INTPs and the subsequent hangover

[pjoa09]

I was at a club and got really shit faced for no other reason than trying to blend in.


Didn't intend on drinking that much but I felt like a real odd ball standing around and incapable of enjoying myself.

It's just so damn awkward otherwise.

Relate?

 

[downsowf]

I didn't know this was an INTP thing. I just thought I had a drinking problem.

 

[Meer]

Forget the clubs. Drinking alone is much better.

 

[Ex-User (4771)]

related

Forget the clubs. Drinking alone is much better.

so true, so very true

 

[EditorOne]

Short version: A lot of us don't fit the chemical dependency definition of addiction, but we drink or otherwise alter ourselves out of, again short version, boredom or an odd kind of aversion to sensory input or something. As usual when I stumbled across the highly plausible explanation I absorbed the epiphany and now forget the details. There is also no denying that alcohol seems to loosen our social inhibitions and give us something we're conditioned to believe we need, ie., gregariousness or whatever, therefore it can have tremendous appeal or attraction at times when we're feeling particularly isolated, which for some of us at some stages of life is a powerful motivator.

Second short version: The solution seems to be the same as for a true chemical addiction: Just stop. There is a period of yearning one has to pass through, and also, being INTPs, we are quite clever about convincing ourselves that since we've gone three weeks without it, we obviously aren't alcoholics, so one drink won't hurt. However, being INTP, that first drink feels so fine we just have to have another, etc.

I just quit. Among other things, I figured out that 1. I don't have time for this shit and 2. Who I present as when drinking is not who I am, which eventually embedded itself in my brain as "fraud," which I didn't like the sound of.

Your mileage may vary. Information offered for comparative analysis.

PS Pure pain killing drugs like Vicodin and Percoset, which I've had some past-year exposure to due to knee surgery, had no attraction or hold other than making the pain lessen when it got too much for too long. Your mileage on that stuff may also vary, again offered just as information to be processed.
​

 

[Dapper Dan]

As usual when I stumbled across the highly plausible explanation I absorbed the epiphany and now forget the details.​

"Yeah, I figured out a plausible explanation for life and the universe. No I don't remember what it was. Let me think for a second."

Too close to home, man. -_-

 

[crippli]

I don't think I have an alcohol problem, although I have been accused around these forums for 'are you drunk again?". Although that was true, I didn't acknowledge this. I'm not sure if there is any point to admit to being drunk. Then I'm fairly certainly they are not going to take the argument seriously. also not convinced how relevant it is.

 

[Sali]

I think this is probably the case for a lot of introverts.

 

[Hadoblado]

I binge drink really hard. I am by no means an alcoholic, but every time I do drink I have upward of twenty standard drinks. Being stupid is fun.

 

[pjoa09]

Second short version: The solution seems to be the same as for a true chemical addiction: Just stop. There is a period of yearning one has to pass through, and also, being INTPs, we are quite clever about convincing ourselves that since we've gone three weeks without it, we obviously aren't alcoholics, so one drink won't hurt. However, being INTP, that first drink feels so fine we just have to have another, etc.

​

I don't actually have any compulsion towards alcohol at all in such amounts that I consume when I am forced into a clubbing scenario.

I admit I have drank by myself but in very minute amounts. I do it to feel independent somehow... but that is a different story.

It's more of an anxiety thing than anything else. Where I feel like I am wound up and defensive in a gregarious environment. The first thing I end up doing is finding out the best way to "fuck myself up". I've always remembered the last night no matter how much I drank and as a result I end up having remorse and a hangover at the same time.

I enjoy clubbing but I wasn't quite so sure about why I can't keep the alcohol intake in control and have good time rather than wake up with a "oh my god, I was such an idiot that night" moment.

 

[downsowf]

I binge drink really hard. I am by no means an alcoholic, but every time I do drink I have upward of twenty standard drinks. Being stupid is fun.

I think I'm sort of the same way. If I do go out, I drink pretty heavily. Of course this means I'll smoke a shit load of cigarettes as well.

Like the OP, there is definitely an awkwardness I feel in social situations. Drinking helps. I don't find too much wrong with this. My friends and I talk about this all the time whether it's weird that we have to drink to have fun if we are at a party.

Another part of it, is I hate chit chat. So alcohol makes me more approachable and receptive to this. I think this is why smoking cigarettes in social situations has become something compulsive. So it looks like I have something to do instead of having to talk to people. Usually, I like to stay away from big parties/crowds, but if you want to be a part of this world, you cannot avoid them.

Like E1 said, I could go for weeks or so without drinking or feeling compelled to drink. I do have a problem with excess, though, and drinking is no exception. For instance, for me it's hard to find balance. I'm either an excess introvert hiding in my cave not going out for a long period. Or I am the guy who wants to go out and drink heavily. The best is when I can just hang out with my group of friends without having to go to the bars.

Right now, though, for me, my excess drinking has been excessive. I have been on winter break from law school. All the people that I haven't been able to hang out with in a long time want to "catch up," so for the past few weeks I have been sleeping late, drinking till the morning, then same routine.

And all these damn holiday parties aren't helping I guess. I never thought I'd say that I can't wait to start back school again to get some balance back in my life. haha.

Somehow this just turned into a venting thread. oops.

 

[EmergingAlbert]

I was at a club and got really shit faced for no other reason than trying to blend in.


Didn't intend on drinking that much but I felt like a real odd ball standing around and incapable of enjoying myself.

It's just so damn awkward otherwise.

Relate?

Wait...an INTP trying to fit in? That sounds like a complete disaster. That's the last thing I would ever try to do.

I do drink, but not to try to fit in. I drink for three reasons:
1. I enjoy the taste of some alcoholic drinks, so I'll have something like a beer or a glass of wine with my dinner just to enjoy like any nonalcoholic drink.
2. Boredom. Drinking really does make things less boring when you're bored.
3. It's a social lubricant. Sometimes I want the courage to talk to people that I usually wouldn't, or to get out and dance on the dance floor. Alcohol usually helps with that.

Wanting to fit in is the last reason I would ever drink...or ever do anything at all for that matter.

 

[pjoa09]

Wait...an INTP trying to fit in? That sounds like a complete disaster. That's the last thing I would ever try to do.

I do drink, but not to try to fit in. I drink for three reasons:
1. I enjoy the taste of some alcoholic drinks, so I'll have something like a beer or a glass of wine with my dinner just to enjoy like any nonalcoholic drink.
2. Boredom. Drinking really does make things less boring when you're bored.
3. It's a social lubricant. Sometimes I want the courage to talk to people that I usually wouldn't, or to get out and dance on the dance floor. Alcohol usually helps with that.

Wanting to fit in is the last reason I would ever drink...or ever do anything at all for that matter.

The awkwardness of standing in a crowd of alcoholically intoxicated strangers and friends dancing their wits off was a bit unbearable.

I felt like an oddball who isn't capable of enjoying the loud techno that I once was so fond of while everyone else was having a great time.

 

[EditorOne]

"I enjoy clubbing but I wasn't quite so sure about why I can't keep the alcohol intake in control and have good time rather than wake up with a "oh my god, I was such an idiot that night" moment"

Well, thinking about it, it sounds like it's not regret at the consumption of alcohol but regret at being an idiot. That might sound obvious, but it isn't. There's another thread on here called "socializer's remorse." Your hangover isn't simply a physical reaction to abusing your body, it's psychological regret at behaving in ways your normal self regards warily. A kind of self betrayal, or at least that's the bedrock foundation for your bad feelings. If you regard the process with awareness and look at it as a something you're doing that might teach you how to more easily function in a very non-INTP world, it might kick your remorse back into a corner where it can be managed. It might be more difficult to stop drinking sooner during each "lesson." Before your core intuitive function drowns beneath the alcohol, listen to it: When you've reached the point where you're comfortable around people, switch to something nonalcoholic, just to have something in your hand and something to take a swig of. Level it off. Otherwise every time it's a downhill ride into a stone wall.