Originally Posted by QuickTwist
Shame is an emotion - a feeling - a thought process - that I think everyone can do without.
No. No way. Specifically, if you're identifying it as a thought process and seeing it as detrimental, you haven't fully fleshed out that process. Now.... improper activation
of that process, yeah, that causes problems, and I think that's what you're getting at *here.
Theoretical example: You feel shame because of some intrinsic bodily feature or disability, or because you stole a cookie from the cookie jar when you were 9. Shame in this case is pointless. The cause was never within your conscious control and/or you never knew it to be wrong.
Compare that to shame after consciously choosing to do something you know is wrong. The unpleasantness of shame serves a purpose there as a catalyst for change and alteration of future behavior.
But back to OP and *here. It seems like you're experiencing a diversion between your own values and those of others, which is common and normal. Hell yeah, be yourself.