wipe away the rest of these interlopers so I can get back to reading...
 

Alice?

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

*Sticks Alice in a sack and begins to climb a tall building, while tense actions music plays.
Contrary to popular protocol, he decides to use a combination of the stairs, the elevator, and parallel windowing.*

But... but... I don't want to be in a sack. *wails*
 

y4r5xeym5

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

You could always leap out of the sack and blind Melkor with the sack. Then, once he begins to lose his balance, Spartan kick him off the building and fly off into the sunset.

Alice? can fly. True fact.


I'm also going to a banquet tonight. I'll see what epicness I can procure from the photographers.
 

Melkor

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

*Kicks y4* through an open window and ties Alice's sack a little tighter, adding a few rabid Fossa to keep her entertained*


(Thats right, you're so insignificant I didn;t even bother to type your whole name!Bwahaha!)

*Continues on his perilious journey, now with added and cliche psychotic ramblings*


"They called me mad! MAD!
gagahahahaha!"

"I'll show them, I'll show them all!"

"HOPE YOU'RE WATCHING MOTHER! HAHAHAHAHAHA!"
 

Minuend

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

Indeed. It was.

*Cav concentrates for a moment...Minuend's assorted lackeys burst into flame*

*Cav pokes Minuend in the eye*

You may have robbed me of my depth vision, but you will never have my soul!!!

"HOPE YOU'RE WATCHING MOTHER! HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Must you always pester me so?
 

Cavallier

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

You may have robbed me of my depth vision, but you will never have my soul!!!

Wait. You have a soul?

MELKORLING!!! One sneaked in with a SOUL!!!

Eww.

We needs must kick the soul carrying fiend out!

*kicks Mini in the knee*
 

Crazythinker1

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Re: ~The Melkor club~

*flies up to melkor wearing his newly invented anti gravity boots and shakes his head in disgust*

Who the hell do you think you are? King Kong or something?

*grabs sack and then kicks legs out from under melkor. watches him drop till he hits the pavement*

OOOOOOOO. That had to HURT!

* flys to roof and releases Alice? from her prison, bows, and flies off into the sunset*
 
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