happiness.

[WALKYRIA]

At what age you became happy/content/ satisfied with your life ?

I heard something like mid 30's is the average for INTP's... pretty late.

 

[Rocco]

Good, then I haven't got more than a decade to go.

 

[RadicalDreamer31]

Really, mid 30's is average? I've figured as much for myself, I know I have plenty of fumbling and stumbling and frustration ahead of me before I really get a grip on things.

How much of a part does personality play in becoming happy /content /satisfied at certain ages? Some people I know lived their fullest in high school and college, their lives are in a decline now through. Others I know are getting married / careers and having children right now (which upsets me, because I have no such things)

Life pacing... At what age does one live the fullest, average to their MBTI-Type?

 

[DIALECTIC]

At what age you became happy/content/ satisfied with your life ?
I heard something like mid 30's is the average for INTP's... pretty late.

For me (i turned 39 in november last year): Between 38 and 39... Even though it created other problems... Namely that i find / made myself isolated as fuck from my old S / F dominant acquaintances so im more independant than ever.

Very worst time was between 28 and 37-38 (drugs, junk food, emotional roller coaster, alcohol etc)... With the peak, or rather the nadir, at age 35-36... Major existencial /epistemological crisis...

 

[Inappropriate Behavior]

At what age you became happy/content/ satisfied with your life ?

I heard something like mid 30's is the average for INTP's... pretty late.

Does adopting a meh, whatever attitude count as content? If not then I'm skewing the average upward.

 

[Ex-User (5841)]

I began to experience it off and on when I was 20 and realized how much I enjoyed by career field, but happiness didn't become a more permanent worldview fixture until I was 24. The catalyst was the development of existential wisdom. Isolation, drugs, and relationships et al had nothing to do with it.

 

[Hayyel]

Oh, this is a good question. I kind of wondered about it too, not that I am miserable or anything, but I do think that it could get better. Now I am waiting for a miracle- either to finally find a guy that doesn't bore me ( which will be hard since I am not attractive at all), or to finally just give up on it and get on with things. By the way, how o people realize that they are happy? I think the most I ever had was content.

 

[SpaceYeti]

I think INTP happiness is really whenever they can sustain themselves with a decent life style and other people don't bust up their personal space, both. Mid thirties seems pretty accurate if only because people tend to have steady jobs and people mostly leave you alone when you're home.

I've always been a pretty jolly guy, but I have had periods of depression. My depressions had obvious causes, though, and were relieved as soon as the problem was corrected. I can thrive in most situations, granting my basic needs and a modicum of privacy are granted.

 

[Vrecknidj]

At what age you became happy/content/ satisfied with your life ?

I heard something like mid 30's is the average for INTP's... pretty late.

I'm in my middle 40s and I haven't found anything resembling contentment.

 

[kvothe27]

What is happiness? According to a book I'm reading, The Adjusted American, "Happiness is the emotional state that accompanies need satisfaction." Once I figure out what my needs are exactly and how exactly to best meet them, then perhaps I'll be happy, if this definition is correct. Until then, I'll be subsisting on plenty of Valium. Of course, such a chemical crutch could preclude my ability to identify what meets my needs. *sigh*

The problem is that our culture, media, religions, etc., try to tell us what our needs are and how best to meet them, so this is a difficult process.

But then, why not just say, "To hell with that definition," and, instead of trying to meet my needs, find contentment via mindfulness meditation in both states of deprivation or need fulfillment.

I seriously doubt the American Dream is the way to happiness. I also doubt the MBTI is effective enough as a tool in finding happiness or even approximating it. This is an ancient question and I wager I'll struggle with it my entire life.

 

[Ex-User (5841)]

What is happiness? According to a book I'm reading, The Adjusted American, "Happiness is the emotional state that accompanies need satisfaction." Once I figure out what my needs are exactly and how exactly to best meet them, then perhaps I'll be happy, if this definition is correct. Until then, I'll be subsisting on plenty of Valium. Of course, such a chemical crutch could preclude my ability to identify what meets my needs. *sigh*

But then, why not just say, "To hell with that definition,"

What if you have no, or extremely few needs or desires, and thus skip over the part where you obtain or fulfill them entirely? Is that also happiness? What if everything you do and everything that happens, is merely an experience? Is Valium, then, still necessary?

 

[kvothe27]

What if you have no, or extremely few needs or desires, and thus skip over the part where you obtain or fulfill them entirely? Is that also happiness? What if everything you do and everything that happens, is merely an experience? Is Valium, then, still necessary?

Well, then, according to the definition, you'd obviously be happy if you were meeting your extremely few needs. If you skip over them in the case of having few needs, you wouldn't be happy if skipping over them entailed not having them fulfilled, according to the definition. This, of course, assumes one knows for sure one only has extremely few needs and doesn't just wish to have extremely few needs.

If one has no needs, I'd imagine that person would be dead and thus the question becomes irrelevant, but then perhaps that depends on the definition of "need" or whether it is possible for a human to exist with no needs.

What do you mean by "merely an experience." Do you mean an experience stripped, for example, of meaning, ego, interpretation? If it is one stripped of interpretation, etc., then I'd probably never interpret a situation as requiring a chemical crutch. In that case, whether I require valium would be outside of my abilities or preference. I'd just experience the anxiety or panic attack all else being equal.

 

[Ex-User (5841)]

Well, then, according to the definition, you'd obviously be happy if you were meeting your extremely few needs. If you skip over them in the case of having few needs, you wouldn't be happy

If one has no needs, I'd imagine that person would be dead and thus the question becomes irrelevant, but then perhaps that depends on the definition of "need" or whether it is possible for a human to exist with no needs.

What do you mean by "merely an experience." Do you mean an experience stripped, for example, of meaning, ego, interpretation?

I'm thinking in terms of Buddhist and similar philosophies that reject materialism, so long as the basics of food, shelter, etc are met.

As far as experience, I mean more like letting your emotions run free. Being detached from desire to the point you're able to say "oh, that was cool" or "oh, that sucked" about... everything, and just keep moving on, watching the show. It doesn't have to be stripped of any of the three you mentioned. For example, interpretation can bring pleasure, but pleasure doesn't need to be a necessity, just icing on the cake when it happens.

Though one just has to know, since "for sure" implies doubt and rumination

 

[kvothe27]

I'm thinking in terms of Buddhist and similar philosophies that reject materialism, so long as the basics of food, shelter, etc are met.

As far as experience, I mean more like letting your emotions run free. Being detached from desire to the point you're able to say "oh, that was cool" or "oh, that sucked" about... everything, and just keep moving on, watching the show. It doesn't have to be stripped of any of the three you mentioned. For example, interpretation can bring pleasure, but pleasure doesn't need to be a necessity, just icing on the cake when it happens.

Though one just has to know, since "for sure" implies doubt and rumination

If you practice Buddhism to the extent that your needs are limited to the basics, then your emotions and desires, at least in the way you're describing them, would be outside that definition of happiness in accordance with your needs, and therefore irrelevant to your happiness.

If, however, you have a level of anxiety that overrides your ability to meet the basics due to panic attacks and anxiety, then perhaps Valium is required for need fulfillment to ascertain those basics, in which case emotions -- namely, debilitating anxiety -- become important to need satisfaction.

Of course, this all goes back to identifying what your needs are, which is a difficult process as previously stated.

 

[Ex-User (5841)]

If, however, you have a level of anxiety that overrides your ability to meet the basics due to panic attacks and anxiety, then perhaps Valium is required for need fulfillment to ascertain those basics, in which case emotions -- namely, debilitating anxiety -- become important to need satisfaction.

Of course, this all goes back to identifying what your needs are, which is a difficult process as previously stated.

In my experience, anxiety and paranoia become a factor when my focus wanders too far from the basics; status, wealth, etc. For example, I don't fear being without any necessities anywhere on the planet, being homeless, etc; but I go through bouts of fear of other people, professors, social norms. I believe a large part of this is knowledge (i.e. I'm not a yuppie cut off from our animalistic mechanisms of basic survival), and what reinforces what little faith I have in humanity is the fact that information can be shared with little effort.

Perhaps happiness is the ability to subjectively construct a ceiling somewhere inside Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Someone with a lower ceiling might see X as an experience, while someone with a slightly higher ceiling might see it as a necessity.

Thanks. This has been productive

 

[kvothe27]

In my experience, anxiety and paranoia become a factor when my focus wanders too far from the basics; status, wealth, etc. For example, I don't fear being without any necessities anywhere on the planet, being homeless, etc; but I go through bouts of fear of other people, professors, social norms. I believe a large part of this is knowledge (i.e. I'm not a yuppie cut off from our animalistic mechanisms of basic survival), and what reinforces what little faith I have in humanity is the fact that information can be shared with little effort.

Perhaps happiness is the ability to subjectively construct a ceiling somewhere inside Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Someone with a lower ceiling might see X as an experience, while someone with a slightly higher ceiling might see it as a necessity.

Thanks. This has been productive

Perhaps many religions serve such a purpose in lowering that ceiling via prayer or meditation, and other functions. Mitigate the ego via Buddhist practice and find your needs mitigated, thus making happiness easier to acquire. That, or surrender to some higher power, whether real or fictional, to reduce the anxiety in meeting those needs by trusting the higher power will meet those needs or determine what needs are suitable.

Mitigate your socialized self-concept via mindfulness or trust in some supernatural parental figure to meet those needs. In both cases, happiness is easier to acquire because need satisfaction is easier.