Socially Awkward Introduction

[Zygomorphic]

Hello, I am a 17-year old male just starting to finish up high school. I've been interested in typology since around August, and only these past couple of weeks have I been really interested enough to join in on the fun.

I imagine I will mostly be spending time in the Philosophy/Psychology sub-forums as these are my key areas of interest - if all goes well, I'd like to design my own major in college incorporating neuroscience, philosophy, and maybe even psychoanalysis. I expect to gain a lot from these typology forums (I'm lurking all the other IN forums as well...) as I already have. Considering how socially isolated I am at the moment, I feel - okay, think - as though this will be a place where I can actually engage in intellectually stimulating discourse.

This social awkwardness I have is really only directed towards my peers/other adolescents. I look up to adults a lot more because I see them as almost sagely figures who can impart greater wisdom upon me. Unfortunately, I am painfully aware that most adults do not/will not reciprocate my belief that we can commune as mental peers. Fortunate it is, then, that this forum serves very much as an age-equalizer!

My quest: to discover the purpose of life (at least mine), to live a quiet life filled with powerful nuance and depth, to find deep harmony and joy within myself, and to find love that mirrors the aforementioned depth, nuance, and harmony. I do not believe I will ever know true happiness if even one of those fundamental factors is missing from my life. At the moment, only one of those factors might be fulfilled; the very first. Of course, I realize it may be too early in life and certainly even sophomoric to suggest I have found that meaning/purpose, but that is why I am here: to continually shape and perfect this fundamental view, for what more important question is there than, "What is the purpose of life?" Hence my avatar - I am constantly questioning why I have a need to question myself as well as to question others' questionings. I genuinely believe the audience here can contribute to this. I eagerly anticipate these potential, future discussions.

Some stuff about me:

- I don't like math! I'm not quite sure why, but I suspect it may be that I do not appreciate how linear the process is. However, I certainly appreciate logical process, what keeps me so fascinated by it is that there are so many different approaches and perspectives. What I do like, on the other hand, are subjects that can contribute to my world view and philosophies: biology, physics (without most of the math), English, psychology, and interestingly even government at the moment (I had expected to appreciate the practicality of economics and detest the political process of government, but as it turns out money is insanely boring to talk about, while political science is so psychological and philosophical!). Okay, so maybe there is some fascinating algorithm that defines everything in the universe - just let me know when you figure that out!

- I tend to feel very old - not necessarily mentally or physically, but as if I have endured enough emotional trauma and painful experiences and would like to "retire" from it all (who wouldn't...?). Through college, I hope my "youth" might be restored and my constant wonder of the world ever-more catalyzed.

- Music. If there has been anything important that has occurred to me throughout secondary school, it has been the discovery of electronic music. I'm not talking about poppy, commercial rave music, over-glorified bass, and hedonistic drug abusers, but the classics and avant-garde of real techno and house hailing from the streets of Detroit and Chicago, ambient touched by the hands of Western-European mystics, and the virgin child of the three - trance of the 90's. I have yet to have met anyone to actually discuss my music with; there will be instant respect for any who listens to this stuff! I expect to bring the topic of music up in the future...

And that's about all I have to say for now.

 

[Da Blob]

Welcome potential sage larvae!

 

[nickgray]

- I don't like math! I'm not quite sure why, but I suspect it may be that I do not appreciate how linear the process is

Math isn't always about cracking equations in a certain way. It's about ideas and appreciation of these ideas. Take some basic number and set theories - really fascinating stuff.

to discover the meaning of life

There is none

And, uh... welcome. I'm not quite sure I have a privilege of welcoming new users yet

 

[Zygomorphic]

There is none

I should say purpose; the "meaning of life," is a sort of silly discussion. Purpose, on the other hand, is something different.

As for math, calculus so far has actually been slightly making me appreciate the subject more, particularly derivatives as relating to change, and there have been those few impressionable moments where it's amazing how everything "makes sense." But I'm not quite convinced yet - perhaps you might change this?

 

[JUN]

All we have in our lives, really have, is a silly hedonistic purpose and harmony.
The rest is up to you.
Welcome.

 

[Anthile]

Don't wait on the threshold
Come stay in the dark
Come forth in the hallways
And receive your mark

There are many rooms in our house
There are many voices calling out

For you who are lost and you are seen
You have been chosen by those inbetween

Like a crow perched on the gallows
We await your fall with glee
We've lured you in the shallows
10.000 voices call to thee​

 

[transformers]

Welcome. You're almost certainly an INFP

Also, something you really ought to know right now before you go any further in life: Adults don't know jack about the world. Experience counts for a lot, but age comparatively very little, so let go of this idea that age equals wisdom.

 

[Da Blob]

Welcome. You're almost certainly an INFP

Also, something you really ought to know right now before you go any further in life: Adults don't know jack about the world. Experience counts for a lot, but age comparatively very little, so let go of this idea that age equals wisdom.

Actually in some environments, age does equate to wisdom. Only the Wise survive to Age...

 

[bananaphallus]

Actually in some environments, age does equate to wisdom. Only the Wise survive to Age...

I'm of the opinion that age is an accurate indicator of how many years its been since said person was born, very little/nothing else.

But, I'm also an ignorant, 20 y/o twat.

 

[Zygomorphic]

I have debated whether I really am an INFP or an INTP. It may be that I am truly an INFP, with only a developed Ti, because I truly do only show my Ti side to the world. I recall being a rather emotional child back in the day, but my emotions are usually suppressed in every day life now. Usually. However, all of the tests point to INTP, and I think I may have to agree with them since I really do view my emotions objectively, even as a different individual from me which I often place in a higher regard than "myself." As hedonistic individuals, is it not logical that we should ultimately seek to foster and fulfill happiness in life?

Emotion though, is a strange thing to me. I can be extremely empathetic towards others, but only when I logically know that any emotional pain they are experiencing is actually worthy of sympathy. On the other hand, people who choose to display emotion so often and so banally perplex me and make me feel uncomfortable.

INTP by day, INFP by night, I suppose...?

But ultimately whether I am Fi or Te does not matter too much to me. But if anyone thinks they can ask something that would truly be a polarizing question, feel free to ask! That being said, I still think I will find this forum more interesting than the INFP forum.

As for the age dilemma, I am also aware that not all (maybe even most) adults know much. However, it seems as if the only direct wisdom I have ever received has come from them. Thus, I am still selective about which adults I may be willing to open up to.

 

[transformers]

Actually in some environments, age does equate to wisdom. Only the Wise survive to Age...

You're implying causality where there is none. Age does not equal wisdom, it merely coincides with it much of the time because the older you get, the more challenges you tend to face and the more experience you gain in overcoming them. That overcoming of problems is what leads to wisdom, not age itself. Age is incidental.

Anyway, OP, you're welcome here no matter what your type. I tend to think you're an INFP though because of the way you speak (although that may just be a reflection of your age. teenagers tend to be a bit more Infpish in general) This sentence in particular is very revealing:

My quest: to discover the purpose of life (at least mine), to live a quiet life filled with powerful nuance and depth, to find deep harmony and joy within myself, and to find love that mirrors the aforementioned depth, nuance, and harmony.

Classic INFP statement. Your focus on happiness being the end goal of life is also typical. I think you're an INFP with a developed Te.

 

[RubberDucky451]

I too have a love for logic but a dislike towards math.

I'm also a 17 year old male

 

[Reverse Transcriptase]

You're implying causality where there is none. Age does not equal wisdom, it merely coincides with it much of the time because the older you get, the more challenges you tend to face and the more experience you gain in overcoming them. That overcoming of problems is what leads to wisdom, not age itself. Age is incidental.

No no, look at what he said again. He means that the people without wisdom DIE (I imagine it'd be a more ruthless civilization he's describing) so the people who are old are the people who were wise enough to get through the challenges. Thus, there is a correlation between age and wisdom. Sure, it's not causality... but it's almost causality. Aging -> life/death challenges -> if you live, you're proving you have some wisdom. Rinse & repeat.

and welcome! ^^;

 

[transformers]

No no, look at what he said again. He means that the people without wisdom DIE (I imagine it'd be a more ruthless civilization he's describing) so the people who are old are the people who were wise enough to get through the challenges. Thus, there is a correlation between age and wisdom. Sure, it's not causality... but it's almost causality. Aging -> life/death challenges -> if you live, you're proving you have some wisdom. Rinse & repeat.

and welcome! ^^;

But that's not always true. People are sometimes born into situations which continually support their existence, so their survival into old age has less to do with them and more to do with the social and economic systems surrounding them. Age doesn't necessarily have anything to do with wisdom.