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has this happened to you?

floccinaucci

homunculus
Local time
Yesterday 8:40 PM
Joined
Aug 16, 2009
Messages
33
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Location
Earth
Today at work someone mentioned how they were "pigeon holed" in their apartment. After he said this I immediately start thinking about the pigeon hole paradox and I began to explain to my co-workers what it is. after I gave him a brief overview of the paradox he turns away and started talking to someone else completely disregarding what I just said. almost like he asked me what it was just to ignore me. it gets better A female co-worker asked me how they make Doritos taste like a hamburger(gross by the way.) After i explain the basics of taste, she asked me of i saw some movie about raining meatballs? I think I'm about done with the lot of humanity. or at least done with the Midwest. any similar events you'd like to share?
 

RubberDucky451

Prolific Member
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May 22, 2009
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1,078
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Location
California
I find it especially painful when someone tries to explain a movie or a TV show to me. For instances such as these, i installed a application that makes my phone ring after a specific minute count. If someone calls you over to talk, you get to choose how long you talk (before your phone goes off) :)

You have to be prepared!
 

Ermine

is watching and taking notes
Local time
Yesterday 6:40 PM
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Dec 24, 2007
Messages
2,871
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Location
casually playing guitar in my mental arena
That's why I'm choosy about the people I choose to converse with. I want someone to actually listen to me, not brush me off and talk about that horrible movie remake of the book "Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs". And I don't think the average caliber of conversation changes by region. I used to live in the midwest, and then on the east coast. Now I'm in the west out in the relative middle of nowhere, and nothing has changed much. It's all a matter of being choosy about the people you hang out with.

That's pretty much the story of my life though. I don't care about what they're talking about for the most part, and they don't care about what I'm talking about usually, but we try to humor each other all the same. It's really sad. And people wonder why I don't talk much...
 

Inappropriate Behavior

is peeing on the carpet
Local time
Yesterday 8:40 PM
Joined
Sep 21, 2008
Messages
3,795
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Location
Behind you, kicking you in the ass
Too bad there is no actual ignore button you could push to return the favor. Look on the bright side though, now you know this person isn't worth your time so therefore you don't need to waste it speaking to him beyond the work obligations. I like Ermine's solution of being choosy in who you ingage in non-work related conversation. Only problem is sometimes you have to learn the hard way who is worth choosing. You can't always tell and you don't always get to observe beforehand *shudders at that last thought*

Oh, to answer the question: Why most certainly it has happened to me. Often enough that the instances all blur together into one big giant ignore.
 

shoeless

I AM A WIZARD
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Today 1:40 AM
Joined
Aug 19, 2009
Messages
1,196
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Location
the in-between
this is going to sound elitist and judgmental and gross, but that's not how i intend it to be at all.

could it possibly be the way you relate the information?

it doesn't happen to me all that often (it does, still, but some people are just hopeless) and that's because i try to maintain a level of interest and relatability that will keep people from blowing me off while i'm rambling on about something they probably don't care about it.

make it interesting. if you're too professorial about it, it's just because they're bored, more often than not. that's not to say dumb yourself down, but... color it up a bit, you know?

and don't stray TOO far from the line of your conversation, because that can get annoying.

just my two cents.
 

Cognisant

cackling in the trenches
Local time
Yesterday 2:40 PM
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Dec 12, 2009
Messages
11,155
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that's not to say dumb yourself down, but... color it up a bit, you know?
How do you do that?

this is going to sound elitist and judgmental and gross, but that's not how i intend it to be at all.
Suure you dooo :twisteddevil:
 

snowqueen

mysteriously benevolent
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Mar 28, 2009
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1,359
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Location
mostly in the vast space inside
I have recently instituted the 10 minute rule in my social conversations. If someone hasn't engaged my attention by 10 minutes I make an excuse and walk away. My time is precious to me and I no longer wish to waste it being 'polite' to people.
 

Nevermind

aus dem nix
Local time
Yesterday 7:40 PM
Joined
Apr 21, 2009
Messages
96
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Location
in Gedanken
this is going to sound elitist and judgmental and gross, but that's not how i intend it to be at all.

could it possibly be the way you relate the information?

it doesn't happen to me all that often (it does, still, but some people are just hopeless) and that's because i try to maintain a level of interest and relatability that will keep people from blowing me off while i'm rambling on about something they probably don't care about it.

make it interesting. if you're too professorial about it, it's just because they're bored, more often than not. that's not to say dumb yourself down, but... color it up a bit, you know?

and don't stray TOO far from the line of your conversation, because that can get annoying.

just my two cents.

Good point. Some of us, I think, have more experience socially than others. As for myself, I've drastically improved my social abilities over the past three years.

Anyway, like Shoeless said, if you just drone on about something like a bloody computer, you're either going to bore them to death or scare them with your knowledge. If you scare them, then they may be too intimidated to respond for fear of sounding stupid.
So..I dunno how to explain it, but you have to be more..interesting, and maybe cut it down. When someone asks how something is done, they usually don't want detailed instructions and an explanation behind the basic theory. For many people, "they spray it with magic dust" would be a sufficient answer and probably more than they even expected.
I've exaggerating a bit there, but hopefully you get the point.
 

lafmeche

Inmate#2626
Local time
Yesterday 8:40 PM
Joined
Jan 9, 2010
Messages
111
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Today at work someone mentioned how they were "pigeon holed" in their apartment. After he said this I immediately start thinking about the pigeon hole paradox and I began to explain to my co-workers what it is. after I gave him a brief overview of the paradox he turns away and started talking to someone else completely disregarding what I just said. almost like he asked me what it was just to ignore me. it gets better A female co-worker asked me how they make Doritos taste like a hamburger(gross by the way.) After i explain the basics of taste, she asked me of i saw some movie about raining meatballs? I think I'm about done with the lot of humanity. or at least done with the Midwest. any similar events you'd like to share?
I've found that most 'normal' people (that I deal with, anyway) don't really care how things work or why things happen. Even if they ask, I've found that they generally ask the question 1) to fill the void or 2) as some sort of commentary (ie. that's weird). If they are looking for an answer, they want it to be short and to the point and they will get bored or antsy if you get too detailed.

As shoeless said, a lot of it is in how you (or at least I) deliver the information. If you make it interesting enough, you can get away with long explanations. People like interesting stories, but they generally don't care about the details. They like that you're entertaining them.

Edit: Nevermind beat me to some of it, but I'll leave it anyway
 

citrusbreath95

Tourist of this dimension
Local time
Yesterday 8:40 PM
Joined
Jan 18, 2010
Messages
291
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I know exactly what you mean! (Oh, and the raining meatball movie is cloudy with a chance of meatballs- ha ha!) But yes, I know exactly what you mean by this. Once, my mom asked me what time is was so I explained how time is all but relative, and that you cannot be surely capable of telling time unless given a specific frame of reference... then she just turned and changed the conversation... I suppose she assumed I was being random, ignorant, or perhaps sarcastic... only she didn't understand it was nothing of the sort! I hate it when people misinterpret things that are actually quite simple in meaning!:slashnew: I think people are just so consumed in every day life, and their own selves that any thoughts foreign to them are dismissed as being irrelevent or unimportant.
 

citrusbreath95

Tourist of this dimension
Local time
Yesterday 8:40 PM
Joined
Jan 18, 2010
Messages
291
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Agreed! People just accept why and how things work. They just want a simple answer if something is or isn't. Yet, if you explain how that something came to be or does what it does, they dismiss it as being unimportant! Ahhh, so agitating:storks:
 

floccinaucci

homunculus
Local time
Yesterday 8:40 PM
Joined
Aug 16, 2009
Messages
33
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Location
Earth
Good point. Some of us, I think, have more experience socially than others. As for myself, I've drastically improved my social abilities over the past three years.

Anyway, like Shoeless said, if you just drone on about something like a bloody computer, you're either going to bore them to death or scare them with your knowledge. If you scare them, then they may be too intimidated to respond for fear of sounding stupid.
So..I dunno how to explain it, but you have to be more..interesting, and maybe cut it down. When someone asks how something is done, they usually don't want detailed instructions and an explanation behind the basic theory. For many people, "they spray it with magic dust" would be a sufficient answer and probably more than they even expected.
I've exaggerating a bit there, but hopefully you get the point.

I don't know how many times I've kept quiet because I was afraid of making myself look dumb around a smarter person. I don't think of myself as a smart person. I'm just a learner, And I make sure never to come off as arrogant. So I never even bothered putting on those shoes(is there connection with that name Shoeless? walking in no ones shoes maybe? )
 

citrusbreath95

Tourist of this dimension
Local time
Yesterday 8:40 PM
Joined
Jan 18, 2010
Messages
291
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cb95 were you talking to yourself there?

Ah no, I was not, I was trying to respond to floccinaucci's beggining remark, I didn't know how to put up quotes before today... I'm new here:)
 

snowqueen

mysteriously benevolent
Local time
Today 1:40 AM
Joined
Mar 28, 2009
Messages
1,359
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Location
mostly in the vast space inside
Ah no, I was not, I was trying to respond to floccinaucci's beggining remark, I didn't know how to put up quotes before today... I'm new here:)

and you're very welcome - was just teasing :p
 

Gather_Wanderer

Space Jokes.
Local time
Yesterday 7:40 PM
Joined
Jan 12, 2010
Messages
619
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Location
Chicago
Today at work someone mentioned how they were "pigeon holed" in their apartment. After he said this I immediately start thinking about the pigeon hole paradox and I began to explain to my co-workers what it is. after I gave him a brief overview of the paradox he turns away and started talking to someone else completely disregarding what I just said. almost like he asked me what it was just to ignore me. it gets better A female co-worker asked me how they make Doritos taste like a hamburger(gross by the way.) After i explain the basics of taste, she asked me of i saw some movie about raining meatballs? I think I'm about done with the lot of humanity. or at least done with the Midwest. any similar events you'd like to share?

thank you for making me laugh. i mean i know it isn't really funny but....maybe that's how my sense of humor has evolved. most people are so thoughtless that they provide some form of comedy, serving as easily manipulated instruments.
 

FrostFern

Active Member
Local time
Yesterday 8:40 PM
Joined
Jan 15, 2010
Messages
109
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You have to realize that most of the time when people talk they don't really have much interest in the actual subject of conversation. That's why it's called small-talk. It's a form of interaction designed to create a feeling of group cohesion / camaraderie. Going too far or giving too much detail on a particular subject is considered socially inappropriate. I don't really get it either, I just force myself to play along for as long as I can tolerate it.
 

ktp

Member
Local time
Yesterday 8:40 PM
Joined
Oct 27, 2009
Messages
61
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What is the piegon hole paradox exactly? I'm interested in knowing
 

Geminii

Consultant, inventor, project innovator
Local time
Today 9:40 AM
Joined
Jan 7, 2010
Messages
222
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Location
Perth, Australia
Infodumps are hard to respond to. Try giving the shortest possible summary - five words or less, if you can. That way, if they are really truly interested, they can ask more - and if they really weren't in the first place, they can switch topic easily without you having invested lots of time and brainpower into the original subject.

There's also the rule that less is said with words than tone of voice or body language. Learn to be fun as well as a brainbox. Wit isn't too hard to master for N types, and from there it's a short stop to elegant comedy, presentation comedy, and being The Funny Guy in the room. That opens up a lot more social data, letting you move on to more subtle variations, such as The Romantic or The Leader.
 
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