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Old 16th-May-2017, 01:58 PM   #1
Rixus
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Default What scares you most of all?

What really strikes fear into your heart? Why? Does it affect your life in any way? Is it something you are likely to encounter? Is it something you have faced? Are you able to face it? How has this changed since you were young and grew up?
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Old 16th-May-2017, 04:13 PM   #2
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Default Re: What scares you most of all?

Losing Silina and Set. I don't want to go back to being alone.

[Silina: I can't really even imagine a life without them so I wouldn't know and I can't be bothered with fear. I'll leave that to the other 2.]

{Set: Fading away, losing my sense of identity. I am a bit fragmented, so it's a risk.}
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Old 16th-May-2017, 11:41 PM   #3
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Default Re: What scares you most of all?

Wasting all my studies because of the country crisis. Have to work to eat while I'm trying to get a grade in Physics, had to choose between my true love (that's physics) and living...
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Old 17th-May-2017, 01:43 PM   #4
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Default Re: What scares you most of all?

Being utterly alone like in the movie "Castaway" or "I am Legend", it's like being in a sauna, for brief periods it's relaxing but being there 24/7 is a living hell.

Edit: The sauna is a bad example, too short term.
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Old 17th-May-2017, 02:45 PM   #5
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Default Re: What scares you most of all?

For me, loneliness per se isn't a problem. It's just normality.

What scares me is the thought of dying without meaning - life or death having meant nothing or done nothing to enrich the world before I go and to simply disappear and be forgotten. It would make it pointless to have lived at all.
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Old 17th-May-2017, 04:02 PM   #6
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Default Re: What scares you most of all?

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Originally Posted by Rixus View Post
For me, loneliness per se isn't a problem. It's just normality.

What scares me is the thought of dying without meaning - life or death having meant nothing or done nothing to enrich the world before I go and to simply disappear and be forgotten. It would make it pointless to have lived at all.
...unfortunately, in 100,000 years it's all the same anyway. One day humanity will be gone, so longevity of accomplishment is not really an option.

Still, in the here and now, it's vital to have a sense of purpose in order to motivate one's actions.
 
----
Death is a weird concept to think about, now that I'm coming within a stone's throw of it. (Well, a few stone's throws.) It didn't use to bother me, but my beliefs have also changed over the years.

My original fear used to be of eternity. I had believed I would live forever (my soul) and eternity was so big that I could not comprehend it; I remember crying uncontrollably in my bed when I was 5-6 because I couldn't fathom it nor articulate it to my parents.

Now, if there is nothing beyond what we see and when we die, we die... well, I guess death is a little more fearsome. But there is nothing we can do about it, so what's the point in thinking about it? We each are born into a death sentence without possibility of parole, and that's just that. Fearing it seems to simply detract from the quality of one's given life, so just live in a way you can be proud of.

Loneliness can be kind of excruciating. It's not like I need people, I am very capable of occupying myself 24/7 and have enough ideas/projects I could always be doing something. But it can feel like you're trapped in The Cage of You, with everything just being a reflection of yourself; it's a bit scary but great to have ideas and interactions coming back to you that you cannot anticipate and be fed new ideas and ways of looking at things. Plus, it's not really a logical thing, but there is something to simply not being alone all the time. Even to feel another warm body leaning against you.

One thing I get more anxious about is being incapacitated so that I can no longer care for myself and/or can no longer do the things I enjoy... trapped in a prison of the body. My grandfather lived until age 95 because he had a strong heart, but by the end he had been unable to walk, couldn't see, and could barely hear. After my grandmother (who was his constant companion and caretaker) died, he lived another two years before passing. I'm not sure how he did it. I would rather die.
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Old 17th-May-2017, 04:48 PM   #7
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Default Re: What scares you most of all?

I'm not saying that eternal isolation is a good thing. It's quite unpleasant, and never having anyone to cwtch up to at night is quite depressing. And maybe that's why I post on the internet a lot. But it's not something to be afraid of - because it simply is and can't be changed. It would be like a paraplegic being afraid to lose their legs.

In a hundred billion years, the heat dearth of the universe will mean none of any of this served any purpose. But that's too nihilistic for me - the world is full of people and things that will live on for centuries and maybe millennia after my end. I'm only here for a short stint and it motivates me to at least do some good while I'm here. The idea of it all being for nothing, though, that does scare me.

I think both those things you mentioned are basically the same - the eternity of being trapped, being trapped inside your own mind. Considering loneliness a cage of your own mind. It's interesting for introverted thinkers who spend so much time inside their heads (and I think most of you had higher Ti levels than I).
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Old 17th-May-2017, 05:07 PM   #8
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Default Re: What scares you most of all?

Well, one problem that I hinted at -- you aren't getting new information to "prime the pump" [(c)opyright Trump Organization]. And another is that you know you're just hearing your own voice within your head -- where is your anchor to an external reality? There has to be something by which you can verify your own thinking. Otherwise you might just be insane and not know it.
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Old 17th-May-2017, 06:25 PM   #9
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Default Re: What scares you most of all?

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Well, one problem that I hinted at -- you aren't getting new information to "prime the pump" [(c)opyright Trump Organization]. And another is that you know you're just hearing your own voice within your head -- where is your anchor to an external reality? There has to be something by which you can verify your own thinking. Otherwise you might just be insane and not know it.
Well, yes. I do tend to retreat into myself a lot more the last few years. And yes, I probably am insane. But then, that's what you guys are the for - you can tell me if I'm truly insane or not.

And btw, speaking of advice from others, The Thing prequel. Is it worth watching?

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Old 17th-May-2017, 06:35 PM   #10
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Default Re: What scares you most of all?

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Well, yes. I do tend to retreat into myself a lot more the last few years. And yes, I probably am insane. But then, that's what you guys are the for - you can tell me if I'm truly insane or not.



Quote:
And btw, speaking of advice from others, The Thing prequel. Is it worth watching?
Special effects are better in the terms of looking real and seamless, but I think the 1980 "The Thing" is better overall as a movie, or at least more interesting to watch and think about.

It's sufficient to pass 90 minutes of time or whatever, without feeling like a complete waste (as some movies do), but it's not gonna be nominated for awards or occupy cinematic talk channels for years after.

it does mesh up with the 1980 version neatly.

I guess the big question is, "Did we need the prequel?" The answer is "no, not really."
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Old 18th-May-2017, 12:09 AM   #11
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Default Re: What scares you most of all?

Being controlled.
- by parents, partners, 'friends', etc etc etc. The thought of this gets my "fight" reflex turned on more than flight or freeze.

Having things that are mine taken away from me against my wishes.
- this is the biggest way I have been controlled in the past. Having things that I feel I have the right to have taken. Internet access, communication with anyone. Having my friends and my aunt forcefully taken from me (having all means of communication with them cut..etc..) Also applies to government laws though. I lean toward libertarian philosophy in that- if I want to ride in the back of a pick up truck, I should be able to. The gov. can't tell me not to, because it's my truck, and my safety that's at risk, and I'm not endangering others. this ties into the next point, because being deprived of things makes me miserable.

Getting depressed again.
- going through depression is important for your growth and wellness as a human being. You learn a lot from it and become more well rounded and experienced. You couldn't trade me the world though to have me go through that again. I'm scared of getting depressed. It's a sinkhole or dark place in your psyche. I was pushed into it before, and then went searching around, bitter all the while. I found out a lot of things about myself. But I don't want to get stuck in that dark maze again. It's miserable and I've already explored it.

These all sorta tie together for me.
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Old 18th-May-2017, 02:41 AM   #12
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Default Re: What scares you most of all?

Something that I always thought of were the people who knew me in different settings throughout my life coming together after I die and finding shit out that the others didn't know. There are strong divides between the "groups" of people I know (groups being family A and B, friend circle A, B and C, Work, and Other) some of these groups have zero knowledge of or contact with some other groups, groups that do intersect have very little contact with each other.

If I passed, all groups may rapidly intersect and exchange information that may shock the other group, or cause some chaos/conflict, but mostly it's awkward to know that these people who knew me one way will now know other stuff.
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Old 20th-May-2017, 04:36 PM   #13
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Default Re: What scares you most of all?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jennywocky View Post
...unfortunately, in 100,000 years it's all the same anyway. One day humanity will be gone, so longevity of accomplishment is not really an option.

Still, in the here and now, it's vital to have a sense of purpose in order to motivate one's actions.
 
----
Death is a weird concept to think about, now that I'm coming within a stone's throw of it. (Well, a few stone's throws.) It didn't use to bother me, but my beliefs have also changed over the years.

My original fear used to be of eternity. I had believed I would live forever (my soul) and eternity was so big that I could not comprehend it; I remember crying uncontrollably in my bed when I was 5-6 because I couldn't fathom it nor articulate it to my parents.

Now, if there is nothing beyond what we see and when we die, we die... well, I guess death is a little more fearsome. But there is nothing we can do about it, so what's the point in thinking about it? We each are born into a death sentence without possibility of parole, and that's just that. Fearing it seems to simply detract from the quality of one's given life, so just live in a way you can be proud of.

Loneliness can be kind of excruciating. It's not like I need people, I am very capable of occupying myself 24/7 and have enough ideas/projects I could always be doing something. But it can feel like you're trapped in The Cage of You, with everything just being a reflection of yourself; it's a bit scary but great to have ideas and interactions coming back to you that you cannot anticipate and be fed new ideas and ways of looking at things. Plus, it's not really a logical thing, but there is something to simply not being alone all the time. Even to feel another warm body leaning against you.

One thing I get more anxious about is being incapacitated so that I can no longer care for myself and/or can no longer do the things I enjoy... trapped in a prison of the body. My grandfather lived until age 95 because he had a strong heart, but by the end he had been unable to walk, couldn't see, and could barely hear. After my grandmother (who was his constant companion and caretaker) died, he lived another two years before passing. I'm not sure how he did it. I would rather die.
Yes. That incapacitation would be worse than death itself I guess...
If you cannot exist properly anymore why exist at all,.
(while I don't care too much about people... for some reason being a burden would be the worst)

Adding to that list:
Loosing interest in things previously enjoyed.
Some things one needs to stay sane... May it be hobbies or arts.. whatwver works.
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