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Dealing with types having Fi

BurnedOut

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I have always had an easier time dealing with types with Fe. This is because, to me, they are quite clear and direct about their emotions in some or the other manner. They show it overtly which is good and preferable for me because it aids greatly in the trial and error process of correcting some behaviour or lead to problem solving or provide an awareness to take an alternative course of action.

My personal preference lies in communication that is not confusing. Fe users seem to do the job well. I am talking about every type containing Fe. While I am socializing, I would always prefer someone who understands the emotional tone of the conversation and reacts accordingly. This is one of the reasons why I find even TPs pleasant to be around with.

I have experienced a shittonne of pigheadedness from Fi users throughout my childhood. They simply refuse to tell properly what is aggrieving them. Moreover, IFPs and TJs are really unapproachable in many cases. They seem too clannish for me and very closed-minded about understanding or accepting other types of people.

Every FP/TJ I have met has a serious judging and whining problem towards other people. They always have some or the other type of feeling that bugs them about everybody and when they start complaining about it, oh my god, it is intolerable. Almost all of the FP/TJ start such exhausting tirades which usually consists of blaming the other party for having XYZ undesirable traits.

Also, I have historically had communication issues with FP/TJ where I felt that I was walking on a thin line all the time. Later, I just learned to ignore and be very discerning what I tell them.

For example,
I have fights with an ESTJ and an ESFJ regularly. I am able to sort things with the ESFJ very quickly. It is also that I can tolerate that ESFJ more when I want to socialize. The ESTJ in a pleasant mood is good too but again, I am confused about crossing the line inadvertently and it has happened in many cases that I ended up offending an FP/TJ for reasons that they have never told me.

Sometimes, it becomes a burden to be with them during crisis situations wherein good communication becomes very imperative. I have to constantly 'figure' them out and they take great pleasure in being 'figured out' than being simple about their needs. The problem with 'figuring' them is that if you miss the point, then you, again, end up offending them.

The reason why I am making this post is that I think that this kind of emotional behaviour is unhealthy scientifically. Not communicating properly about your values/belief system and what bugs you or makes you happy and then justifying such behaviour in the name of 'I can read people accurately and I understand their emotional functioning.' seems like building an expectation on the understood party to understand that FP/SJ in return which is usually the case because I have indeed heard a lot of Fi users about not 'receiving' stuff back from the aggrieved party. This kind of behaviour is quite conflict-prone for the simple reason that it is actually a gargantuan responsibility on others to continuously 'figure' out the wants, needs of the Fi user.

Obviously, I draw my observations from not-so-mature TJ/FPs and the average populace.
 
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