How can you gently let down an F type?

[Kianara]

Last night I was skyping with one of my best friends, an ISFJ. We're really close and get along very well considering type differences. Last night, however, she was going on about love and friendship. She'd gone online and looked up various friendship-love quotes and was pasting them into Skype.

She'd offended me the day before, but I'd forgiven her fairly quickly (I hold no grudges). I can only assume that this overflow of feeling was her way of saying sorry and an expression of her love. But really now.

"To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world."

then, "That's what you are to me, Kia. ^_^"

After that I was kind of dying inside. It's like, "Okay. Love you too. I get it. Now STOP!" I think it's impossible for me to take so much feeling in one place without exploding. Thankfully I was on the phone with Wisp at the time, or my Tness may have shriveled up and died.

Just, I love her as a friend. We're close. And I realize that she has her F-type needs. I'm generally a nicer, more feeling person online and I am usually pretty good about reciprocating *hugs* and being *held* Just, last night was too much for me to take. I eventually just outright killed the mood, apologized, and was called a mood killer.

She is now going to send me a friendship-love quote EVERY DAY so I can take it in more 'managable' doses. How can I tell her to please stop without hurting her feelings?

 

[Carnap]

I would just be yourself. If you don't like what she sends just say, "that was pretty cheesy". She'll stop.

She has to adapt to you just like you are trying to adapt to her.

 

[Fedayeen]

You probably don't.

Detach yourself from her completely then straight up tell her however, and observe/study reaction.

its reactions like what she would likely have that I find so amusing to watch

 

[Inappropriate Behavior]

Is simply ignoring these quotes not an option? Simply responding "Oh that's nice, thanks" without really reading it? I have a hard time believing this daily comitment to send you quotes will last long. Especially if your responses are the same and lack emotion.

 

[FacetiousPersona]

You should articulate how your feelings differ towards matters as you're both unique individuals and explain that she should not expect identical reactions to material through this principle.

 

[Tyria]

Tell her too much to fast. While you appreciate the quotes, you are trying to digest what has already been given. Ask her to be patient and to hold off (with the quotes) for a bit.

Tell her your honest feelings about what she said to you.

 

[ChristopherL]

Last night I was skyping with one of my best friends, an ISFJ. We're really close and get along very well considering type differences. Last night, however, she was going on about love and friendship. She'd gone online and looked up various friendship-love quotes and was pasting them into Skype.

She'd offended me the day before, but I'd forgiven her fairly quickly (I hold no grudges). I can only assume that this overflow of feeling was her way of saying sorry and an expression of her love. But really now.

"To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world."

then, "That's what you are to me, Kia. ^_^"

After that I was kind of dying inside. It's like, "Okay. Love you too. I get it. Now STOP!" I think it's impossible for me to take so much feeling in one place without exploding. Thankfully I was on the phone with Wisp at the time, or my Tness may have shriveled up and died.

Just, I love her as a friend. We're close. And I realize that she has her F-type needs. I'm generally a nicer, more feeling person online and I am usually pretty good about reciprocating *hugs* and being *held* Just, last night was too much for me to take. I eventually just outright killed the mood, apologized, and was called a mood killer.

She is now going to send me a friendship-love quote EVERY DAY so I can take it in more 'managable' doses. How can I tell her to please stop without hurting her feelings?

Would it really kill you to get these quotes every day?
Make an outlook rule that send them to trash except when your name is mentioned in the body of the email.

Alienating someone who you call a friend seems to me to be just plain idiotic.
If you can't take someone as they are then you can't really take them can you?

 

[FacetiousPersona]

Discard the detrimental moron. I can't bestowal commiseration with this issue when you're effectively permitting the flawed girl to impede you as a consequence of hesitance. Stop tolerating the quandary when it's causing problems and remove it with resolution. The problem is only amplifying with your indecisiveness.

 

[Ulysses]

Discard the detrimental moron. I can't bestowal commiseration with this issue when you're effectively permitting the flawed girl to impede you as a consequence of hesitance. Stop tolerating the quandary when it's causing problems and remove it with resolution. The problem is only amplifying with your indecisiveness.

Nice bit of Engrish there. Using a translator?

 

[FacetiousPersona]

Nice bit of Engrish there. Using a translator?

Provocative and useless comment there. Trying patheticallly to troll?

 

[ChristopherL]

Provocative and useless comment there. Trying patheticallly to troll?

Either you're really smart or really stupid.
The hallmark of the master troll.

Bravo.

 

[ChristopherL]

I take it back, the two aren't mutually exclusive.

 

[FacetiousPersona]

I'd apply your 'observation' to yourself more than I would apply it to myself.

 

[snowqueen]

Last night I was skyping with one of my best friends, an ISFJ. We're really close and get along very well considering type differences. Last night, however, she was going on about love and friendship. She'd gone online and looked up various friendship-love quotes and was pasting them into Skype.

She'd offended me the day before, but I'd forgiven her fairly quickly (I hold no grudges). I can only assume that this overflow of feeling was her way of saying sorry and an expression of her love. But really now.

"To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world."

then, "That's what you are to me, Kia. ^_^"

After that I was kind of dying inside. It's like, "Okay. Love you too. I get it. Now STOP!" I think it's impossible for me to take so much feeling in one place without exploding. Thankfully I was on the phone with Wisp at the time, or my Tness may have shriveled up and died.

Just, I love her as a friend. We're close. And I realize that she has her F-type needs. I'm generally a nicer, more feeling person online and I am usually pretty good about reciprocating *hugs* and being *held* Just, last night was too much for me to take. I eventually just outright killed the mood, apologized, and was called a mood killer.

She is now going to send me a friendship-love quote EVERY DAY so I can take it in more 'managable' doses. How can I tell her to please stop without hurting her feelings?

Hi Kia

as you can imagine, I understand your difficulty here! It just amazes me how F-types really don't get how difficult it is for us to 'digest' emotions.

Some of the advice you've had here is really useful so I'll offer something a little different. Perhaps you could discuss with her what it feels like when you bombard her with a whole load of highly analytical thoughts - does she welcome it with open mind and be incredibly grateful for your input, or does she find that she tunes out after a couple of sentences or finds it overwhelming? You can see where I'm going. I think if she could connect to the experience of being bombarded by an input you find hard to process then she might begin to see why it's hard for you.

The other approach might be to say 'ok you can send me that, but in return I'm going to send you a paragraph of philosophy/physics/poetry (whatever your favourite thoughtform is) and I want you to respond to that every day until you can think really well'! That would even things out

 

[snowqueen]

Either you're really smart or really stupid.
The hallmark of the master troll.

Bravo.

Oy! Have you two learned nothing from my recent transgressions?

Come over to the insult thread and play with the masters (if you think you can outdo us hahaha)

 

[Ulysses]

Sorry, I had no idea that Seto_Kaiba would take my comment that personally. :/

Back on topic, I think you should try to avoid making any rash decisions. I'm pretty sure that she'll grow out of it sooner or later. Meanwhile, you could filter out her quotes using your email client.

 

[FacetiousPersona]

Sorry, I had no idea that Seto_Kaiba would take my comment that personally. :/

Back on topic, I think you should try to avoid making any rash decisions. I'm pretty sure that she'll grow out of it sooner or later. Meanwhile, you could filter out her quotes using your email client.

Back on topic? You were happy being off it before.

 

[ChristopherL]

Back on topic? You were happy being off it before.

Just let it go.

an eye for an eye leaves us all blind, stupid is optional.

That last part is a joke, let that go too.

 

[Fedayeen]

Just let it go.

an eye for an eye leaves us all blind, stupid is optional.

That last part is a joke, let that go too.

nah, an eye for an eye leaves us like cyclops

 

[FacetiousPersona]

nah, an eye for an eye leaves us like cyclops

He was probably conveying that it becomes a contentious process because of people's tendency to seek revenge for the sake of their ego (or another reason), which consequently results in the 'eye for an eye' continuing until both are blind and it moves onto other body parts.

 

[Fedayeen]

He was probably conveying that it becomes a contentious process because of people's tendency to seek revenge for the sake of their ego (or another reason), which consequently results in the 'eye for an eye' continuing until both are blind and it moves onto other body parts.

I know what he meant

 

[bdubs]

Sarcasm/joking doesn't seem to translate well over the internet it seems.

I know I would feel uncomfortable if a friend of mine (even a good one) continuously made such comments about me in a public forum like twitter. I think that if I were in your position I would explain to her that she is making me feel uncomfortable. That I deeply appreciate the meaning behind the quotes, but can not help but feel somewhat put off by them. Ideally, it would allow for the two of you to discuss your perspectives.

Then again... I'm no expert in this so take what I have to say with a grain of salt.

 

[dwags222]

the only thing i've learned from reading this thread is that seto_kaiba or whatever his name is a douche. more proof that people who purposely avoid colloquialism suck.

 

[s0nystyle]

*_* from reading this thread it seems that you ppl dont like dooshbags >.>

 

[Tyria]

Isn't kaiba actually face though?